The Trilogy: Smuts & One-Shots

I See You-: Chris Evans

Chris' Pov: PART TWO

    "I'm home." I yell.

    The house was silent. No sound filled my home other than Dodgers paws, running up to me with his tail wagging behind him.

    "Hey bub." I say, kneeling down to pet him.

    Y/n didn't follow behind him. She's always behind him, welcoming me home.

    "Honey?" I yell.

    Silence.

    Something was off. Y/n wasn't rushing in with her normal bubbly self, wrapping her arms around my neck before I could even close the door. This isn't right. My home has never been this quiet.

    "Where's momma?" I ask Dodger, standing up and walking into the living room.

    She wasn't there. Kitchen. She wasn't there. Bathroom. She wasn't there. Bedroom.. A note. My heart sinks.

    "No.. No no no no." I yell.

    I drag my feet to the desk she'd once sat at. My heart aches with each neatly written letter on the page. I can picture her. Sitting there. Tears rolling down her face as she writes this. My heart leaves my body with the tear stain smudging 'goodbye'.

    No. She didn't. She couldn't possibly think I want someone else. I only want her. She's the only woman I saw. She was gone. I made her leave.

    I sat on the edge of the bed. Tears filling my eyes until I can't contain them anymore. They fall freely, with my soul. My mind. My whole being leaving the second she walked out of that door. I stare at her desk. I can see her ghost. Sitting there, writing, smiling. She was beautiful. She was magical. She wasn't there.

    She carried me. Y/n was my only reason for being here. She was my life. My life was gone. I would be gone if she wasn't here. My will for living dissipated. I needed her.

    I was drowning. Her memory fills my empty home.. This house was hers and if she's not here, it might as well be burned to the ground. There was no point for the foundation if she wasn't here. It might as well cave in and take me with it. Leave me with what was once filled with happiness and joy. Take me.

    "She can't be gone. She couldn't." I say to myself.

    I hide my face in my hands. I can't even let Dodger see me this broken. That's what I am. I am broken without her and she's the only thing that can fix me. She's the only medicine that could heal the illness of heartache that filled my chest. She's the only one. She was the only one. She vanished. She's a memory. I can't settle for a memory.

    I can't close my eyes. All I see is her face and her smile. I can't keep my eyes open, she's all over the house. A ghost haunting me. Reminding me of every mistake I made.

    I need her.

    I grab my phone from my pocket. My Face ID not even recognizing the piece of shit staring into it. Fuck. I type my pin.. Hands shaking as they press each number. I manage to find my contacts through the blur my tears created.

    I called her. No answer. I called again. Voicemail. Call. Voicemail. It's a fucking pattren now. It's my worst nightmare. This was all a dream. I had to be dreaming and this was just a brutal nightmare where my heart was being ripped out of my chest and smashed on. This was a dream. Right? No, this was real. I caused this. This is because of me.

    "Her mom. She'd go to her mother." I assured myself, "Her mom would answer."

    I called her.

"Hello."

Finally, a fucking answer. .

    "I'm so sorry." I can barely force a sentence out of my mouth. I sound fucking pathetic right now. My voice is gone. It's nothing but a whine at this point. "Is Y/n the- there?"

    "Chris, honey. She isn't here." I can hear it in her voice, she knows. She feels sorry for me but she's going to protect her daughter no matter what. She is there. Her mother is lying. I know how she sounds when she's lying. Just like her daughter. Her voice is soft and emotionless. I want to tell her she's lying, but I can't.

I swallow my pride.

    "Yeah. Yeah,okay.. Thank you."

    Fuck.

    I throw my phone. It flies across the room, smashing a window and landing in the pool in my backyard. My anger takes control of my body. I'm no longer Chris. I am a broken man who has lost his mind. I'm a ball of anger, throwing things. Punching holes into my wall.

    This is why I needed her. She was calm after the storm. With her, there was never a storm. I needed her. I will always need her.

    I found myself standing in the bathroom, staring at myself. My eyes were red and puffy. My cheeks stained pink, just like hers was when she'd wear my favorite blush that looked perfect on her white skin. I didn't recognize myself anymore. I couldn't. I was only myself when I was with Y/n.

    I scream.

    My fist collided with the reflective glass that held my reflection. Shards of glass that didn't stick to my knuckles fall into the skin. Blood drips onto the floor in little dots, like the ones she'd leave on the table when she'd paint her nails. Everything reminds me of her. Everything I do. I can't escape her even if I tried.

    "Fuck!" I yell through the house.

    I have to find her. I have to explain. I can't let her go on thinking I wanted someone else. It just isn't true. I can't leave her with that pain. I only want her.

    This is how she felt. I knew it. I can feel her pain. Her heart shattered like the mirror I just broke. I can feel each tear she drops, dropping from my own eyes. I can feel the hate she has for me. It's the same hate I have for myself.

    My feet take me to the counter, where I always leave my keys. I swallow a spirit before retrieving my truck keys and take off.

    I drove for hours before building up the courage to go to her parents' townhome. I pull up to their driveway, feeling my heart heal itself the closer I get. She's here. My body remains in the car for a minute. Thoughts fill my head.

    She hates me. No, she loves me. She said it in the letter. But she doesn't want me here, or maybe she does. Maybe she wanted me to follow her here. Maybe she wanted me to fight for her. If this is what it takes to get her back, I'll do it. I'll let myself out to her. I'll give her every part of me she needs.

    I get out of my car, slowly walking up to the door. Every piece of pain, falling behind me. Leaving a trail of regret of everything I've ever done to make her feel the way she does about me. Flooding the yard with pains and sorrow. I feel lighter. I feel naked, but that's what she needs. I have to be raw. She needs this.

    Knock.. Knock.. Knock..

    The door opens. A figure stands at the door.

    Her hair was in a bun. She was wearing the oversized t-shirt I gave her. She stood there. Her eyes are just as red as mine but even more swollen. My 6'0 body towering over her 5'1" self.

    I melt. I'm a puddle waiting for her to splash in me.

     "Chris." She spoke.

    "Y/n."