Say you Love me

(13) Raison d'etre

*A reason for existing*
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(I present you Nicholas Dawson🙊)

NICHOLAS POV

With time no one heals, it's the hard truth I accepted in the last one month. But with time and acceptance you learn living your life instead of sulking all day long. It's a vicious cycle and it will end you completely even before you notice. So we all need to accept and try to live life with it even if you feel a part of your heart isn't with you. It gets better with time. With time you learn living with your wounds.

Okay okay I already said too much. But this is what I feel even if I literally repeat the same line but with different variations.

The conclusion is the Therapy helped me and it is still helping me. Even if it is slow, even if I literally killed Keith, even if it was so overwhelming that I locked myself for three day and Joshua had to come to my hotel and kick me out of my bed. Okay he didn't kick me, because I am still his boss, but he did give me a earful for not taking care of me.

"Ale you listening Nick?" A baby bubbly voice breaks the trance.

"Yes my princess, Did u get my gift?" I asked smiling . I missed her so much but my work and therapy took all my time.

"Yes yes, but I want you here Nick. I misss you so much" Aww my poor baby , her lips wobble.

"Babe I am gonna meet you soon, so tell me how much you loved your gift" I asked happily although I felt pathetic.

" A lot Nick. Josh brought so many gifts and we are going to amusement park tomorrow. Yayyyyy. Thank you soooo muchhhh" She squeels with happiness.

"Wow that's good. I wish I was their" I made a pouty face and immediately I heard a baby laugh. This!!

"You look stupid Nick" I heard joshua's voice.
And like that he immediately ruined my mood.

"Now don't make sour face" Joshua laughed

I am gonna kill him one day. But today I decide to ignore him.

"So sunshine who are going with you tomorrow? "

"I... Um mom, dada will no go.umhhhh Josh.... " She was Animatedly speaking while counting her fingers. And the only thing I could think about is will it be stupid if I confess that I also want a family . A kid to love and a wife to cherish.. Wife I still can't give anyone that place.

"Nic-"

"Nick.. Nick... Can we tate Your Miss Bidisa?.. She is nice and fun"... I definitely can arrange tickets...

" No she can't come, I mean she-she is a busy person and have a lot of work to do. And Bidisa is not his darling"Joshua said with an edge in his voice. And the last sentence was literally a whishper..

Hmmmm

"She can go princess. She also need a leave . I will inform her" I told her too sweetly that I cringe from inside but the face Joshua gave me was worth it.

"But now I have to go babe, I have work to do. Talk to you later" I cut the call before Joshua could say anything..

I text Bidisa about the arrangements. And decide to work on the new project I am working on.
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I didn't even realise when the time passed away. I worked for atleast 4 hours straight. And as soon as I close my laptop I got a call.

A call from non other than Keith. I was expecting anyway.

"Hello"

"You didn't" He said

"What?, speak in sentence" I said deliberately trying to edge him. It's fun when your therapist himself fill out of control.

"You didn't just decide to invest in our Hospital!! Why?? Why do you want our hospital to work with you!! " He said little bit overwhelmed but excitement in his voice evident..

He is a nice guy thats what I realised too. He emphatises with people. And he loves the hospital like a family. This hospital isn't big and that was one reason Joshua sent me here to avoid paparazzi. One day outside of therapy session we talked to each other about life and everything. That's when I get to know how much he cared for this hospital, how everyone is like a family. This hospital although isn't that big but they still try to give free aids to NGO's and people in need...

And so here I am investing in this hospital. I wanted to step foot in hospital management and here it becomes a win win situation for me.

He once told me that this Hospital grew little popular 4 years ago when a certain someone changed few things in here and they treat her like and angel. And I saw Keith's eye sparkle whenever he speaks about her.

"See Keith I always wanted to invest in hospital management. I wanted to be part of this world long time ago. So I saw an opportunity and took it. See if you don't like-"

"I love it, thank you so much. You don't know what you did. I have to tell everyone"

"No, not now. You are the only one I sent the mail. So wait for few days. Let my team approve and arrange a meeting" I informed..

"Oh okayyy.. Okayyy I can wait" He said like a kid.

"So tomorrow's session at 11am right"

"Yes.and thank you again" And cut the call

But te phone freeze in my ear when I heard a faint familiar voice.

No it can't be. No no not possible.

May be I am hallucinating due to working too much..

But even if it's hallucination, her voice was like a needle in my heart. For a second my hope rise to the point of no return.

I will have to work on myself more. I cannot just wait for a ghost knowing well it like making a castle in sand. I will have to heal myself and accept the reality.

The reality which she isn't a part of. The reality where she won't be reason for my existence.

I called the only person who will change my sour mood.

"Hello Dad, how are you feeling now"

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First of all Sorry for short update , try to update more frequent but I can't promise 🙂

Secondly thank you so much to the people who messaged me and supported me. Thank you for understanding my situation and still loving my book. You don't understand how much this means to me. After having exhausting day your comments and message are what made my day🥺💓💓💓

I thought of giving shout out to people who were my constant supporter. But I can't before you all give me consent. So if you are okay with it please tell me☺

Thank you and I love you 3000💓