SECRECTS I CAN'T KEEP FOREVER - eremika -

15: 21:29 (This Is For You)

The same night that Jean asked me out everyone quickly went to bed and stopped playing their games. The next morning Hange and Levi left early in the morning to head home. We still have a few more days until we go back home. Though Armin begged Annie to stay, she states on how she wanted to sleep in the basement... So she did.

THIS NIGHT-

I was putting on my clothes while Sasha started talking to me.

"Jean, huh? Even after the whole Eren thing..."

"I know Sasha but, honestly i don't think that he even likes me. I feel like he might just be using me for his pleasure." We started having a small argument.

"Mikasa! Are you fucking blind?!! You know how much Eren likes you?! So fucking much... As soon as he heard about you and Jean I saw him walking to his room with tears on his face. You messed up Kasa." I know she's right but i've already committed. Jean would be too upset If I told him I didn't want to go anymore. He is too happy for his own sake.

"You sound just like Eren." I pronounced his name with a hard N.

I walked out of the room and hopped in the car with Jean.

"Hey Mikasa! Are you excited?!"

No. no not really.

"Yeah, yes I am."

As we went into a fancy restaurant that Jean picked, I grew even sadder. The dinning was the nicest I've ever seen but it continued to make me sad by each step inside.We sat down in awkward conversation for about 40 minutes.

"Mikasa, can I just say something?" No.

"Yeah?"

"It's turning into sunset. You wanna pay the bill and dip?"

"Sure!"

I really don't want this...

BACK TO EREN IN THIS EXACT MOMENT-

I walked outside to watch the sunset. Thinking about her... constantly, always. I can't ever stay upset at her, though i know she went on that date with Jean I still love her so much. I want her so bad. I need her right now.

I decided that the sunset was my only company that I needed right now. I love Mikasa but I know that she doesn't love me... she likes Jean and there is nothing I can do about it. What's wrong with me? I should be happy that Mikasa is happy.

Tears started falling down from my face knowing that me and Mikasa would never be a thing again. When I was watching her and Jean leave I noticed a bright smile on his face. Mikasa would want to be with him, he's not a loser... like me. He is always kind, unlike me. Why can't I be him. Why can't I be Jean?! It's not fair. I want Mikasa. I need her, she's so beautiful and kind... I just wish I could be the one on that date right now.

Just as I realized that I was talking out loud Sasha came outside.

"I tried to tell her, she still thought that you didn't like her. But I think she knows deep down that you guys are meant to be." She gave me a face I'd never seen her make before. Though she talked like she knew me and my emotions so well.

From Sasha's words I started crying harder than before.

"I just wish that–"

Sasha finished my sentence. "–she could be here with you right now."

I nodded my head towards Sasha. Though she continued talking.

"Welp Eren, they're gonna be back in a few.. I already checked their location."

"Okay..." I was in the middle of getting up but something stopped me. I felt as if the crisp, windy, moonlight surrounded me. I watched Mikasa and Jean get out of the car as Jean was happier than usual. I couldn't feel Mikasa's emotions. I saw Jean head inside as Mikasa was walking slowly behind him.

"Jean, i'll catch up with you in a second." Mikasa gave off a sad vibe. She started walking over towards me which scared me into wiping my tears away.

"Hey, Ere– wait were you crying?! What's wrong??" I didn't even want to look at her, nor give a response.

What do I tell her?

"You don't love me." I grew some adrenaline. Mikasa grew in shock. I take a second to look at her, those beautiful eyes are tearing up.

"Ereh... when did I ever say that."

"By going on that date with Jean... It's obvious that you don't like me, I thought that you did because we had something. But it turned out that I was blinded by your beauty. You never had a thing for me. I've loved you all this time and now I'm regretful, why didn't I confess earlier?"

"You know what Eren.." My head popped up to see what she was going to continue to tell me.

"This is for you."

She pulled me by surprise, kissing me harder than ever before.

I accepted her kiss, quickly. We sat there in the moonlight for just a moment, though it felt like hours. I wish it lasted forever.

She pulled away and started talking.

"Eren, honestly I have no idea on why I went on that date with Jean. I think I just was trying to imagine that it was you. You, Eren Yeager... You're my dream. You are who I love. I was so desperate for you that I was blinded on how you were hurt about my date with Jean. But I will never allow that to happen again. You Eren, You are what I need."

Once again we kissed for a slightly shorter time than before.

I noticed her beautiful, bright smile across her face. I wanted her to smile like that for days and days on.

"You know what– fuck being a pussy. Mikasa Varie Ackerman... May I have the honors of being your boyfriend?"

She immediately yelled, "YES! Of course Ereh~." I tackled her to the ground, hugging, staying there. In peace and silence. I kissed her once again while we got up.

"Mika, what are you going to tell Jean?" The one thing I was worried about.

"I honestly don't know, but all I am worried about is you. I love you Eren."

"I love you too Mikasa."

We headed back inside, happier than ever before.

AUTHORS NOTE- THIS CHAPTER WAS MY LONGEST, LEAVING IT AT 1K WORDS! I'M GLAD THAT THIS IS THE ONE TO ACHIEVE IT AS IT IS AN IMPORTANT CHAPTER!! BUT TYSM AND HAVE A GREAT DAY/NIGHT!!