𝙢𝙚𝙧𝙘𝙚𝙣𝙖𝙧𝙮↳ 𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙜𝙚 𝙯.

20: Sorry

"Your behavior back there was absolutely unacceptable!" Hange's voice boomed throughout the room the two of you were in. "That was extremely inappropriate and humiliating! I can't believe you'd act out on a kid! A kid! She'd only shot two people and you completely lost it?!"

You didn't answer, you'd simply sat in your chair, leaning back and resting your feet on the table. You rested your arms behind your head, staying silent and watching as Hange continued yelling. They scoffed to themselves at your silence, rubbing their face with their hands before slamming their hand down on the table. Your eyes slowly averted to their hand, you wouldn't be surprised if that left a handprint on there.

"Do you seriously have nothing to say?! Nothing to back up your actions?!"

"My actions were justified, Hange. That girl killed Lobov, using his gear to board the airship then killed Sasha with a gun that she shouldn't even know how to use. I don't care if she's 12 or 32, she got what she deserved, and there's more coming for her."

"She's a child! She couldn't have been older than 14, and you assaulted her and bullied her beyond humiliation! She was probably brainwashed by Marley, you don't know that!"

"She most likely was, but you're seriously not questioning why she thought she could come up and kill Eren?"

"Eren's got nothing to do with how you acted! In fact, no one has anything to do with how you acted! You'd just lost all morality and decided it was ok to assault that poor girl!"

"How is it my fault when she lost her morality first and shot down both Lobov and Sasha?"

"She's not my soldier, Y/n! You are! You were supposed to be the adult in this situation!"

That was the last straw for you as you shot up from your chair, getting face to face with Hange. "Tell that to all the other Scouts who beat her worse than I did. I'm not the only one, so why am I the one getting reprimanded for it?"

"She is a child. Everyone who partook in the beating got an earful, you aren't the only one!"

You clenched your jaw, staring back at Hange for a few more moments before giving up and sitting back in your chair. Hange grit their teeth and looked down at you, petty for the first time. They couldn't believe this, you beat a child senseless and you're chill about it? Did you not care? Where have your morals gone, for crying out loud?!

"She shot down two of our soldiers, did you expect me to simply tell them not to do it again?"

"You could've been a bit more civil about it! You could've been the bigger person there and act like the adult you are!"

You sighed, feeling your body begin to shake a bit as you continued looking down at your lap, fidgeting with your hands. After you noticed Hange's been quiet for a moment, you looked up to find them staring at you with the worst frown you've ever seen present on their face.

"Do you want me to say sorry?"

"It's the least you could do," They scoffed in disappointment, turning on their heel and heading towards the door, leaving your empty figure sitting on the chair. Your expressionless face began to space out as you kept mindlessly fidgeting your clammy hands. Your heart was barely drumming a beat as you continued sitting there, staring off into space.

You wanted to feel bad, honestly you did. But you just didn't have the heart for it right now, between attacking your home and losing a best friend, you almost couldn't take it. Now that Hange left the room, you finally had the time to sit there and actually think about what you did. Sure, you kinda overreacted a little; beating Gabi to a pulp wasn't the most appropriate thing to do as an adult. Sasha's death wouldn't have been that big of a deal to you if you hadn't lost Gertrude prior to it happening. You began to wonder where the tears were, and then you realized you didn't even have the energy to cry; that's another thing, you're so damn tired, and you don't know why. You were lucky to get some sleep that night, you were sure it was a proper amount, yet you just don't want to move. It bored you out of your mind and you wanted to get up and do something, but it's like something was keeping you in your spot.