Jaded

Returned

The second day was a blur of half-eaten meals and icy showers to try and bring back a sense of reality. He seriously couldn't believe it.

Why would they do this?

Why would The Waitress do this? What did she have to gain from it? She hadn't struck him as the type to chase her fifteen minutes of fame.

He couldn't wrap his head around it. And they still had another night to go. How the hell was he going to last another night, knowing that Jade and The Waitress were probably comparing notes.

He'd never lied to Jade about The Waitress. He'd cheated on her once . But... he suddenly realised that he hadn't exactly been one-hundred-percent honest about... afterwards .

Was that something he should've told her? Shit, shit . At the time, it seemed like a good idea to just... forget about her. He wanted to move forward with Jade, and he didn't need to know about the people she'd dated since they broke up. So why did she need to know about whether or not he kept seeing the Waitress?

Suresh took a deep breath, and lay his head back on the sun lounger, closing his eyes as he forced himself to stop making excuses.

He had lied to Jade by not telling her the full story, and now, he had to deal with the consequences. Another half-truth, another incomplete story, another reason for Jade's trust in him to be completely and irreparably shattered.

He furrowed his brow and clenched his fists, resolute.

If he got back, and Jade was still willing to talk to him, he would tell her the full and unreserved truth. If the rest of the country found out about it, then that was just an unfortunate consequence of his own actions.

And the most important part of that was recognising that he'd almost certainly hurt The Waitress in the process.

Gabi.

Hurt Gabi in the process.

The least he could do is call her by her fucking name.

Suresh knew she'd been interested in him. He knew he'd never told Gabi he had a girlfriend. And after Jade had left him... Gabi had been there.

He'd been furious to start with; screaming at her for sending Jade the video. But Gabi had stood there, in his trashed living room, and she'd glared at him.

"You don't get to fuck me and then just dump me like trash. You made your bed, now fucking lie in it."

He'd barely showered the next time she came over, his beard growing out and his hair unwashed, but Gabi banged his door down until he opened it. She'd pushed him into the shower. She'd cleaned up some of the broken glass strewn about the apartment. She'd put on a load of laundry for him, and she made him some toast.

She was there for him.

He hadn't told any of his family yet. Or his friends. Or his work colleagues. Gabi sent an email to Charlie on his behalf, telling him that Suresh was unwell and wouldn't be in to work for the week. She'd dragged him kicking and screaming through the first week of that breakup, and she didn't need to.

And then... she...

She'd forced him to go to bed, but he was lying there, cold. So fucking cold. No amount of blankets could warm the kind of cold he was. Cold of that kind only came from within, like an icy breeze that chills you right to the bone. He was desperate for the closeness, god, he missed Jade so much. He missed her fingers through his hair, her perfume on her pillow, the feeling of her skin under his hands, the way her body fit into his.