Secret - Nick. (1)

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Were spending the summer with family friends. They have a huge mansion near the beach and me and my brothers love it. We have known the bailey and Madison since we were born. There twins. Bailey, he's 1 minute older and he's held it above Madison forever. Because he's so "older".

Ive had a thing for bailey since i knew i was gay. He'd always been my first boy crush, there was always something about him but i never knew what it was.

Were driving down the coast and we turn and all i can see is clear blue water. People crowd the beach and i can hear the splash of the sea in my ears. My stomach turns waiting to see bailey. We had a fling last year but it never turned into anything.

" i want you boys on your best behaviour, no arguing." My mom argues, the same statement every year. " were guests so always clean up after yourselves and offer to help." My dad says and i roll my eyes and nod. Matt shakes Chris awake and we pull up to the house and my dad presses the horn and Mr White jogs out and hugs my dad.

" jimmy! Missed you." Mr white says and claps a hand on his shoulder and Mrs white walks out and madison comes running out, her hair soaked.

" hi boys, you all look great. Really grown up." She says and kisses all our cheeks. Her perfume smells the same as it always does. Madison hugs us all and bailey walks out, that same smug look on his face.

He claps a hand on matt and chris' shoulder and he clasps his hand on my neck and his scent is intoxicating.

We haul bags in and get set up. Me matt and Chris share a room. Every year. Bunk beds Which matt and Chris share and then a double bed witch i fight to get. I put clothes in the wardrobe and then some in my wardrobe.

Bailey comes into our room and flops on my bed. " lets go to the beach. Madison is already in the sea, cant drag her out." He smiles and i grab some swim trunks and change into them. Walking out the bathroom bailey is laid on my bed scrolling on his phone. Matt and chris are in the sea, i can see them in the window.

" ready." I sigh and he smiles. " i missed you." He says and i nod. " you never called." I say and he cocks his head and exhales. He stand up and stands close to me, he lays his hands on my neck and brushes his lips to mine. Sending butterflies through my stomach.

" im sorry." He kisses me and then we head down to the beach. I run into the water and dunk my head under the water and i see bailey splashing about. Matt, chris and bailey fling Madison into the air and she splats against the water. She squeals and pushes them all.

" its not funny." She smiles and i laugh. We swim until the sun starts to set and were all panting and out of breath. We walk up to the house, the low sun warming out backs up.

We get in and there are boxes of pizza on the table. " grab a plate and eat some pizza." Mrs White shouts and we all take plates and i get two slices of cheesy pizza. " thank you Mrs White." I say and she smiles. " just Lauren." She smiles and i nod.

" call me Tim." Mr White says and i nod smiling to myself. The parents sit outside while we sprawl out on the sofa. I almost fall asleep my joints are so tired.

" im going to bed." I say and take my plate to the sink. Laurens washing up and i offer to help, which earns me an approving nod. " no its okay, you head up to bed, i heard your tired." She smiles and she kisses my cheek. I take my towel and head to bed.  I lay in the dark listening to Matt and Chris' snores.

My phone light flashes and i turn and see a text from bailey. ' i want to see you' the text reads and i get butterflies before rolling my eyes. Why does he only want to see me when no ones around? What about today?

I get up and head down the hall to his room and tap on the door before walking in. He's sat up against his headboard, his duvet bunched around his waist. He sits on the edge of his bed and i walk up to him and place hands on his shoulder. He wraps his arms around my torso and i lean my head on his.

I sit down next to him and he wraps an arm around my back and kisses my temple. " god nick, let me kiss you." He sighs and i turn to him and he smiles and kisses me. I run my fingers through his hair and he kisses me hard. I lean back and his eyes have softened and my lips feel swollen.

" i really like you." I breathe and rest my head on his chest. He holds my head and i rest my hot cheek against his cold flesh.

" listen, i really like this, but im not ready to commit to anyone." He says, regret is plain as day in his eyes and his facial expression. " what." I ask, sitting further away. His mouth opens to speak but then he stops himself.
" so this is what this is. You call me. We kiss. Then thats it. Then we dont talk for months." I say. He looks hurt but im too hurt to stop.

" are you ashamed of me? Is that what this is, were just a secret." I say and he stands up and shakes his head furiously. " no im just not ready." He says and i raise a brow. " not ready, i dont want to be rude but you came out last year, you gave us that whole speech on how your ready to be yourself. Why am i secret?"
I shout, he tells me to keep my voice down.

" im sorry." He whispers and i open the door and go back to my room. I flop on my bed and lay under my duvet. I fall asleep soon.

The next morning i wake up quite early. At 8am i take some cereal to the outside patio and sit and eat.

" morning." Bailey says, he has trunks on and he jumps into the pool. " hey." I say and turn to head inside.

" wait!" He shouts and i shake my head and plop my bowl in the sink. He runs in soaking wet and grabs my face and almost sucks my lips off. I stable myself by holding onto his shirt and he pulls away with a smile.

" ladies and gentlemen, my boyfriend." He says and blows a kiss at me before heading back to the pool. My stomach warms at his words. Boyfriends. I dont stop smiling all day.

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