LTM- OneShot

Ruins

It was dark and everything smelled like blood. She could feel a familiar presence hovering above her but it grew stronger as she felt a manly hand caressing her thighs through her short satin dress. The caress grew stronger and bolder, all the way from her body to her neck. Her legs constricted with desire. The hands knew their path to her body. The touch on her neck grew bolder as he began to choke her delicately and she started gagging after a euphoric chuckle.
One hand began to slip her dress off the shoulder while the other put pressure on her petite neck. The diamond necklace he hadn't taken off since he specifically asked her to, scraped her skin but she wasn't complaining. The gagging felt fun until the same hands changed their course and the teasing caress turned into a vicious strangle. He wasn't just choking her for fun anymore. Her moans stuck in her throat and her eyes opened in fear. She stared back in those green mesmerizing eyes that reflected back anger in contrast to the passion and love she was used to seeing before.
Serkan Bolat was murdering Eda Yildiz in their bed.
Eda rubbed the heel of her foot onto the olive sheets, struggling to pull away from his strong hand from her neck. But in vain. Serkan remained unaffected. He lifted himself from her half-naked body by a few inches and supported himself on the other hand that was groping her butt before. His thick fingers that were used to shower caresses on her delicate skin and thrust inside her like a volcano were now strangling all with all might. He constricted them around with so much power and force and not even Eda's angels could've done something for her. Tears trickled through her eyes and she tried to scream in fear but words weren't coming out of her mouth. She wanted to plead but it seemed that she lost her voice. She thought staring him in his eyes would make him have mercy on her but she couldn't recognize this man, who was making love to her a few hours back and now he was about to murder her, right there in those olive sheets that she got him as a birthday present.
Slowly and gradually, she felt darkness covering her eyes and simultaneously a flash of light approaching her. Maybe it was the angel of death. Her hand that was trying to free herself from the strangle began to lose its strength and she knew she was dying.
A silent cry escaped her lips and she felt something running down her thighs. It was urine. Eda tried to free herself and suddenly her eyes flew open.
It was a dream.
It took good sixty seconds for her to register that it had been a dream. She was in those olive silk sheets wearing the same dress and it was her and Serkan's bed indeed. The only difference was he wasn't there to kill her or wish her a good morning like he always did. It also clicked with Eda that she was close to actually urinating in bed and her bladder was full. She rushed to the bathroom to empty her bladder still thinking about the dream she had. It felt too real. Shivers went down her spine replaying the scene in her head and to wear off the images, she pushed herself into the shower, allowing the cool water droplets to take away those harsh images.
.
He had never experienced pain in life. What he felt when his mother died that day was not stronger than this. He gulped another glass of whiskey remembering that day and the void it left in his heart. But would that help him to forget this? He was wearing his favorite white crisp shirt and blue pants. He was looking painfully handsome but haggard. His masculine body felt weaker than ever and he could not think straight. He thought that sitting in front of his mother's piano would help him but the memories only added salt to his injuries.
He had forgotten those melodious tunes, in fact, he had never mastered them, to begin with, but still today, he felt like playing them again even though he could not do justice. His fingers ran through the piano keys, trying to remember how his mother did it back then. It was a long time and his memory was weak in this regard. Or maybe that's what he was telling himself. He was failing at recalling his mother's fingers pressing on these keys. Maybe he was out of practice? Or maybe the melody wasn't coming out of his heart.
'Serkan honey, melodies always come out from here, not your fingers.' His mother would tell him by placing a hand on his heart when he used to get angry for being unable to play it like her. He would cry then and he was crying today just like that. Tears never escaped his eyes easily but his insides screamed with agitation. He was in a similar position today. He wanted to cry, but he was unable to. His eyes were bloodshot red and you could see the veins through them. His face was as pale as death and his lips had turned white. There was anger brewing in his chest but it was slowly taking over the anguish. He feared that the intensity of this anguish would be too lethal for him to bear.
'I am not strong Anne, I am not.' He mumbled a tiny cry like a baby. His lips curled into a pout and he wished for his mother's lap more than ever he had done in the last couple of years.
