Freen&Becky (I need you more than I want to) S1

Couldn't I have been the only one?

BECKY'S POV

It was as if the entire talk show was about Kao. She was so happy and so joyful talking about that girl.

Was she really leaving me for her? Have she forgotten about me so soon? I know things didn't end the way we wanted it to but she said that she loved me.

I never knew those words didn't mean that much to her. She has already moved on.  She's already in love with someone else.

Every single question about me, she avoided answering but she said everything good about Kao.

It was Kao this, Kao that. Kao! Kao!! Kao!!!

I just sat down in front of my television watching as Freeny, as my Freeny was talking about another woman in such a lovely manner.

I couldn't help myself, I started crying while sitting down right there in front of the television.

I know that I was selfish for ending things the way I did.

I know that I must have hurt her so much but why?  why Freeny?  why???

why would she leave me so easily? how could she stop thinking about me within the space of a year.

Our breakup was still fresh on my mind like it happened yesterday and she is always in my thoughts.

I see her when I fall asleep but she is leaving so soon. This is the worst.

I thought I could do this but seeing her with that girl's hand over your shoulders is not something I think I can digest.

I didn't unfollow her on social media like you did to me. I was hoping that one day Freeny and I would end up together.

Was it all worth it? I give up Freeny's love because I listened to my parents but watching as Freeny slowly drifts away from me is something my heart can't take.

If she leaves me, I swear to God, I will not be able to survive it. I should have just told her back then rather than being rude.

Maybe, and just maybe, she wouldn't have hurt me this way. Oh my God! what have I done?

What am I going to do now? She's now holding hands with someone else she's holding hands with that girl KAO CAMPEN.

That should have been me. I should have been the one holding hands with Freen and not that KAO CAMPEN.

I choose to listen to my parents and abandon my love for Freen and no matter how hard I try to live my life and no matter what I do, my world is just an empty place.

It's like I've been in a desert for a thousand years and there has been no escape for me. The little sign of hope I had has Just been swept away by the dry breeze of KAO CAMPEN.

I was so devastated. I cried all through that day being scared that I had lost Freen forever.

That night, I was really angry at what Freen did. She posted our breakup without talking to me about it first. She also unfollowed my accounts. Now she's doing this?

Freen belittled me. She decided not to talk about me in her talk show but she happily said everything good about Kao. She ignored all questions about me seeing them as irrelevant right?

Since she has decided to treat me this way, I'd also do my part. She posted the breakup, I'll tell the public the reason why we broke up.

I'll tell them everything that led to the breakup and my opinion on our break up.

I decided to make a video, talking about our breakup.

I was inside my room and I locked the door so that nobody would know what I was doing or interrupt me.

I placed my phone and mic in front of me, and started recording.

"Hi guys, this is Rebecca Patricia Armstrong. Everybody has been asking questions about my breakup with Freen and I think you guys should know everything.

On 17th September last year, I woke up in the morning and when I turned on my internet connection, I saw so many messages.

I do get messages but this was so much more than my usual.

I became curious and decided to check these messages. "BECKY, WHY IS FREEN BREAKING UP WITH YOU?" was the first message I saw.

I continued reading other messages and they were all pointing out the fact the Freen has broken up with me.

It is quite funny now that think about it. Because she broke up with me, and I didn't even know.

I wondered why such questions were been ask and so I went to Freeny's Twitter account and I was surprised by what I saw.

"SOMETIMES FOR THE SAFETY OF OUR HEARTS, WE HAVE TO TAKE SOME DRASTIC STEPS. BECKY AND I ARE OVER. WE'RE NO LONGER DATING" this was Freeny's post.

And then I also noticed that she has unfollowed my accounts. I'm not saying that everything between us was perfect when this happened.

I'm not saying that nothing happened that led Freen to post that. We had a little fight, I mean lovers do fight but I was surprised at her approach to things.

I haven't even talked to her since she went online to breakup with me and I also didn't say anything because I was also in shock but I think you all deserves to know the truth."

I just posted the video that night and went to bed. I wasn't thinking straight. My judgement was clouded by the image of Kao's hand over my Freeny's shoulders.

I was scared that she would leave me but when I woke up the next morning, I started feeling remorseful for what I did and what I said in the video.

Freeny never broke up with me, I broke up with her but because she posted it on social media first, I was using that to make her the bad one.

I was making myself the victim when Freen is actually the victim here. I was being selfish and I left her because of my selfishness and now, I'm doing it again.

I rushed to my phone to quickly take down the video but it was already too late. It had already spread like wild fire and Freen would be blamed for everything.

To be continued...

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