The Doctor (König x reader)

16 - a team

It has been about an hour or so since that whole ordeal with Graves. Ghost and I have been searching for Soap and König, radioing them every now and then with no answer. My worry grew more each time we tried radioing them, starting to think they were dead. There were multiple Shadows in the city, looking for us. We scoured through the buildings, looking for more weapons and equipment. I was lucky to find a good knife to use and a hand pistol. Even though I'm an awful shot, I will have it just in case. We were moving towards the church, and took out some Shadows on the way there.

We were currently in an abandoned house, trying to find anything useful. I saw some pictures of families with small children, making me reminisce about my childhood. As I hold the picture frame, my gaze drifts to the ring on my hand. Miss Anna's engagement ring. She had a family of her own, but I don't know what happened to them after her tragic death.

"What is it?" Ghost was suddenly behind me, making me drop the frame.
"Don't— why would you sneak up like that?! Jesus..."

He scoffs.

"You should be more on guard. What if I were an enemy soldier? You would've been dead."
"Yeah, yeah. I get it."

I pick up the picture and put it back on the shelf. I was feeling depressed, hopeless. What am I even doing here? What is the point?

"Let's go."

Ghost starts to walk out of the house but I stay. He notices and comes closer to me.

"Why the long face?"

I wish I had my mask right now.

"Nothing."

He looks at the picture I was previously staring at, starting to understand my sour mood.

"This is not the time to get nostalgic. We have to find Soap and König."

I feel my eyes burn. Oh, I am not about to cry right now, especially in front of Ghost. This gloomy atmosphere is not helping me at all. I hate being vulnerable around anyone, yet I can't stop myself from feeling this... guilt. I was the only one that survived, and Miss Anna's family had to continue their lives without her. I was a nobody, yet I was spared. I had no one, yet I was spared. This isn't fair. She should've been the one to survive.
Ghost notices my glossy eyes while I try to hide them. I was getting angrier by the second, angry at myself for not being able to stop these feelings.

"We really have to go."
"You can go first, I'll follow in a bit."
"No way. Splitting up is the crappiest thing we could do at this point."

I turn around and try to dry out the tears by fanning my face with my hand. Ghost sighs, frustrated.

"Listen," he puts his hand on my shoulder, turning me around to face him, "I don't know what your past was like but what matters right now is the present. And presently, we need to find our teammates and fix this mess. Are you ready to do that?"

I sniffle and nod.

"I'm sorry, I've just been... more sensitive tonight. It's the anniversary."
"Of what?"
"Miss Anna's death. I should've died that night..."

Ghost looked a bit surprised, but didn't pry.
He awkwardly patted my shoulder, not knowing how to respond.

"Don't beat yourself up, it won't change the past. People die from different causes all the time. What matters now is that you survive. Your team needs you."

While Ghost didn't cure my survivor's guilt, he did good at calming me down. This is the embarrassing moment that will keep me up at night.

After whatever that was, we continued our journey. Me and Ghost made some conversation. While he listened more than he spoke, he was still pleasant to talk to. Our conversation consisted of mostly small talk and strategy. Apparently he's a lowkey fan of sweets, and his favorite dessert is a strawberry Eton mess. According to him, it's easy and fast to make, which he likes. It took a lot to get that out of him. He even threatened to kill me if I tell anyone, and I believe him.