I look in the mirror dressed in a pair of dress pants and a nice blouse accompanied by matching heels. I brace myself for what possibly could be the worst or best day of my life depending on the outcome. My hair is done my makeup water proof. I take a deep breath and get into the car with James. He had decided coming for moral support which I needed more than anything.
We get to the court building and I begin to feel nauseous knowing that my child's life was being decided for him. I'm not traditionally a very religious person but I pray to whoever is up there that I get some rights to my baby.
I walk though the door and see my baby boy next to Taye. when he notices me he runs after me. "Mommy, I missed you," he cries leaping into my arms
"I missed you too," I coo rocking him back and forth. "I don't want you to ever leave again,"
"I don't want to ever leave you again," he sweetly he mumbles into my shoulder
I sat him in my lap as we began the hearing. Taye and I both solemnly swear to tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth and all that Jazz and we officially begin.
Taye and I both share our side f the story neither of us completely lied even though Taye left out minor details that would make him look worse in the eyes of the Judge. Based on all the factual evidence with Taye having a history of alcoholism, violent and abusive tendencies and so on I begin to grow confident that I'll win and have my baby back whether it be full on or just partial custody.
The judge bangs his gavel signaling that a verdict has been reached "The courts have decided to award Mr. Diggs full custody of Walker for 6 months time if he can prove himself a capable father then he will be awarded full custody until Walker is old enough to make his own decision," He states
My stomach heart and all other internal organs drop to the floor my hands begin shaking with fury, It really is true that my baby was no longer my baby and I feel so small and helpless James takes my hand and squeezes it reassuringly. I doesn't work I feel a ball of emotions and numbness at the same time.
"Your honor," I ask "Will I at least have visitation rights?"
"By law yes," he says I feel my spirits rise. "However, it also is up to the father as we by order of law cannot oversee whether certain rights are upheld ," my eyes become tear filed I can't believe that this is actually happening. "Case dismissed," he says banging his gavel.
After we both sign off the papers that legally terminated my parental rights , which makes this even more real knowing I have no control over my own flesh and blood I sit back down with James he begins consoles me. Taye walks over to me with a sly grin "You weren't going to win, you were never going to win and you are never going to win, you're nothing but a pathetic loser," he hisses
"Don't Talk to my girlfriend that way, don't you see you've already caused her enough pain y-you monster!" James says back to him.
"Oh look how sweet Prince Charming coming into save the day, for his damsel in distress," Taye chimes evilly.
"Please James I can handle this," I say tears falling down my cheeks. "please don't get yourself in trouble for me,"
"Well me and MY son are going home to celebrate the occasion,have a nice life idina." It feels as though a bullet has been shot through my heart when He says that Walker is his son.
James and I walk out of the court room and into the car tears are still streaming down my face. We take off to the apartment. "Dee it's going to be okay we'll get him back just wait and see," He Soothes rubbing slow circles on my hand with his thumb.
"James I don't think I can do this anymore," I say
"Do what," He asks
"I can't date you anymore," I nervously sputter.
"Why," He asks sadly
"Everything I love I always ruin," I state "My relationship with Taye, My child's life, I don't want you to get hurt by me too, besides you deserve so much better than me I'm so pathetic, stupid and weak,"
"Dee you haven't done a thing to destroying anyone of those things, that was Taye, he's just trying to make you believe that it's your fault because he's got nothing better to do with his time he's the destroyer, you're not pathetic or weak you're so strong for going through this and one day when you get to see your son again you'll have that much better if a story to tell don't give up on yourself and our son," he says I'm surprised when pretty much says that he thinks of Walker as his son as well.
"James I love you so much i just can't hurt anyone anymore and I don't want to be hurt again," I explain
"Idina I'll never hurt you the way Taye has I promise I love you so much and hate seeing you like this," He says
"James I just can't do this I love you too much to see you hurt by me," I respond choking back the tears
James and I exchange a glance. I love the man with everything I have and if he were to be hurt by me then I couldn't look at myself in the mirror again. "I'll never give up on us promise me you won't give up on us either I love you,"
After a few moments more of contemplation,webpull into the parking section of the complex and I've made my decision that not being with him would hurt him more than me not trying. "James I didn't mean what I said I was upset and I couldn't look at myself. In the mirror again if I gave up on you," he turns his head and shoots me his thousand dollar smile.
"Your beautiful even when you're crying,"he points out wiping a tear from under my eye. "I love you so much ." he whispers
"James I love you more." I joke through the tears
"I love you most," he responds kissing my forehead lovingly.
Authors note: I hope you enjoyed this chapter it was hard for me to write but I did it. Please give me suggestions for future echo ayers I want to get you all more involved because this is just as much your story as it is mine. I love you all 😘
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Jadina: A love story
CasualeA jadina fic very similar to the one I've been writing but had to delete because it was distracting me way too much from school and stuff. Same concept as the last story I lowered Idinas age for the purpose of the story of you read my last story you...
