A Journey that change's everything

Ch 15: Lashed out

REDSONS POV: I slid down the bathroom door trying not to cry, ignoring the throbbing pain in my head "Oh look! looks like some prince couldn't handle the emotions so they had to come and hide what a failure." I looked over at the voice seeing little Redson not to far away from me "just stop...I'm not in the mood for this..." I'd hug my knees but the never ending pain was unbearable "awww why not? And why do you all of the sudden not care for your prince charming?" "Noodle boy is not my prince and I don't like him... I HATE HIM and I just realized that he's not worth it or-" "oooohh did you have a change of heart? Or did you just realize that you are the problem to everything and everyone?" Little Redson laughed as I wiped away the tears that were starting to form in my eyes "Yeah... kind of... I mean he's done nothing for me but show pity, EVERYONE only shows pity for me it's outrageous! I hate it they should all hate me especially Noodle boy that stupid excuse for a hero and yet... he makes me so happy... I hate him for it! He's suffering but what about me!? He saved my life ONCE but no one asked about me they only cared about him and he wasn't even the one who got hurt!! I do put people's needs before mine why?!" I sniffled "ohhh you poor poor thing I feel sooo bad for you really depressing... but what about your father how does he make you feel i-" "DON'T even mention his name he's always acting like he knows stuff and he makes you feel like you shouldn't argue back and you can't say anything because he'll beat the fuck out of you or he just does that with me... and Noodle boy would help me... THAT FUCKING BASTARD!! I'll make his life hell!!" I felt tears start to run down my cheeks "oh no Redson it's your fault... why are you crying? Can't handle the truth!?" I looked down at my exposed scars and some bruises on my arms and felt like vomiting "Oh buddha I am a monster..." "a gay one." I rolled my eyes and tryed to ignore Little Redsons comment and started to touch my right arms scars "Wow that's a lot of scars and bruises... HEY!! I just got the best idea! Hurt yourself!!" "What?..." "Add another scar you know you want to~ it'll help you feel better- I mean you already have so many what will one more do? I saw a knife in one of the cabinets you can use that!" I didn't want to admit it but Little Redson was right at home I would cut myself in the same spot until I felt better it would leave a deep cut that drew blood but I knew it wasn't the best thing to do but I still did it "yeah your right... no one would even realize, right?" "YEAH! your right don't doubt yourself!!" "No one cares..." "Redson i can hear you in there... come on out..." I stopped were i was there was a knife in my arm giving me a deep cut as I tryed stopping my tears "l-leave me alone peasant..." I quickly got the knife off my arm and put it in one of the drawers under the sink "hey monkie man is Red in there?" I couldn't see who it was but I knew who the voice was. I heard many other footsteps followed behind Dragon horse girls "Redson let us in." Noodle boy pleaded in a soft tone I saw the door nob swist signaling that he was trying to open the door but I think he realized it was locked "Redson open the door." Noodle boy said, fear could be heard in his voice "I said leave me al-alone, it better for all of us if I stay in here..." I awnsered trying to sound strong and cold even though I was trembling with pain "Hey Red boy I'm kicking this door down if you don't open it! Were freaking out over here!!" Dragon horse girl warned "break the door down see i-if I care I'd also like to see you try." I growled slowly and yet quickly getting up and grabbing some toilet paper to quickly dab the blood dripping down my arm "I warned you!" Dragon girl mentioned as she let out a war cry and soon the door fell down I clenched my fist. I hated the fact that she was so strong it made me feel more weak and pathetic I felt my hair blowout into fire I was so mad "Redson what happened?..." I snickered at his worriedness "your joking me... Hehe- wait your serious?" I joked as my hair calmed down slightly but still you could see the little waves of fire I was trying really REALLY hard not to burst into tears "Red boy your acting like a jerk! Mk is really worried for you and it's like YOU DON'T GIVE A SHIT!!!"Dragon girl hissed in anger "well maybe I don't care... I mean it's not like you care peasant your the one that made that peasant Noodle boy paranoid in the first place if you were careful for once MAYBE he wouldn't have seen my... my UGLY SCARS IF YOU CARE SOOOO MUCH YOU WOULD OF ACTUALLY THOUGHT ABOUT THE CONSEQUENCES OF BEING SO CARELESS" I blurted as she laughed "me careless? Look at you, YOU LOOK LIKE YOUR ON THE VERGE OF DEATH AND YOU ONLY CARE ABOUT YOUR SELF!!! LOOK AT MY ARM!!" She protested and pointed at the wrap that covered her burn 'no don't cry Redson your mother is there and your stronger than that... it was her own fault anyways' "Mei stop he's crying!" Noodle boy advised/yelled to to Dragon girl "NO LOOK AT YOUR WRIST HE DID THAT! I CAN'T BELIEVE I'VE BEEN SHIPPING YOU WITH A MONSTER AND I CAN'T EVEN BELIEVE YOU REDSON!! YOU DON'T EVEN DEAL WITH ANYTHING I BET THIS IS PROBABLY THE FIRST TIME THAT YOU'VE GOTTEN INJURED OTHER THAN YOUR PARENTS DOING IT TO YOU!! I BET HALF OF THOSE SCARS WERE YOUR DOING-" "MEI!" Noodle boy screamed before looking at me in a panic as my stupid never ending tears fell down my eyes like lightning "y-you told her didn't you..." I croaked looking at him with angry, hurt, pathetic, sad eyes my hair started to grow into a slightly bigger flame "Redson I-I didn't mean to! I needed to tell someon-" "NO YOU SAID WE WOULD KEEP THIS BETWEEN US I KEPT MY SIDE OF THE PROMISE BUT IT'S NO SHOCK YOU DIDN'T!!! OH WAIT MY BAD I'M JUST A USELESS UGLY MONSTER EVEN DRAGON GIRL THINKS THAT YOUR RIGHT DRAGON GIRL I AM A MONSTER BUT YOUR WRONG ON SO MANY LEVELS I DID SOME OF THESE SOME!! DO YOU THINK I WOULD NEVER WANT TO LOOK IN THE MIRROR AGAIN BECAUSE ALL I SEE IS A FAILURE AND A USELESS UGLY MONSTER!!! DO YOU EVEN KNOW MY PAIN EVERYTHING THAT HAS HAPPENED TO ME... the things I shouldn't have dealt with... AND YET I WAS ALONE THE WHOLE TIME, THE WHOLE WAY I DIDN'T ASK FOR YOUR HELP! I DIDN'T ASK ANY OF YOUR GUYS HELP I DON'T EVEN WANT TO BE ON THIS JOURNEY BUT I DID IT FOR THAT STUPID NOODLE BOY AND I REGRET IT!! I REGRET IT SO BADLY CAN YOU GUYS TRUST ME FOR ATLEAST ONE SECOND IS THAT TO MUCH TO ASK!?!!" I screamed and wiped my tears away