His fingers didn't stop despite the atrocious music coming out of the instrument. His mother would have banished him to even come near it if he played this in front of her. But he didn't stop. He didn't know whether it was the brewing anguish or boiling anger that was being channeled through the horrible music.
His strokes on the keys grew stronger and stronger and he didn't stop until he felt a pair of familiar lips on the back of his neck. Exactly at the spot that made him go weak in knees and hard between the legs. The touch was soft like ever and her soothing fragrance instantly reached his nostrils. He was amazed, he didn't feel her presence like always. She ran her hands on his shoulders and began to massage them with her expert hands. Her lips teased his ear and placed a bite on the earlobe after letting out a sultry, 'You are terrible at this. Lemme show you how it's done.'
Eda came around her sat beside him confidently. She ran her fingers expertly on the keys and to his surprise, the melodious tune was familiar. His mother played it too for him back then. It wasn't exactly the same but quite similar to what she used to play for him on his insistence. Serkan was shocked but his face didn't show any emotions.
'I didn't know you play.' She was curious because she had never seen him around this instrument except for when he was using it to fuck her.
'My mother did.' He replied curtly and Eda looked at him in shock. He had never mentioned his family or even his mother before. This felt intimate and her fingers immediately stopped at the confession. She lifted her gaze to look at him closely and the sight twisted her intestines and she felt the familiar choking feeling as she did in her dream. His eyes were exactly the same as in her dream. Still and Cold. They weren't staring back with passion or love. Eda knew that Serkan could feel the goosebumps on her bare skin that was complimenting her satin dress, the exact one she wore in her dream. She tried to speak but a hoarse cry could be heard instead of some words.
It felt like someone was choking her already and Eda wished someone would open the windows because she couldn't breathe. She shivered when he ran his thumb from her arm to the sharp jaw of her face. It was a delicate but firm stroke that did not feel familiar. He repeated the same movements on her plump lips and asked her in a grave whisper,
'Would you visit my grave if I died?'
'I'd die before you were ever in a grave Serkan.' He wasn't anticipating any reply and Eda was surprised that the words left her heart the moment he asked the question.
Serkan let out a chuckle and Eda wondered if he was taunting her or himself.
He looked at her in the eyes bitterly, his teeth pinching his cheeks and the cold gaze was enough to torment Eda's soul within seconds. Serkan closed the little bit of distance between themselves and grabbed her wrist from one hand and the other pulled her from the back of his neck. He pressed his forehead with hers and dug his fingernails into her skin. Eda didn't whimper in pain but she wanted him to say something. The fear of unsaid words lingered above their heads.
'You should've engraved your name on the bullet. Not Mine.' He let out bitterly with closed eyes. Eda widened her eyes but he didn't allow her to fidget at all. His hold grew stronger and painful but Eda didn't complain.
'It would be better to have your name buried in my heart.' He continued with a raspy tone and felt Eda's tears falling on his lips.
'Don't you dare.' He pushed her and roughly took the sides of her mouth in his fist. His nails dug cruelly and he looked at her with vengeance. Eda took heavy breaths when he pulled her head by taking a fist of her hair in his hand and other pressed her arm on the back.
'What am I gonna do with you Eda Yildiz?'
'Serkan..' She let out a cry but she didn't know herself what was she going to say to him.
He straightened themselves in the same position and dragged Eda to the center of the hall, the same place where they had sex for the first time. He pushed her ruthlessly and Eda stumbled on her feet and fell down. It didn't hurt her but he felt the pain bigger than the one he could feel inside his chest.
He approached her and violently made her stand on her feet.
'So, how it felt? Making a fool of me all this time but it's sad. Your daddy Yildiz always thought you were smarter but guess, even the best of players leave behind marks to follow by their enemies.'
'You killed him.' Something changed in her eyes when he took her father's name. Serkan saw her eyes and they weren't crying anymore. There was fair accusation in them, determination and firmness.
'Is that so? So why haven't you killed me yet?' The words weakened Eda's strong composure and at that moment she wanted to rush in his arms and kiss him wildly without any inhibitions.
Serkan closed their distance with three steps and took out a familiar gun from his back. Eda stared at it.

