As much as you want [Chishiya x Reader]

Chapter 12 - I'd love it if we made it

And I'd love it if we made it.

You came out of the toilet, toothbrush still in your hand, to find Kuina in the room and Chishiya looking at you with an apologetic look on his face, but a smile dancing on his lips indicated how funny he found the whole situation.

There would be no kissing then.

You didn't feel particularly disappointed. He had wanted to kiss you. He had said so himself. Not like actually said so himself, but you had decided what his intentions were already while you were in the toilet, and therefore, knew the kiss would come sooner or later. Oh, let it be sooner.

 Kuina was telling you that she had seen Arisu and Usagi asking questions around The Beach, trying to learn more about the Borderlands - what was it like in other areas, if there were any game arenas outside of Tokyo or if anyone had tried to escape, maybe by sea, using a boat? 

You had asked yourself those questions a million times over, but hadn't shared those thoughts with anyone. Not even with Chishiya. You preferred receiving no answer whatsoever. Sometimes uncertainty was better.

Chishiya listened, intently, and then stood up. "Come on. I want to be there when they find the disposal container."

The disposal container was where the militants would dump the bodies of the so-called "traitors". You had learned about it when Chishiya first told you about his plan of stealing the cards, but had never seen it, until that day.

You covered your nose with your hand, the smell of rotting bodies so pungent it almost brought tears to your eyes. And found it sad, that the strength of the smell was what made you almost cry, and not the people whose bodies were there. Just laying on top of one another. As if they did not matter, at all. The death of others was no longer something you were sensitive to. You felt miserable.

Arisu, who had been the one to lift the tarpaulin covering the container, seemed horrified. You envied him. 

"That is the true nature of this utopia." Chishiya's voice interrupted your train of thought. "This is part of the rules."

"Death to the traitors." You whispered, and he nodded affirmatively in your direction, Arisu's eyes going from him to you.

"Come, we should talk." Chishiya turned around and started walking, sure that Arisu would follow. And he did. So did Kuina and you, without looking back at the dozens of dead bodies. Again, not because their sight filled you with horror, or sorrow. But because you couldn't stand the apathy. 

You were on The Beach's rooftop soon enough. 

"Arisu, both Usagi and you have collected a vast amount of information. What are you planning?" Chishiya said. No point beating around the bush, was there? Seeing the black-haired man was not really up for collaborating, he continued. "I'll cut to the chase. How will you live in this world, that's full of despair?" He was not looking at Arisu when he said those words, but at you.