Break Fresh Ground

4: RECRUIT

Change is a constant, or so they say. But as I looked inward, I could feel something shifting within me, and I couldn't quite put my finger on what it was. The unknown changes made me feel uneasy and scared, like I was standing on the edge of a cliff, not knowing what lay ahead.

It had been a few weeks since the departmental assembly, and every time I remembered my actions that day, a wave of embarrassment washed over me. Why did I call her "déesse"? Her beauty was undeniable, but I too possessed a certain beauty, or so I thought. The thought made me question my own perception of beauty and self-worth.

What the heck is happening???

I've never questioned my own beauty before. I've always been confident in my appearance and never felt the need to change anything. But ever since I laid eyes on her, I couldn't shake off this feeling of insecurity. I wondered if I should go to the salon for a new haircut or visit a dermatologist, but my financial situation held me back.

In the quiet of the laboratory, I absentmindedly twirled a strand of my hair, trying to suppress my frustration. I wanted to let out my emotions, but I had to focus on the architectural visual technology laboratory class that was due at 5 o'clock in the afternoon. Malapit na akong matapos, actually. Bigla lang talagang pumasok sa isip ko si Artemis.

I tried my best to focus on finishing my work, and eventually, I was successful.

"You're finish na?" France asked, pouting. I nodded. "Agad? It's just quarter to four!"

"Stop complaining and focus on your plate, okay?" I spoke softly, trying to offer words of encouragement. She nodded, her pout still in place, but I could see a glint of determination in her eyes. I gently tapped her head in a reassuring manner before passing my plate to Professor Villegas for evaluation.

She evaluated my plate, her voice stern and her expression unreadable. But when she complimented my work, I could sense the genuineness in her words. I thanked her before stepping out of the room, knowing one of her strict rules was that once you're done, you can leave. But if she was not satisfied with the work, she would ask the student if they were satisfied with it. And the way she'll ask? Grabe! Mapapadalawang-isip ka talaga kung bakit itong kurso ang napili mo.

Outside the building, there were a few study sheds where I decided to wait for France. Paris and Ivy still had their last class. I was mindlessly scrolling through my phone when I felt a sudden sensation of being watched. I quickly scanned my surroundings, but there was no one there.

Hindi naman dating sementeryo ang university na ito, ano?

Binalik ko ang pagkakalikot ko sa phone ko.

"Hi," a sudden voice startled me, and I almost fell off my seat. "Oh, sorry for startling you," the person apologized. 

I grabbed my chest, my heart pounding wildly. "Not forgiven," I grumbled. 

"That's fine," she replied with a gentle smile. "Just breathe." She waited patiently while I regained my composure. Once I had calmed down, she spoke again, "I am here kasi naghahanap ako ng pwedeng isali sa organization namin."

"Network organization ba yan?" I joked.

"Joker ka pala?" Sarkastikong sabi niya. "'Di, joke lang. I really need someone to join our organization. Kasi sa sobrang busy no'ng mga nasa higher year, kaunti lang ang sumali. 'Yong ibang freshies naman, focus muna sa academics saka na lang daw kapag nakapag-adjust na sila."

"Magpapatulong ka bang maghanap?"

She grinned. "No. I want you to join our Performing Arts Collective."