Yours Truly, Austin Post - Post Malone

45

By the time they get back to America Ava is all travelled out and pretty happy to be back home. She collects Mr Tubs from her mom who practically ties her to her kitchen chair and demands she tell her what is going on. She does not believe Ava's story about going on holiday with friends.

Ava feels a little giddy so she breaks down and tells her mom about Austin - she tells her everything right from the time Gracie opened the front door to Austin's stupid comment about the peach pie. She is a little nervous about her mom's reaction because her mom had not disliked Carter, she had loved him too, but she had not hidden her feelings about Ava marrying Carter. She had not been keen on it - it had been a lot for a nineteen to take on and any mother would be concerned about it. Carter had died when Ava had been only twenty-one and it had been a very rough start to adult life. Her mom had been Ava's rock after Carter had passed - she had seen Ava at her most depressive moment, at her weakest moment when she had felt she could not do this life without him and contemplated joining him - it was a very dark moment.

She hasn't hidden Austin from her mom because she does not like her mom, but her mom is a little bit of a drama queen and says things out of pocket - she is a lot of emotion to deal with so by the time Ava gets to the end of her story her mother is in tears, as she expected, it takes Ava a good half an hour to get her to stop crying.

"I would like to meet them, Ava. They sound wonderful...although I am a little concerned," her mother says.

Austin had been asking about her mother and said he would like to meet her, but Ava has her reservations. She is scared her mother will pull him aside and tell him to stop talking about Gracie or to take Gracie's pictures down. She won't be doing it to be nasty, she will think she is protecting her daughter. Ava does not want Austin to deal with that, but he won't let her keep her mom hidden for long. She will have to tell him what her mother's views are eventually.

"What are you concerned about, Mom?"

"Well...there are four of you in this relationship, honey. You, Austin, Carter, and Gracie. I am not sure that is healthy."

"I know it's a little strange and I know it's even a little hard to understand. But, I need someone who does not make me feel I have to leave Carter behind to move on, Mom. I have always said that. Austin is the same when it comes to Gracie. I love Gracie, Mom and I think...no, I know Austin loves Carter and that just makes me adore him even more. This works for us. We can be ourselves around each other - no masks."

"He does sound like an amazing man. He must be something very special. I would like to meet him and little Grayson too."

"He is very special and so is Grayson. I will arrange something, ok?"

It's weird being home, not because things have changed so much between her and Austin but because her apartment just does not feel like home. It just has a different feel to it and she misses Austin and Grayson. She had been around them constantly and now with them back home and her in her apartment she feels detached. She is tempted to pack her bags and insists they let her sleep on their front steps so she can be close to them.

But, Austin is a father and he needs to put Grayson first - there is no place for whimsical decisions,  besides Ava is not sure she is ready for such a big step - Austin's house belongs to Gracie still, she's everywhere and that's ok. She has never been in Austin's room since the time she placed Grayson in his bed as a baby but she suspects of all the rooms in the house that room alone has remained frozen in time as if Gracie is curled up in his bed asleep. How would they even begin to approach that conversation? She wants Gracie around but she also does not want Austin to feel he has to change things he was never able to just to accommodate Ava - bedrooms are very personal, they're a reflection of a person's soul.

If she ever did find herself even sleeping over she does not think she would be comfortable climbing into Gracie's bed, walking on Gracie's soft carpet, or placing her glass of water next to Gracie's book on the bedside table that she is sure is still right there. It's just not right and she does not think that would be respectful to Gracie...it would not be respectful to herself and she is not sure how Austin will cope with that.

She opens the windows to her apartment and lets the almost three-month-old stale air out then stands and sweeps her eyes over her lounge - yup, this place feels almost as disconnected to her as a hotel room. She hears her phone ringing in the kitchen and trots off to answer it, her stomach flip-flopping when she sees it Austin.

"Hi!"

"Hey, you settled back in?"

"A little."

"Good...so...I have a little boy here who says he is missing his Ava. He says he can't go to sleep without one of your chats and he was hoping he could just say hi before he goes to bed...might also have a big boy who is missing having you around too, just saying."

Ava lets a soft laugh bubble up in her chest as she wanders back to her lounge and flops on the couch. "I was wondering how I was going to get to sleep too. I would love to chat with that little boy and then later if that big boy needs a chat too, I can manage that as well."

Austin chuckles then passes the phone to Grayson. Ava has a chat with him, it's nothing special, just a chat about what went on for him today and even a little peep into his plans for tomorrow then after, when Ava is showered and under her bed covers, Austin phones her and they chat for hours about nothing and everything.

As the weeks go by and school starts again this becomes their nightly ritual which sometimes is a little crazy given that Ava finds herself at their home almost every weekend and even in the afternoons just after school.