The Office Curve

The Way She Moves

How many people can say, "i rolled up to the club in a black Mercedes with my boyfriend's mother"?

I imagine that answer would be "not very many".

But here we were, rolling up to the valet parking stand at "Luxe Life", quite possibly the most exclusive club in all of the city - seriously.  The pickiness of the bouncers at the door is legendary, if the bitter-laced whispers at the office are any indication.  If the bouncer so much as sense your insignificance, there was no way you were getting in.  If you were dressed in anything other than designer, you were better off avoiding the line all together.  If there was one hair out of place, one piece of jewelry too costume-like, one suit too leisurely, you were doomed.  If you gave the bouncers any reason to suspect you of being a nobody trying to be a somebody, not only were ignored as a nobody, you were publicly branded one as well.

Needless to say, I wondered if the US Miltary would roll up beside us soon because I was sweating enough bullets to arm five word wars.  I would have to wring out my hankerchief and air it out to dry at this rate.

"Luxe Life, Mom, seriously?"  Cecile was unaffected by her son's incredulous stare.  "You took us to a night club?  Are you out of your mind?"

"What?  You embarrassed to be seen with your mother, Nummy Honey?"  She reached out and pinched both cheeks, a strangled yelp passing through Kaim's pursed lips.  "I told you I wanted to have fun tonight, and this is definitely the place to have fun, apparently.  I just hope the bartender in there is good at mixing drinks."

"How the hell could you think that it's okay for a grown man to go to the club with his mother?"  To see Kaim so animated and mortified made me want to laugh so hard, my sides would be ravaged from busting over and over again.  I restrained myself, but it wasn't easy.  "Why couldn't we do something like go to dinner or even to a riverboat casino or something?"

"Oh, I'd have loved to go on a gambling boat, but this city doesn't have one, apparently.  Quite a shame, really."  Cecile tossed her hair, unbothered by her son's reservations.  "Besides, I don't see why you're so upset.  It's not like you can't dance or anything.  You can - I'm the one who taught you, after all.  We should be fine."

"I can't believe this!"  The redness of a ripe cherry had nothing on this guys face.  "You're actually serious!  You actually have no problem doing this, you actually want to go through with this!  You don't see the weirdness of it at all."

"No, I really don't."  And not a single car was given on Cecile's side.  "It's not like I'm going to be in there, holding your hand and telling you to go to the bathroom before your pee on yourself."  I bit my lip just in time, drawing a little blood but keep my laughter in check.  "And what makes you think I'm going to be your side all night anyway?  I want to spend time with you, but not all my time if you, if you know what I mean.  I'd like to keep my options open for whatever comes my way.

Kaim jar dropped to the floor, and I couldn't help but snicker.  Seriously, Cecile was my freaking hero right now.  I hope I can have the same kind of spunk that she has when I'm her age.

"Anyway, let's let the man park the car so we can have a good time already!"  Kaim was still rendered speechless, and I had to help him out of the car.  "Ooh, I'm so excited!  This place is supposed to be quite the spot."

"It must be if it has a line that long."  Packed with hopefuls dressed in designer confections,well-groomed and manicured, the line stretched down the block and around the corner.  The bouncers stood firm in front of the door, and it didn't look like they'd budge anytime soon.  "I hear this club is pretty exclusive."

"Ye of so little faith."  With a wink like that, she had to be up to no good.  "A lady always comes prepared for a night out.  Besides, I've already taken some steps.  Just stick by me."