Mrs Scuderi

chapter twenty four

              Fabiana's Pov
I take a deep breath before walking over to my mom who's busy on the phone with someone and dad just busy analysis the menu even though he'll end up telling them to bring a bit of everything. "Glad to see you're making appearances on blogs again,"she says with a smug smile on her face. "What can I say, my wife deserves personally delivered flowers every once in a while,"i retort remembering how much she hated them because of her allergies. "This is after you cheated on the poor girl?" She asks confusing me as to why she's even sympathizing with Amelia. "That's enough Gianni, we came here to catch up with our eldest daughter,"dad says now focusing on our little back and forth and she listens.

The truth was in their relationship dad had all the money and he let her have access to it because he loves seeing her happy. "Thanks dad,"i say. I can feel the mood change when we're done eating especially with him. But i decide to to not ask until he's ready to tell so i don't irritate him. "I need to tell you something,"he says now leaning toward with mum fiddling her fingers nervously.

"Your father-"

"i can speak for myself Gianni. I was diagnosed with sarcoma cancer two years ago and my friend tried an experimental drug that worked and we thought it was gone until recently when i collapsed and your mother took me in yesterday and found out it was back and aggressive now that it has moved to other parts of my body,"

"why arent you in hospital right now getting treated?"i say with my heart already racing.

Why didn't he tell me this? Was this the reason he was always quiet and had mom take care of most of his work? "Can't an old man enjoy his last meal before being admitted?"he says playfully but I'm still tensed about all this. "You know how stubborn your dad is,"mom says in a less hostile tone and i can agree with her for once. I'll drive you guys there,"i insist but he gets up abruptly to say something and falls immediately.

"Do something!"mom yells at me while kneeling beside him trying to wake him up and i call the ambulance still rooted to the spot at what just happened. The thought of loosing him is one i can't even let stay in my mind for even a second. Mom calls his doctor friend and he walks us through how to try and help before the ambulance came and took him. Mom went with him and i followed them in my car because of how scary it was to see my dad like that. He's all I've had since i was born. I contemplate calling Amelia but don't because she still mad at me and i don't need her agitating me right now. Camino and Haviana deserve to know so I call them to meet me at the hospital.

I don't know why dad would keep something like this from us, we weren't kids anymore. "What is she doing here?"i ask once i see Amelia walk over to mom and I together with my brother and sister. I didn't have the best morning because of how difficult she was. I fucked up i know but give me a chance to redeem myself without bringing it up every fucking two seconds. "She's your wife for fucks sake, you need her right now," Haviana says annoyed walking past me to comfort my mom. "Dad is sick Fabiana, don't make it about you,"Camino says softly reminding me that dad is dying. Amelia stands next to the door away from us and I can tell it's  a bit awkward for her especially with how i reacted when i saw her and with her relationship with my mom.

I'm about to say something when the doctor comes in and asks only my mom to remain behind because she's the spouse. "I'm going to go get some water. Do you guys need anything?"i ask them and both of them nod while Amelia is still quiet, tapping her foot impatiently. "I'll come with you,"she says but i don't have the energy to say no. We walk silently to the cafeteria with her closely behind me.

"Fabi I -"

"please don't I'm not in the mood for your little annoying acts!"i say subconsciously yelling at her and she takes a step back. I regret it the minute i realize what i just did because of how frustrated i am but she just walks away not sure where she's going. I get my water and go back to my siblings wanting to focus entirely on my family and nothing else. They need me now. I find my mom crying with Camino holding her.

"What happened?"

"The doctor says he can't...he doesn't have long because of how fast the cancer is travelling in his body,"she says sobbing. If they had told me sooner i would have got him the best medical care to fight it. Why didn't he? I walk out needing fresh air because if how suffocated i feel and my mind racing so fast. The thought of always having him around made it harder for me accept all this. I walk to the open rooftop and find Amelia seated there alone.

"What are you doing up here?"

"Getting some fresh air just like you Fabi," she said still staring at the sunset not bothered to look up at me. She doesn't say a word the whole time and the loudness in my head isn't helping.

"I'm sorry about earlier,"

"Don't. Just enjoy the peace and quiet," she says not wanting to talk about earlier which i understand. Our talking always ended up somewhere between let's pause it and fuck or just argue it out. "Come back with me,"i say but she hesitates.

"I know when I'm not wanted. I'll be here if you need anything but just go be with your family,"

"Haviana wants you there,"i lie because i know she cares about her. "She needs her sister more than she needs me. I'm going home but keep me updated,"she says tiptoing to kiss my cheek before walking away.

"My dad is dying and you're going to my house to relax, stress free while you wait for me to tell you if he's getting worse or not?" I ask stopping her in her tracks. I wait for her to yell back or get mad but she doesn't, instead she just turns around and rushes back to me enveloping me in a tight hug despite her small figure. We stay like that because i don't want to let go. It makes me feel like what I'm feeling is safe with her. When she pulls away i pull her back to me this time being the one to initiate the hug. "You put your arms around me and I literally felt my knees buckle, this is so pathetic,"i say genuinely making her giggle lightly.

"It's called a genuine hug Fabi,"she says. When we both pull away from each other.

"Why did you do that?"

"You were in desperate need of one,"she says simply looking into my eyes which confuses me because i was yelling words at her earlier, not asking for a hug. She turns to leave but i stop her again holding her arm.

"Please stay,"

"for you or Havi?" She asks clearly wanting me to say it out loud. "For me," i say and that's all she needs to hear before we go back inside to where the rest of my family is. I see mom's mood change when she sees Amelia but i don't care about their differences right now. I want her here and that's all there is to it. Haviana walks over to her making her feel welcomed. "Are you okay? She asks her and she just nods softly. "I'm here if you need anything,"she tells Haviana and she just hugs her crying for the first time since she got the news. I guess she had that effect on people.

"Shh don't cry, it's going to be okay,"she says rubbing her her back and i can't help but tear up myself at how good she is at making everyone feel okay despite the situation. "Not you too, i only have to hands,"she says a little playfully making Haviana chuckle letting go of her to allow her to hug me but i didn't want them to see me vulnerable because I'm supposed to be their stronghold so I refuse the hug and she just shrugs unoffended like she was expecting it. I find my seat next to my mom because she needs me but she just dismisses me saying she has a lot to talk over with the doctor and walks away alone. I've never seen her this distressed but then again she was about to lose her husband, her best friend.