Behind the Facade// DDLC FANFIC

Body

Tw: suicidal thoughts,intense angst and self harm 
*SAYORIS POV*
I hold onto my sink and stare fearfully at the mirror. I, I have nowhere to go. Monika is so lost, if I even bother go to MC..
She'll..
Kill me.

I sob silently while my head slowly goes down. I don't want to die. Atleast, not this way. I shake my head and tears swell in my eyes. My throat gets lumpy and it's hard to breathe. I look to the side table, and watch the light flicker on my blades. I quickly go to grab them and I sigh loudly. I use the side of my hand to wipe my tears and I rub my arm to the side of my shirt. I lay my hand out and dig straight into my skin. I shakily sigh and fall to the floor. My body feels so weak and I laugh hysterically. I can't stop crying or laughing.

The blood drips down my arms and it falls to my white floor. Every drop makes me feel icky inside. I softly moan as I dig another cut into my wrist and blood spurts out like a tap. Everything is hazy and I fall to the ground completely. I forget where I am, as meaningless tears fall down my eyes. I sniffle, and curl up in the fetal position in an attempt to sort of hug myself.
I am so alone, I think to myself. And I'm not wrong.

Nobody knows how I truly feel. The blood stains my pink shirt. I feel my red bow drop from my head. And my head hits the ground.

I feel frizzy and I wake up in this hazy world. It feels warm, like a warm blanket is over me. All the pain in and on my body is slowly easing. I'm surrounded by pink clouds and it feels so light.  Whistling noises surround me, but slowly go further I follow it. Every step I take feels so peaceful and I nearly fall through the clouds.
I start leaping and a smile grows on my face. All the chains that held me back from being my true self finally broke into pieces and I couldn't believe it.

I stare at the mesmerising pink around me, but a chilling sound starts playing near me. I look to it, to see a sickly dark area of clouds. I hear the wooshing on somebody's footsteps on the clouds and slowly see green eyes pierce the darkness.

Monika steps forward and smiles devilishly. Every sinks, including my heart, and I turn around and run. No. Not her! I think to myself frantically. I start to sweat, my true happy place still has flaws..
Just like me.

I keep leaping until Monika comes right up behind me and drags me by my throat.
She whispers incoherent words and I start to splurt out as I try to breathe.  She starts to laugh, and I look around to see the pink clouds turn grey, and from grey into pitch black. The only light reflecting is her green eyes. I nearly collapse until she shoves me into the cloud and the pink comes back for the glimpse I see before I go straight in.
I see green eyes surround the pitch blackness, and I hear the words, "You'll never be good enough."

I wake up in my bathroom, and see my white bathroom floor covered in my blood. I pant heavily as tears trickle down my face. I put my hands around my throat, as a painful, searing burn is tickling inside.
I know what I have to do.

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK!!!
"Sayori, look it's not what you think it i-"
I punch her straight in her face and she falls to the ground. Blood spurts out her nose as her head flings upwards. She smashes into the ground and I breathe quickly. "Kill me Monika! I dare you. Kill me like you killed all of our frie-"
She launches at me, grabbing my throat. My head hits the door and it shuts loudly. Her green eyes glow, and everything becomes focused on her. "You asked for this Sayori." She smiled evilly into my eyes. My heart sunk, she was never like this. The innocent glow in her sage eyes, now were replaced by the shadow of her forest green eyes. I started to kick her, my throat slowly closing. I felt hot, like burning hot, and my legs couldnt kick as fast as they were. I finally got the strength and shoved my leg into her stomach. She let go quickly while yelling in pain. She crawled up into a ball as I gasped for air.

"Monika...your a psychopath...!" I stammered, and everything went silent, until her laugther echoed out. I quickly crawled away from her. 

"You haven't seen anything yet."

*NEXT DAY- SCHOOL*

I looked around when I entered the school premises. Everybody stared at me weirdly, whispers filled my ears. Kazu wasn't anywhere to be seen, but her sister was sobbing loudly and obnoxiously to all of her friends. "No, I'm not a psychopath I swear! I DIDN'T GIVE HER THE FUCKING KNIFE TO KILL HER!"
"But..you kinda nearly killed her in the school premises-"
"I DIDN'T FUCKING KILL HER THOUGH! GOD!!" Kazu stormed off, wiping her tears hysterically. Her friends still whispered about her.

I decided to mind my own business and deal with the eyes on myself. Somebody came and approached me, tapping my shoulder lightly. "Aren't you the girl who, like, killed all her friends?" She smiled devilishly. I saw the group of beady eyed freaks who thought they were better then others just because they had nice, designer clothes and purses.
"Who said that?" I said calmly. I knew I didn't do it, so I shouldn't overreact.

"Uhh, everybody?! I mean, your kind of a lunatic to be h-"
"Shushh! What if she goes whine to her teachers.." A girl said underneath her breath and they begun laughing out menacingly. I felt panicky, being put on the spot like this. "Anyway, she isn't wrong. Your kind of a freak. But if you dont mind me asking.." She stopped, looked around and came closer to me. I felt frozen as all the eyes pierced into my skin, even from other places.
"What weapon did you use? I won't tell anyone." She whispered in my ear bitterly. I quickly moved back, and she stood back upwards. All of the girls formed a semi-circle around me. The wind blew their hair in the same direction, and the girl who first approached me raised her hand to me.

She blew a hit right to the side of my face with her nails scraping at my face. I fell to the gate behind me and screamed out. Another girl came and kicked my head to the other side to shut me up. "Why are you sad dear?" She smiled. Her name was Jiro. We've always had a tense relationship. 
"Isn't this what you did to your friends? You psychotic bitch." 

I stared at her with my bloody face and tears creeping down my cheeks. I started silently sobbing. "I didn't do anything! It was M-" I  choked out blood, and the girl who first approached me - Her name was Akemi - kicked my stomach so hard I threw up thick blood. They all back away in disgust, and took pictures and videos. I stared, exhausted through the gap of their "popular" semi-circle, and saw the evil green eyes of Monika. She smiled right at me, flicked her hair and walked away.

In the nurses office after they wiped up my fast, I started crying silently, sniffling every few seconds. "What happened hun?" The nurse tilted my head up with a concerned face. I quickly sniffled, and kept silent. She sighed gently, and started calling up my mother. A knock at the door broke the silence, and the nurse quickly leaped up to the door. "Who is it?" She grinned enthusiastically. She gasped and opened the door. "A friend of yours! Monika!"

I heard the sinister sound of her school shoes smashing against the ground, until she came around the corner and smiled at me innocently. "Her house is really close to mine, I wouldn't mind taking her there, if it's okay with you, Sayori?"

I stared frantically at the nurse, and back to Monika. "I think that's the most reasonable thing, we can't reach Sayori's carers either way."

"That's perfect!"