Saving Stella - A Stellaride story

baby blues (21)

Kellys POV

my first shift back has just finished, I have arrived home, I open the door to my apartment and see Stella stood in the kitchen holding Toby who was feeding whilst with her free hand she is trying to make herself something to eat "Hey, your up early , how was he last night" I ask as I walk over to her and kiss the side of her head 

"your son, just doesn't like to sleep. he was up every 2 hours again, I dont think my milk is filling him, maybe we should try formula, as with him feeding so much its really painful also my nipples are constantly on fire" she says as she winces and drops the glass on the floor which smashes and I move her back from the glass as she starts to cry "hey its okay, we have plenty of glasses dont worry" I reassure her as I begin to clean the smashed glass up she moves over to the sofa as she pulls Toby of from her, who instantly starts to cry as he wasn't finished, she switches his sides so he can feed from her other nipple

"I have to swap him every so often as it's just so painful, so that might not be helping" I hear her say as she looks at Toby and I come over to her with a fresh coffee for her and she takes it off me "how about I go to the pharmacy and get you some cream, and also ask about what is the best formula and we can try him on that see how he goes" I say trying my best to help. to which she smiles and nods "please, that would be a great help"  I smile at her as I stroke her hair 

"when hes done, pass him to me and you go get some sleep, ill take him out with me to give you a break as thinking about it you haven't had one since hes been born" I say as she looks at me and gives me a thankful smile before drinking her drink.

...

I arrive at the block where the pharmacy is, i park in a nearby car spot, and I take Toby's stroller out the trunk I put it up and then connect his car seat to it.

"right little man lets go" I say as he looks up at me and smiles, my heart bursts as I've never seen him smile before as I start walking to the pharmacy.

Once ive finished at the pharmacy I take a look inside a few more shops where I buy toby a few new outfits and also a gift for Stella to remind her shes doing an amazing job, and to let her know how much I appreciate her.  I decided to get her a letter T necklace with Toby's birthstone attached along with his birth date. 

once I got that I decided to stop by a florist and get her some flowers before heading back to the car.  once we arrived back at the apartment, Stella was asleep on the couch so I quietly placed Toby on his play mat and started to make him a bottle using the formula the pharmacy recommended. once I had finished making it, Toby started to kick up a fuss which woke up Stella. 

"hey dont worry, i've got him, Im gonna try him on bottle" I say as I walk over with the bottle that was now ready and picked Toby up as Stella laid back down, I sat on the chair with Toby as I placed the bottle to his mouth and he started sucking straight away. 

once he had finished his bottle I went to change him and then laid him in his cot, as he went to sleep straight away. 

I walked out of his room as stella looked at me "so far so good" she said as I smiled before placing the monitor on the table infront of the couch. 

"did you have a nice sleep, looked like you needed it" I asked as she moved her feet so I could sit with her "yes, It was very much needed" she said as I started to rub her feet "oh i almost forgot I got you something whilst I was out" I said getting up again to grab the flowers and gift bag from the kitchen side and handing them to stella

"aww Kelly, there beautiful, they smell lush" she says as she smells them she places them on the table as she begins to open the gift bag, she pulls out the box and smiles as she opens it "Kelly, This is gorgeous, thank you" she says as she crawls over to me and kisses me "I just wanted to get you something to show you how much I appreciate you, you deserve the world" I say as I kiss her again "want me to put it on for you" I ask as she nods and turns her body round so I can place it round her neck, once I've clasped it together I kiss her back and wrap my arms round her. "I love you" I say as I rest my head on her shoulder as I see her playing with the charms on the necklace.  "I love you too" she says as she looks at me and I kiss her once more. 

...

we decided to put on a film as we cuddled on the couch, embraced in each other's arms. it was only when the film finished that we realised Toby hasnt woken up, so Kelly goes to check on him "hes okay, hes still asleep, that formula may be working, he really was just a hungry baby, definitely takes after his dad, I love my food" I joke as I come back over to Stella who immediately places her head on my legs as I stroke her hair.

"Thankyou" I hear from Stella as I look down at her she looks up at me. 

"what are you saying thankyou for" I laugh a little

"you, youre amazing, I dont know how I got so lucky. you always know what to do and say to make me feel better, and truth be told this last week I have been struggling, ive been putting it off as tiredness but I know its more than that and I dont know what to do" she says as tears fall from her eyes 

"hey come on, its okay to be sad, you have just had a baby your hormones are obviously going to be all over the place, but I am here for you any time, day or night, at home or at work, if you need me, nothing is ever to little or too much, you call or text me and Ill be here in record time" I say as I wipe away her tears

"Kelly, I dont think its just my hormones" she pauses as it looks like she doesn't want to admit it "I think I might have what they call baby blues, also known as Postnatal depression"  she continues as she sits up and looks at me and I take a hold of her hands 

"that is nothing to be ashamed of, it is very common...look tomorrow, we will book in to to see a therapist so we can get you the right help, and I will be with you every step of the way" I say as I hold her face as she nods and I pull her in for a kiss. 

"dont you ever forget, you've got this Stella Kidd"