Koda: Char! I thought you were dead!
Char: No, just in deep cover.
Koda: ...But it was an open casket.
Char: It was very deep.yes I skipped once upon a swap - I'm also gonna be skipping escape of the palisman and sense and insensitivity. My sincere apologies for depriving you of Sasha's return and also Steve but we'll get to them eventually, I promise
matty's the same bc matty is cool and his last name isn't tholomule, I will never accept that
3993 words
-
"Behold, the wonders of the human realm." Koda, now wearing a fancy paper crown that said president on it, picked up a red paper clip. "This little fella is one of their most valued objects. It aids in the compiling of printed wisdom, the scratching of gunk from under your nails and my favorite; it even mimics the sounds of the human ocean." He flicked it and it mimicked the sound of the human ocean, as we all know.
"Aah, the human realm! So beautiful!" He began walking back towards the chalkboard, with various human themed papers on it. "It's safe to say that the pay-per clorp is a stunning testament to human ingenuity. Any questions?"
We turn to the table that contained Mattholomule, Eileen, Bo and Goat Boy, who I will be calling Parker. Mattholomule raised his hand.
"Ah, our newest member! Mattholomule!"
"Dakoda, is this what the president of the Human Appreciation Society thinks passes as 'human artifacts'? Becuase at my old school-" Oh no, he's one of those. "We had real treasures." He cleared the table of the human stuff and place a bunch of rocks on the table.
"So real! I wanna touch them!" Bo said. "Go ahead. In my club, we didn't have any dumb rules." Matty said, much to the offense of the rule list. "Shh, he didn't mean that." Koda told the list and he then proceeded to snatch up the fake human artifacts. "Well, this isn't your club. Thankfully."
"Exactly. Who thinks I should be president?"
"I do!"
"Mattholomule for prez!"
"I'm an undecided voter. I wanna touch all the objects."
Koda lifted up a rock that had 'cellular phone' on it. "These are fakes!" He hath decreed. "You can't prove that!" Aha! Lying. Wonderful job, Matty. "You're just trying to distract these human appreciators. You're afraid of getting kicked out of office. It's your word versus mine."
"I don't know to believe in anymore."
"My faith in Koda has been broken!"
Koda backed up, into the chalkboard, against a certain newspaper about a certain demigirl. It was an amazing photo of void because all photos of them are amazing with a headline that read 'HUMAN SEEN ON THE BOILING ISLES'. "What if I brought in an expert?" Koda asked his club.
"Yeah, right." Mattholomule placed his hands on the table. "Yeah, right. Who can you find that's a bigger human expert than any of us?"
"How about a real human?"
"Why the secrets?"
"Show, don't tell, man!"
"Yeah, uh-huh." Mantholomule crossed his arms. "And you've never brought your friend here why?" Jokes on you, Matty, Koda has an excuse. "Well, she's busy. Void's got a job." He said. "But, I'll bring it in tomorrow. They'll prove I'm right."
"Sure you will, Dakoda. Sure you will."
-
Birdie house time. "Koda, I'd love to go to school with you, but I don't know how I can. Principal Bump banned me from Hexside." Char explained. "But nothing." Carmen said, rummaging through her box of junk to sell. "Bump did you a favor. There ain't nothing for you at that dweebus factory. No offense, dweebus."