The Heart Exchange (bnha agere)

Chapter 5: Anger Issues

Cws: involuntary regression kinda
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It's class time, and Bakugo could not feel worse. Not only do they have a positively searing headache, but they lost their favourite pen. To anybody else, that'd be insignificant, but to Katsuki, it was a decent reason to hate everyone in the room with him. Well, maybe not Eijirou. Except, Katsuki had been avoiding his boyfriend the past couple of days, fearing the worst, despite Kirishima refraining from mentioning any of his suspiciously misspelt, and out of character texts. It should have made them feel better, but it heightened their paranoia. Kirishima wasn't an idiot, and it was only a matter of time before he figured it all out. And that wouldn't just be the end of their relationship, but the end of Katsuki's reputation.

  "Bakugo, pay attention." Mr Aizawa orders. Katsuki wrinkles his nose. He did not feel like paying attention when he was in dire need of some paracetamol. They rolled their eyes at him, and scoffed.
  "I'll pay attention when you stop jabbering on about meaningless shit."
  Mr Aizawa's face hardened. Katsuki was highly aware of what he'd just started, but it still hurt when Mr Aizawa raised his voice.
  "Do not swear in my classroom. You will speak respectfully." He growls, sending his student a "done-with-your-bs-now-shut-up" look, before turning his attention back to the board. Katsuki shakes his head and tries to avoid spacing out. The pain from his head, combined with Mr Aizawa's commands, made them hot with irritation.

  They could sense Kirishima's eyes drifting over them. It didn't provide them with much comfort.
  "I am speakin' respectfully." They snapped back, leaning back in their chair, and chewing on their pencil. The frustration was working its way around his head and forcing in that awkward childishness.
  "Bakugo!" Mr Aizawa spun around. He looked seriously angry now. "Enough with that tone, or you can get out of my class." Bakugo bit down hard on his pencil, and smacked it down on the desk.
"Good!" He spat, springing from his seat. "I don't want to be in your stupid shitty class!" He cries. Mr Aizawa's eyes flared with fury. He wasn't expecting it to escalate this far, but now Katsuki's storming out of classroom.

  Bakugo flings open the door, and thunders down the hallway, wringing his hands over and over again. The anger flames inside of him like an out of control forest fire. Yet, beneath it, he's completely terrified of what's happening to him. Footsteps resound from behind, and for a moment, Katsuki thinks he might actually vomit.
  "Hey, what's wrong?" Kirishima's voice is low, and calm. He doesn't sound angry like Mr Aizawa. Bakugo keeps walking, balling his hands into fists, and sucking the tears back in before they have any chance of escaping. Everything is shit.
  "Come on, Bakugo. Please, just let me help." Eijirou catches up. He slings a hand round his boyfriend's waist, attempting to draw them to a stop. Katsuki wriggles away. "I know you haven't been feeling good lately, like, at all. And I just want to help, but it feels like you want to push me away. That's called self-sabotage, Bakugo." Eijirou softly explains. Katsuki wheels around. Mr Aizawa is following them, rubbing his temple, and looking all round exasperated.
 
  "Kiri, I don't need help!" Bakugo hisses back. Eijirou frowns as they stamp their foot. "Leave me alone, okay?"
  Mr Aizawa comes to a halt.
  "Kirishima, go back to class please. I'll talk to Bakugo." He says. Eijirou grimaces, taking his boyfriend's hand, giving it a tight, reassuring squeeze before retreating back to lesson. Katsuki crossed his arms and faced the wall. Mr Aizawa was just going yell and shout at him and he didn't want to hear it. He didn't want to cry.
  "Okay, now, Bakugo." Mr Aizawa sighs. "I think we need to have a little chat." Katsuki's shoulders bunch. That can only mean bad, bad things. He shakes his head, still facing the wall.
  "Don't want to." He mutters. Aizawa leans against the wall. His face has settled back to neutrality.

  "Well, I do. I know you have quite the temper, but you don't often take things that far." Mr Aizawa continues despite Katsuki's protest. "You know that as your teacher, I'm here for you when you need me, right?"
  Bakugo's fingers linger around his lips.
  "Yeah." He replies, dejected. Mr Aizawa let's out another sigh, longer than the last.
  "So, are you going to tell me what's going on in your head lately?" He asks. He places one of his large hands on the boy's shoulder. They shrink against his touch.
  "No. I'm just… Just a bad day." Katsuki hangs their head, stuffing their fists into their pockets. Mr Aizawa's hand slips away.
  "Alright, don't hesitate to come to me or another teacher for help." Bakugo finally turns around, and their eyes meet. There's nothing but sympathy in his teacher's eyes now, and it makes Katsuki feel even more weak and helpless.
  "There are a lot of people who care about you, Bakugo." Mr Aizawa states. "You can have a bit of time out of class if you need to calm down some more." And with that, Mr Aizawa walks back down the hallway, leaving Katsuki alone. The boy pushes his back against the wall, and wraps their arms around themselves. Maybe they should have caved and asked Kirishima for a hug. They stick their fingers in their mouth, and stare down at their shoes, apprehensive to return to class; to face everyone who witnessed their huff.

  He strolls down the hallways, peering into classrooms. The school has an entirely different atmosphere when it's quiet like this. He stumbles back in the direction of his class, chewing mindlessly on his fingers. He should probably apologise to Kirishima for his recent snippy commentary, but apologising for stuff is hard. Mr Aizawa glances at Bakugo as he re-enters the room, wiping his wet fingers on his school trousers, and plonking down in his seat again. Eijirou's eyes are planted on his work, and he doesn't even give a quick glance when Katsuki sits down. It rattles the blonde, filling him with a heavy unease. They'd messed it all up, and now Eijirou was pissed - pissed with them.
  Bakugo crossed his arms, and glared into his lap for the rest of the lesson. He forced anger in front of sadness so he wouldn't cry. But it didn't prevent his insides from knotting, and keeping him in a child-like limbo state that made everything difficult. He'd have to work out the junk with Kiri later, when he didn't feel like napping at his desk, or sucking on his thumb.
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