All I've Ever Known

11 - Harry

Harry is numb. He caved last night after tossing and turning for hours only being able to think about Louis and took his sleeping pills. He feels groggy and nauseas this morning and can't will himself to get out of bed. Why did Louis flinch when Harry tried to kiss him he wondered? They literally just got each other off in one of the best orgasms that Harry had had in an alarmingly long time, and yet when he tried to kiss Louis he had looked frightened of Harry. To make matters worse he now has to be on a 4-hour flight to Melbourne in two hours and hasn't even packed yet.

Stupid. Idiot. Foolish. Some of the tame words that was running through his head as he laid in his bed alone, thinking about what had happened last night. He knew that the bath idea was risky but thought that if something were to happen between the two of them Louis would realise that Harry still had feelings for him. Harry had bought Louis a plane ticket to accompany him to Melbourne and now he felt like such an idiot to think that Louis would ever want anything to do with him. He let the tears fall down his face as he silently got up and started recklessly packing his suitcase. Going into the bathroom, the bath tub was still full as neither one of them had thought to empty it with the turn of events last night.

Harry sobbed harder, his vision blurry as he kept packing all his things. He got a text from Jeff shortly after finishing letting him know his driver was waiting and ready whenever he was. He made his way down to the car, suitcase and backpack in tow and flung himself into the seat, not bothering to pretend that everything was fine as he silently watched out the window as the city passed him by, leaving his heart with it.

He must have fallen asleep on the way to the airport because someone was gently touching his shoulder waking him from his Louis-filled dreams. Jeff.

"Hey mate, ready to go?" Jeff said happily, to that Harry crawled out of the car and fell into Jeff's arms sobbing.

"Hey, hey, what wrong? C'mon let's get on the jet and you can tell me all about it" Harry did, following soundly behind Jeff, tugging on his backpack so tight to stop himself from crying in case there were paps.

As he got into the Jet he realised that everyone was already on board and looking up at him with smiling faces, which quickly turned to frowns as they saw the sight of Harry. He had dark circles under his eyes, his hair was a mess under his hat and his face red and blotchy from crying all night and morning.

He sat next to Mitch, opposite to Sarah and Pauli and began spilling his guts about what had happened with Louis.

They gave him encouraging glances, not interrupting him and letting him cry about his Louis issues in detail, explaining the bath situation too.

Once he had told them everything, Mitch and Sarah were patting his shoulders whispering words of sympathy and telling him everything was going to be alright. Harry noticed that Pauli had been uncharacteristically quiet and wondered aloud what was wrong with him

"These things sometimes work themselves out when you least expect it Haz, don't give up on him yet he might surprise you" Pauli had said softly to him. He had no idea why he could remain so optimistic when Harry felt like his world was being torn apart. And he had to play a show tonight, fucking fantastic.

The rest of the flight was filled with comfortable silence, faint music playing in the back ground as Harry and Mitch played guitar along with the music. Harry let himself get stuck into his playing, his mind wandering to last night and the fact that he might not ever see his blue-eyed lover again. He freely let his tears fall, not caring that he looked a right mess. He knew if he kept it in it would only end in him lashing out at his friends which is the last thing he wanted to do.