The wrong Soulmate

My baby boy is getting married

Warning: Scenes of past Trauma. More PTSD.

"We are gathered here today to celebrate the union of these two families in the eternal bond of marriage," The old man who I had met earlier today said while smiling at all the people sitting and watching this union. Why was I here? Why was I doing this? I looked out at the unfamiliar faces in the crowd. Why was I doing this? I looked at the scowling faces of the proper woman who I have never seen smile. The woman who was going to become my mother-in-law. Was I really going to do this? Why did I not run with him? I could have simply run away from this place, who would really notice? Who would notice if the groom ran away from his own wedding? Why did I not run away? I looked at the faces I did not recognize, they were Dire friends. They were not my family, they were not what I wanted. This was not what I wanted. How could I do this? How could I stand here and marry Rose today? How could I marry someone I did not truly believe was my soulmate? There must have been a mistake. There must have been a reason for why I could not stop thinking about that perfect boy. Why could I not stop thinking about Percy? Why could I not get his face out of my head? Even now after everything he told me. Why could I not stop thinking about him? He told me I was crazy. He told me that Rose was my soulmate. He told me that I should marry her. I had heard the words myself. I had seen him say those things to me when I had desperately begged him to tell me that what I was feeling for him was all true. I had begged him to take me away from here. What did I expect would happen? Did I expect him to take my hands and run away with me? Was I that insane? Rose was my soulmate and today we were getting married. She was becoming my wife. I needed to put this past me. I was about to marry Rose. I was going to start a family with Rose. I was going to become the husband of the Dire heir. I had responsibilities. I could no longer think about her brother. He had run away, he was no longer here. I needed to focus on the task at hand. I was marrying Rose. It did not matter that he looked incredibly sexy in that suit. It did not matter that it was my favorite color. It did not matter how good he looked with our colors matched together. It did not matter that I had thought about nobody but him in the last three years. I was marrying Rose. I was marrying my soulmate. That was the only thing that mattered. Percy and I were nothing and we would never be anything. It was over. This was over. I was marrying Rose.

"Dad! I think you can let go of the tie now" I heard this voice say suddenly which caused everything to shift. I was no longer standing in front of all the mean faces. I was no longer standing next to the brunette woman with green eyes. I was no longer in that nightmare. I looked around me and my eyes locked on the bright eyes in front of me. I looked at the worried eyes of my son before remembering where I was and what I was doing. It was Ky's wedding day and I was helping him with his tie. I quickly stepped back from my really handsome boy before shaking my head. I was no longer there. This was not my wedding, this was Ky's wedding. This was not that terrible day where I had lost everything, this was a joyous day. My baby boy was getting married. I need to get a grip on my emotions. I am no longer in that nightmare. I am free.

"Dad, are you okay?" He asked me and I looked back up at him. Was I okay? No, I do not believe I am. It felt so real. It was horrible. I was back there, I was back on that day. It felt so real. The judgemental faces, the look in everyone's eyes. The way I felt inside my heart, the heartbreak, and the regret. The feeling of Rose's hands in mine. Everything felt so real. I have never had such a vivid memory in my entire life. I hated it, I hated every minute of it. Why was I thinking about my wedding day right now? Was it because this is the first wedding I have been to since then? Was it because Percy and I had finally talked about everything that happened? Was it because my son looked so much like his mother? Was it because this wedding was young just like that one? Why were my demons choosing to come out today? My son was getting married. I needed to focus on that. It was a beautiful thing after all.