Resentment

Chapter Three

Normally Dirk and Dave wouldn't sleep in separate rooms, they would watch a movie together and fall asleep in a tangle on the couch. But that night, Dirk didn't leave his room. Not to eat, not to go to the bathroom, not to tell Dave what was wrong.

It scared Dave. He knew something was wrong. He didn't know if it was something he did, something that happened at school, or what. But it scared him, a lot. And Dirk just flat out refused to say anything to him.

When Dave woke up the next morning, he wasn't rested at all. It was an empty sleep, he could barely get up. His entire body felt weighed down, and he was dizzy. But once he had some breakfast, that went away.

When he had breakfast, he noticed Dirk wasn't at the apartment. He had left early, not even staying long enough to see Dave in the morning. It stung, but he tried to ignore it. Play it off like Dirk needed some space for a bit. But it was hard to ignore the fact there wasn't another cereal bowl in the sink or the dish washer with his own.

At school, he didn't see Dirk until around lunch time. They had the same lunch, and so Dave would always give Dirk a little nod to signal he knew where he was. But today, Dave had to look harder to find his brother.

Dirk wasn't in his normal spot, sitting alone and reading as he ate. This time Dave only saw him walking, toward the bathrooms. He wasn't wearing his shades again, and his walk wasn't as full of step as it was before. He seemed to drag his feet more.

Something was up.

After school, Dirk didn't wait at all. He went home, not sitting on the rock and watching Dave from across the parking lot.

Several times throughout the day his friends had asked what was wrong, if he was okay. He had always played it off as being tired, which he was.

He was dying inside though. It burned to know that something was up with Dirk, and he didn't trust Dave enough to talk about it.

~

First morning. Now, Dirk wasn't excited for this. He left early, not eating anything. He didn't want to waste any time in possibility of seeing Dave, he couldn't face seeing his brother.

He went to the school, it was darker out, the sun not risen yet. Once at the portables, Roxy was already waiting. She giggled and hiccuped, setting her water bottle down next to her. Dirk had a feeling it wasn't water in there.

"Come here baby," she told him, holding her arms out to him, her words slurred together.

Dirk approached her slowly, setting down his bag and letting her pull him in. She hugged his waist and started with his neck, giving his skin sloppy kisses.

His neck was sensitive, but this was different. It wasn't Dave, he didn't want it this time. And she was horrible at kissing when drunk, just disgusting.

She made him play along, made him kiss her and made him stay quiet. Her hands went all over his body, and it took all of his energy to not flinch away from the touch.

Once the school bell rang, she put her shirt back on. Inside out.

"Well that was fun," she observed, laughing to herself. Dirk didn't say a word, just zipped up his pants and grabbed his bags.

He didn't eat lunch that day. He wasn't hungry, his stomach still knotted up.

After school, he didn't bother to wait, just went back to the apartment. He went straight to his room and closed the door, going to drawing.

He was lonely, yes. But there was nothing he could do about it. All he could do was sit and deal with it, let Dave deal with it in his own way.

To be honest, he hadn't slept at all the night before. He had cried, so much. He cried so much his stomach hurt, and in the middle of the night he had to go to the bathroom to hurl. He had cried so much he made himself puke, he felt so guilty, so anxious about everything.

He rested his head on the desk, fighting back the tears. He hadn't put his shades on, he didn't want to wear them. That witch had touched them, and they didn't make him feel cool anymore. Just a douche bag.

That night close to eight, there was a soft knock at his door. Before Dirk could answer, Dave had opened the door carrying a plate with a piece of pizza that had been microwaved. It was left overs from the pizza they had ordered a couple nights before.

"Hey, have you eaten today?" Dave asked, keeping his voice even. He didn't sound hurt at all, which kinda just made Dirk's stomach screw up even more.

"Not hungry," Dirk muttered, not even bothering to lift his head up from the desk.

"Come on bro I didn't see a bowl this morning, and I didn't see you eating at lunch. You gotta eat something," Dave told him.

Dirk finally took his head off the desk and put his face in his hands, shaking his head. "I'm not hungry," he mumbled, voice muffled by his hands.

"Bro-" Dave started, but Dirk stood. He turned to look at Dave, look him in the eye for the first time in days. His orange eyes stared into Dave's shades, bloodshot and cold. It scared him.

"I'm not hungry," Dirk repeated. "Please. Get out."

Dave pressed his lips together, wondering how to approach the situation. He opened his mouth to say something else, but Dirk spoke again.

"Out!" he said, voice a bit more forceful than intended. Dave jumped slightly and quickly closed the door, leaving the room and Dirk to himself.

Dirk instantly regretted it, regretted shouting at Dave. He groaned and fell forward onto his bed, shoving his face into the pillow and bursting into a fit. He screamed into the pillow, gripping it's edges and curling his body in. He didn't know what to do with himself anymore.