Sinner // Sebastian Sallow

SEVENTEEN

"Where do you go when there's no school?"

You're sitting out at the lake again, basking in the sun as it begins to set below the horizon.

"I don't have a home," you answer truthfully. "I just go with whoever offers to take me in for the holidays, or I stay here."

Sebastian Sallow takes his time with his answer, legs stretched out across the grass and shirt sleeves rolled up to his elbow. Once again, he's lost the outer uniform robes as soon as classes are over. He looks more approachable without them, you think.

"Where did you live before Hogwarts, then?"

You smile slightly, "Professor Fig looked after me. But I don't remember my life before that."

"Not even when you were very small?" he says with disbelief.

"My parents died when I was very young, everything is a blur after that," you explain, marveling at the purple sky.

"So did mine, but I remember things that happened afterwards," Sebastian says, turning his head to look your way. "You're quite unlike anyone I've ever met before."

"How so?"

He contemplates it in his head, turning back to the sunlight. His freckles match the light so perfectly; you're jealous.

"You have no memory of your entire childhood," Sebastian starts. "You have Ancient Magic, and you're so...you just jump into things regardless of the risk to yourself."

You flash a lopsided smile his way, "It's part of my charm."

Unexpectedly, he laughs nervously, face flushed as he casts his eyes down to his outstretched feet.

It's been a while since you've been down to the lake; getting out of castle grounds on a week day is near to impossible, and the daylight now draws so short. Besides, you'd rather be in company than without in a place as desolate and hidden as this. Several weeks have passed by since Sebastian first introduced you and, in between studies and your new-found reconciled friendship with Ominis Gaunt, you just haven't had a chance.

Despite that, your meetings with Sebastian haven't ceased, but they've certainly began to stretch out. What was once every evening is now once or twice a week; you prefer it this way, but something's nagging in the back of your head that Sebastian doesn't share the same sentiment.

"I want to ask you something," he clears his throat, eyes flitting between you and the setting sun. The green in his irises pops out, a brilliant light underneath the warm glow. 

"Go ahead," you turn your head away to prevent the staring, wrapping your arms around your abdomen. 

The pause between you stretches for miles before Sebastian follows on, "Where are you going for Christmas?"

Truthfully, you haven't thought much of it. Hardly in the mood for festivities, you don't have the slightest shred of interest. The only person you enjoyed celebrating with is dead, and there are plenty more Christmases to come. It just seems pointless.

"Hogwarts," you reply simply. "I've got nowhere else to go."

"Would you come with me?"

You freeze. 

Quite frankly, you could think of many better things to do than to spend your winter break with Sebastian Sallow. His whereabouts outside of school never really occurred to you before. Despite everything that went down, Sebastian hasn't spent a single break at the castle, which you half-expected him to do. If you'd been shunned by his family  like him, you're sure that's what you would do.

But you're not Sebastian, and Sebastian certainly isn't you.

"To Feldcroft?" you find yourself asking.

To your surprise, Sebastian nods, "Yes, same house I took you to in fifth grade."

"What about Anne?"

He chuckles bitterly, and for a moment you regret even bringing her up, "Anne never returned home. She...she left, and I've not seen her since you did."

"Not even a note?"

"She left a note, but she still doesn't want to see me." he squirms under your gaze, hanging his head to avoid looking at you. "It's just me in the house...there's a spare room."

You're not interested in Christmas this year; yet spending it alone sounds like your worst nightmare, and Sebastian is already living it.

"Okay," you bring your train of thought to a stop.

His head snaps towards you faster than you think you've ever seen before, "Okay?"

You nod your head once, "Yes, I'll come to Feldcroft."

As if a weight just lifts from his shoulders, Sebastian exhales deeply — a sigh of relief — and allows a smile to quirk the corners of his mouth up.

"Really?" he asks in disbelief. "It'll be just me, but I just thought it might be something different for you."

"I'm in your company alone quite a bit," you remind him. "It's fine. Besides, I've spent the last couple of Christmases at Hogwarts, being away might be good for me."

Sebastian smiles softly, turning his head to his lap, "Maybe you're right."

There's an expression you can't quite make out on his face, and it bugs you. Whatever it is, it's soft and warm — but unreadable.

"How long do you think until the lake freezes over?" you clear your throat, stepping through the silence.

Sebastian's head doesn't raise, but his eyes flick up towards the water's edge, "Another month maybe, it won't be long now."

He watches the ripples on the lake's surface, flitting from one to the other as they gently brush the dirt edge, before he turns back to you, "Have you ever been skating before?"

"Never. Why's that?"

Sebastian chews on his bottom lip in thought, taking a leap of faith, "If you stay with me, would you like to try it?"

You never lived anywhere near a large body of water, but you've heard the stories of the River Thames freezing over and Muggles taking the opportunity to go out across the river. It sounds like so much fun, but you're not sure you've ever considered it for yourself.

"Yes," you say, smiling back. "I would love to."