Sobahle
I'm leaving Kwanongoma today, I last saw uBukhosibomvelo at the breakfast table and now it's already past lunch time, I just finished getting dressed and I'm going to the main house to let them know about my departure.
"Good afternoon."
I greet my mother-in-law and the aunts.
"Sawubona sisi unjani ?"
One of the aunts greets me and gives me a suspicious look.
"Ngiyaphila Ma wena unjani ?"
"Nami ngiyaphila, Mapholoba umakoti wakho is beautiful."
"Ngiya mbongela." Ma says smiling.
"Sobahle woza, I need your help with something."
She says taking my hand and leading me to a scheduled place.
"Ma I actually came to say goodbye."
"So your stubborn husband disappeared on the day you guys are supposed to discuss the way forward for your mirrage."
"Ma you know that your son hates it when people are in his business."
She nods.
"I hear you but Sobahle are you guys really going forward with this thing ?"
"Unfortunately yebo Ma and I just want you to know that I will forever be grateful for having you as a mother-in-law in my life, thank you for loving me and treating me like your own daughter."
She looks at me with a teary eyes and mine fall down too.
"Sobahle you are my daughter and I will always be there for you and I pray to god that one day you and Bukhosibomvelo will fix things." She says hugging me.
I left Kwanongoma with a broken heart and I just received a phone call from my lawyer saying that the divorce will be finalized on Tuesday, Bukhosi cannot wait to get rid of me.
Today is Monday and I'm done tiding up the house, I'm going to finish up packing my stuff in boxes and prepare an outfit for tomorrow. I will tell Bukhosi about his little invader once, the storm is over because right now is not a good time for me to bring the pregnancy issue up.
This day feels like the shortest and yet the most emotionally draining day of my life. I'm laying on the bed admiring my baby's scans it is still unbelievable that I'm going to be someones mom soon, this scans make me so happy they calm me in the midst of a storm.
I wake-up fast because of the cold air coming inside the bedroom, I must have fallen asleep but I know I didn't leave the windows or the sliding door open, I sit up to check and find a figure standing outside the balcony and I know that's Bukhosi because his scent is everywhere inside the room, I quickly look for the pregnancy scans on my pedestal and they are not there meaning only onething.
"Are you looking for this ?"
He enters the room startling me, he is holding up the sonar scans.
"Bukhosi look...can we talk."
I say getting up from the bed and walking slowly to where he is standing looking at me with anger.
"I..I wanted to tell you so bad but, I didn't have the courage."
Tears fall from my eyes, he looks at me blankly.
"Bukhosi please say something don't just keep quiet, I know that you are probably mad at me..." he cuts me short.
"Mad at you, how profound of you Sobahle you kept my child's existence from me."
He says through gritted teeth.
"I'm sorry ok, I swear I wanted to tell you and I was going to tell you because I know the reason we got married was so that I can carry our child."
I wipe my tears but they keep falling.
"You more than anyone know how much I wanted this, I cannot believe that you were ready to keep my daughter away from me and let the divorce proceed without remorse."
It's so beautiful that he just saw the scans and he is already assuming that we are having a daughter.
"I was scared that you were going to think, I'm using pregnancy to stop you from going forward with the divorce."
"Don't be ridiculous, you know that I wouldn't have that's a very lame excuse."
He says trying not to shout.
"I swear Bukhosi please believe me, I was going to tell you about the pregnancy." I plead with him.
"Sobahle we slept on the same bed the entire weekend and you didn't even think of telling me ?"
I just cry standing there and he looks at me unmoved.
"I'm sorry mageba I'm really sorry."
I say trying to touch him but he steps away from me.
"I want you to call your lawyer and tell him that you are not going forward with the divorce." I look at him puzzled.
"Why? I mean it's late and I'm sure that's impossible."
"It is possible, I made it possible take your phone and call him now and stop asking stupid questions."
I can't believe he just said, I'm stupid.
"What if I want a divorce."
He chuckles and I just look at him puzzled.
"This is not about you siyezwana, I don't fucken care about what you want, what I know is that you are going to call your lawyer right now and tell him what I just told you."
"No." I say bravely.
"No ?" He asks walking towards me, making me move backwards in reverse.
"I won't do that Bukhosibomvelo, I'm tired of you and your confusion you don't know what you want." He chuckles.
"I want you and I'm going to have you."
He says locking me in between himself and the wall.
"No you don't, Bukhosibomvelo move away from me."
"I'm going to move away from you and then wena you are going to pick-up your phone and call your lawyer."
He moves away and I pick-up my phone from the table and call my lawyer, who asks if am I being threatened to withdraw from the divorce and I tell him that everything is fine.