'Daddy Yildiz never taught you to keep good care of your belongings?' He taunted and continued with a disgusting, 'Oh, I think he died before even telling you that.'
Eda didn't know what entered her but she thrashed a tight slap across his face. 'Don't you dare talk about my dad like that. He was innocent and you killed him.'
'And you thought sleeping with his murderer would do his soul good.'
Eda had always imagined a time like this in their lives. She knew one day the truth of her identity would be out. She knew she won't be able to take this charade longer. But she also imagined him saying that he didn't do it. She told herself that the Serkan she knew won't harm anyone or even her dad. She wanted to believe he was innocent and had been quite successful in conforming herself to that truth.
'So you are not denying that?' She asked him with tears, he could clearly sense that pleading in her tone. Begging him to lie and let her live in this bubble.
'I am not.' Those three words shattered Eda more than anything and a sob escaped her lips. She began to slap him on his face and chest. Her hands were violent but she could feel powerless. Her hands were scared of hurting him. He wasn't stopping her from hurting him. Why wasn't he stopping her? Eda's sobs turned into cries but she didn't stop with her violent attack that was too subtle to describe.
'Lie to me, please.' She begged him crying and wailing in his arms.
'There's nothing to lie Eda.'
'Lie to me and say that you are responsible for father and Burcu's death.'

She waited for him to say something but he didn't reply. Her shoulders sagged and she looked at him like a defeated soldier who was exhausted after a lost war and was waiting for the opponent army to behead him right there.
Serkan pulled Eda and handed over the gun in her hand.

'Do it.' He looked at her firmly without any doubt reflecting in his eye.
'I said fucking DO IT. Kill me the way you have imagined it all this time.'

Eda shook in fear and her hands began to tremble. She looked at him as if he was asking her to jump into the fire but that would have been easier than this. He pulled his hand that held the gun to his forehead but then clicked his tongue and shifted its position to his heart.
'Do it. FIRE' He screamed and she screamed back an intense 'HAYIR. I can't.'

'I can't. I can't. I love you,' She was crying and admitting her feelings like a child who was left with no choice.
Serkan didn't let go and instead, his fingers covered hers on the trigger. 'You don't have to fall in love with enemy Eda. That's against the rules.'

He was pushing her to pull the trigger and Eda knew if she felt weak and allowed him to pull it, he would die.
They struggled with the gun but Serkan's hold was stronger and then, Eda heard the worse sound ever. A gunshot.

Blood spilled but she was unable to see it. She could feel a piercing pain, she looked at Serkan completely stunned and petrified. Her hand reached the aching part of her body. It was only after touching her shoulder, she felt the blood.
He was safe. The first thought that crossed Eda's mind was that the ruthless criminal who killed her family was safe. She didn't know who pulled the trigger but she could only see her dream replaying in front of her. Serkan's hands cradled her face and held her body from falling down. She felt good in his arms. His touch was still magical and comforting and it was taking over the pain of the bullets.

Her eyes drooped close and the last thing she heard was a woman's voice. Familiar again. It was approaching close. Her eyes were drooping close but she wanted to look at that woman, she wanted to believe her ears. She wanted to see for herself.

The last thing she felt was a pair of lips pressing on her. She was struggling with oxygen but she knew he had sucked her lower lip in the most delicate way ever. Her heart cried and winced in pain. If only. If only you had lied to Serkan. If only we had met at different times.
Maybe he heard it too and the last thing she heard him saying was 'if only'.

End

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