Just Another Secret.

Chapter 81

Keisha

The second I walk through that door all I see is Pops staring at the dress from his seat on the couch.

"Hey," I greet him.

He doesn't respond. He's drinking something amber out of a glass and he's just looking at the dress.

"Pops?"

Nothing.

Marilyn gets down here. She smells like she just got out of the shower. "Doctor Kumar go get ready for bed, I told you to put the glass away."

He walks away with the glass.

"What was that about?" I ask her.

She sighs and leans her hand on her hand. "He has regrets. We all do, but some days are harder than others. He loves that we have you now, although, he sees your prom dress and he thinks he missed so much of your life. Yeah, he kinda watched from a digital distance but you being here makes it so different."

I take a seat. "Can I ask you why Jude? Why not your siblings or his parents? Or random adoption?"

"Adoption was out of the question. We wanted to know who was taking care of you. And honestly. Keithan didn't really think of family, plus there was a lot going on with our families and giving you to one of them was just not the right choice. I guess he knew about Jude's situation and you were a way to save her from her emotional suffering. And a way for him to not feel guilty with our family, but be able to see your life pretending everything was fine."

"Why didn't you—never mind." I shake my head. She wouldn't have been mentally, physically, or emotionally stable enough to contribute to any decision.

"Relationships are hard. When I was at a good place physically. I was at a horrible place mentally. Postpartum is one thing. But when it goes on for months—years even, and it develops into a severe depression, you tend to break down and let your partner see the worst sides of you. You were still a baby. I begged Keithan to bring you back. I screamed I cried. He was the only close person I could talk to about it because no one knew about you. Seeing Amia as a baby killed me inside.

"Keithan went to Jude. He just wanted to talk. She had a full blown fake panic attack. August told him to never come back. To never come near his family again. He was holding you and Bryson in his arms. The way he described it you were so tiny but smiling trying to take his hat off. We've always known August to being a kind man. Jude wouldn't even look at him as August spoke. Keithan got the door slammed in his face."

"So me getting ready for prom—"

"It hits hard because he wasn't there for other milestones."

I nod then race upstairs.

I knock on his door. He hums and opens it. I just hug him. No words. Just a hug.

He stumbles back a bit but keeps his footing.

It doesn't take long for him to break down a bit and hug me back.

He whispers so quietly I wouldn't have heard him if we weren't so close. "I should've never gave you away. I should've toughed it out. I'm so sorry, Keisha. I'm so sorry I didn't fight harder."