If we burn } Finnick Odair

Chapter 5 ~looking back~

Finnick's pov

I stand outside in the camera lighting in my face. "Are you ready?" Cressida asks. I nod.

"President Snow used to.....sell me....for my body, that is." I feel so shaky. I HAVE to do this. "I wasn't the only one. If a victor is considered desirable, the president give them as a reward or allows people to buy them for an exorbitant amount of money. If you refuse, he kills someone you love. So you do it."

This is really hard. I feel my hands shaking. You're doing this for Daphne Finnick for Daphne. 

"I wasn't the only one. Daphne and I were the most popular. Perhaps the most defenseless. Because the people we loved were so defenseless. To make themselves feel better my patrons at least would make presents of money or jewels but I already found a much more valuable form of payment...secrets."

I tell some of the ways I got the secrets. Betrayals, bottomless greed, bloody power players, drunken secrets whispered into pillows.

"And now onto our good President Coriolanus Snow. Such a young man when he rose to power. Such a clever one to keep it. How, you must ask yourself. Did he do it? One word that's all you really need to know. Poison."

I go through all this history. The cases of mysterious deaths. His allies that became threats. People dropping dead at a feast. He blamed it on some bad shellfish. Snow drinking from the poisoned cup himself to deflect suspicion. Antidotes don't always work. That's why he wears roses that reek of perfume. To cover up the scent of blood from the sores in his mouth that will never heal. Poison. The perfect weapon for a snake.

They keep the cameras rolling to the point I have to say cut. Haymitch walks over to me giving me a quick hug. "Proud of you kid." I give him a grateful smile. Keeping myself from choking up.

I walk inside pacing the floors. The hovercraft will land any moment now. "Finnick." A younger voice says. I turn to look at the young girl who said my name. It's Katniss's sister Prim. "They just landed." She says. I nod a 'thank you' to the kid before walking in a crowd of people.

I wish they'd move. The only ones who really need to be here are the people who have personal connections to the people getting off of those hovercrafts and the medical staff.

I look around for her. Come on where is she.

"Finnick!" I know that scream. I snap my head around in the direction of her voice. I smile with relief. She's alive. I take off running towards her and she runs towards me. As soon as our bodies clash I swoop her up in my arms keeping our foreheads together. "You're okay. You're safe now." Her legs are around me. I finally has some peace.

Daphne's pov

It were as if no other two people were in the room. I'm shaking in his arms or he's shaking holding me.

We kiss one another. Finnick and I have kissed billions of times now. I've never felt so much emotion and passion as I do right now. And that's truly saying something. I've always had this theory that if your lips mold perfectly together then you're soulmates. I still live by that. Finnick and I's lips have always been perfect for each other and we're perfect for each other. I don't want to be away from him again. EVER again.

"Daphne Elsher they still need to do an evaluation on you." A medic says. "I'm fine" I say. "It'll take 5 maybe 10 minutes tops if you're fine then you're free to go." I'm shocked. I thought I'd be stuck in a hospital and have to force my way out to find Finnick. "Okay deal as long as I don't have to stay in the hospital." "Of course." "Wait can Finnick come too?" The medic nods.

Finnick doesn't put me down until we get in the hospital room. He sits me down on the bed.

The medic checks my heart rate. Not surprised it's beating out of my chest I just seen Finnick for the first time in a month. My breathing a little shaky but other than that normal.

My weight I'm not looking forward to. I know I've lost a few pounds since before the games. Hopefully it's not too drastic.

"According to your chart it says you're under by 20 lbs. That's really not too bad as long as we get you the right kind of nutrients you'll be back to what you were in no time." I smile at the lady.

"Now I have to ask about these marks." She directs to my ankles legs arms and wrists. Burns bruises and cuts. "Oh they're fine really they're healing actually." "I'm concerned more about the burns more than anything." She hands some kind of cream to Finnick. "Once in the morning once at night starting tomorrow." She says.

"Do you think you'll be fine without being on morphling or in the hospital." "Yes, I'll be fine." I've always tried to refuse morphling. I know what it can do. I've seen what it can do. I don't want to rely on it.

"Okay then you're free to go but we will have to monitor you often and do weight check ins." "Okay yes that's fine thank you." "Of course."

Finnick picks me up again. "I can walk you know." I laugh. "You're also barefoot and this floor is cold." I relax into his hold.

When we get into the room he helps me shower off by washing my hair for me and my back. He gives me a clean outfit to change into.

"Is Mags here?" "Yes but she's already turned in for the night. We'll see her at breakfast."

We lay down in bed together for the first time in a month. We face one another just admiring each others features. I love him so much. He's just so perfect. I feel my eyelids grow heavy. He kisses my forehead gingerly. "You can sleep Pigeon. I'll be right here when you wake up. I'm not going anywhere this time." I smile moving closer to him. He puts his chin on top of my head holding me in his arms. His hand running up and down my back. I'm content what can I say. I drift off to sleep for now.

I'm back at the capital. I hear that faucet dripping and that door handle jiggling. The lines of capital men they had tormenting me. I hear Owen's voice. I smell Snow's blood. I hear Finnick yell my name. It's flooding back. It's all flooding back. "Daphne!" I realize Finnick's voice isn't just in my head. My eyes snap open making me realize I was just dreaming. Finnick's face is strictly concern.

"I'm sorry it was just a nightmare." I haven't said that in years. We stopped apologizing for nightmares long ago. "Why are you apologizing it's okay you know that." He says. His voice is calm and soothing. "Are you okay?" I nod tears running down my cheeks. "Yeah, yeah fine." "Daph." "Do you want to know what happened in the capital?" I have his full attention.

"They started off with questioning. Every time I lied they'd strike me. I don't know with what, but never told a singular truth. Then Jabberjay screams. Your screams. It got me. For a while. I screamed back for you. But I remembered Johanna telling me you were safe and in 13. Once I snapped at them they stopped that. They tried to prostitute me again. I said no. For the first time in my life I told that man no and I didn't fear what he'd do. I was proud of myself for a while. Until I woke up one morning in handcuffs. There was a man in my room who sounded EXACTLY like Owen. I know it wasn't really him but all I could think about was when I was in that arena for the first time. And he came back. Every. Single. Day. After Peeta warned you guys about the bomb Johanna and I were dragged away from the scene. They had me shackled to the ground all you could hear was the echo of your own breathing and the sound of a dripping faucet over and over...it'd make someone go mad. I hummed to block it out. The hanging tree stuck in my head. I began to hum it to see what they'd do. They didn't do a thing. I sung it then. As soon as I finished the last main verse the door opened. A new guy. Blonde hair this time. He was so annoying. I ended up getting myself out of hand shackles and punched him. It didn't do me much good. It didn't knock him out and I couldn't escape. But of course I got punished for punching him so I was given burns."

I look down at my arms examining the burns. The ones on my legs hidden by the blankets. I'm shocked I made it through that without crying. I know I want to I just don't have the strength for any more tears. I've cried enough.

Finnick pulls me to him not saying a word at first. His chin rests on my head his hands on my back. "I'm sorry." He says. "Daphne I'm so sorry." I shake my head pulling back from him. "Don't be. I'm okay now." Is that completely true? No, but I can't let him feel guilty. Besides none of this was ever his fault.

AN- I have such a huge attachment to their relationship. they're the best.