yours [dnf] -discontinued-

20

(george's pov)

sadness is a pretty girl - the space ocean

i open my journal to write down my thoughts, i do this once a week to clear my head as my therapist recommended

dear diary,

im going to a party in 2 hours, i should be getting ready right now but i cant seem to get up. im in love with clay but i dont know how or when or why i should break it to him, so i started talking to aaron, a guy i met in new york, to distract myself from clay. my sister says i should confess to clay today, while being drunk or high, but im scared itll lead to something worse. clay is everything ive ever wanted and more; hes funny, caring, kind & hot as fuck. im actually considering confessing today but im scared of breaking aarons heart as well.

god, im a mess.

3/12/----

i close the journal, put it under my mattress and force myself to go get ready.

i call over gabriella to help me get ready since i might just lose my mind to the thought of going to a fucking party

"okay, what vibe are you going for?" gab asks

"i need to look good but not in a way to make clay horny," i say "i'm joking, i'm joking"

"how about.." she says reaching into my closet "ooh! how about a tight black shirt with brown zip up hoodie and black cargo shorts?"

i try to imagine that outfit in my head, it's basic but pretty

"i'll try it on," i say "grab it out for me"

(literally two minutes later)

"ayy, lookin' good there george" she says

"i like it," i say, looking at myself in the mirror "now help me with jewelry n' other shit"

"alrightyy" she says walking over to the jewelry box on my desk

she picks out a few silver necklaces and rings and hands them to me

"you gonna wear the bracelet clay gifted you?" she asks

"fuck yeah" i say, she nods and hands it over to me

"oh! and how about you change up the shoes a bit," she suggests "do you own brown converse?"

"i don't think so" i say

"here," she says leaning down to take off her shoes "borrow mine"

i smile and take them from her "thank you"

"of course," she says "can i do your hair as well?"

"the fuck you mean by do my hair?" i ask

"come on!" she says "trust me, i don't disappoint"

"okay, fine" i say

"stay here," she says "i'll go get my stuff"

i nod as she leaves my room

i open tiktok to scroll a bit

a few minutes later, she comes back with a box full of hair stuff

"what took you so long?" i ask, shutting off my phone

"pfft" she scoffs "shut up"

"hmm, no" i joke

"okay so," she says "your hair needs more volume"

----------------------------------------

"all done! what did you think?" she says

"woah"

my hair is now x10 more voluminous then it was before. it's smooth, shiny, droopy, and really pretty

"also, i found these earrings in my room, i think they'd look good on you" she says, holding up some earrings that i thought were crosses

"i'm not religious, though" i say

"this isn't the cross you idiot, it's the egyptian symbol of life" she says

"oh, right" i say taking them from her and putting them on

"wow, george. you look fucking perfect" she says

"oh shut up" i say

"here, have this" she hands me a tube of lip gloss "it'd look good on you"

"need'a have juicy lips for when he kisses me" i joke

"definitely" she laughs

"i'm ready!" i say

"do you need me to drive you there or do you have a ride?" she asks

"i may or may not have asked clay to come pick me up" i say, raising my eyebrows

"oh wow," she says "good job, pal" she says patting my shoulder "i'll be downstairs if you need me"

"alright!" i say as she leaves the room

i grab a pack of cigarettes and put them in my pocket with my airpods

i go over to my desk and out on some perfume for the finishing touches

a few minutes later, clay calls me and i answer

"hey george, i'm outside" he says

"i'll be right there!" i say before hanging up

i take a minute to look at myself in the mirror before heading off

i walk downstairs to see clay in the living room with gabriella, waiting for me

"oh my god, george, you look amazing" he says

"shut the fuck up," i say giving him a gentle punch on his shoulder "let's go"

"don't drink too much!" yells gab on my way out

i look at gab one last time before leaving, she winks at me and mouths the words “you've got this„

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A/N
this is getting exciting