The Billionaire's Addiction

17

Anika Vargas

I observed her and it seemed like she was stuck in one spot. I gaze at her, anticipating her response. It appeared like she was taking longer than I anticipated to process the information. My nerves grew with every passing second.

"Yes, I knew it!" My sister throws her hands up in the air like her favorite football team just scored a touchdown, and I stare at her in shock. Her excitement level hasn't been this high in a long time.

She even startled poor little Lola, who was trying to take a nap. After leaving Mateo, I went straight over to my parents' house. Thankfully, they weren't here. After what happened, Alana is the only one I have been in contact with. It has been a while since we had our regular Friday dates, and I do not plan on having it anytime soon. I am still upset with Akira for reacting the way she did, even though she is my sister. She had no right to behave that way. I still love them, but it will take me some time to forgive them.

"Are you being genuine right now? Is that all you have to say?"

Alana runs her fingers through her curly burgundy hair before flopping down on her bed, making me bounce a little in the process.

"I have a little confession," she says, holding her pointer finger and thumb close so that there is a small space in between. "Mateo begged me to talk to you, so you will give him another chance. I was upset with him and sided with you, so instead of listening to him, I told him to go fück himself and leave you alone."

It didn't surprise me that Alana would say something like that. I couldn't blame her for making that decision back then, although I wished she would have told me instead of also keeping secrets. I know Alana adores Mateo, so that would be the reason for her excitement.

"You can't be mad at me, Anika. Please don't be mad." She says in a cute, pleading voice.

I was not mad at Alana, I could not be.

"I have no reason to be mad at you, Alana. You did not do anything wrong. Mateo chose to leave me in the dark. He made me believe that he was unfaithful. That's just selfish. I could have been there for him and that is the reason I am upset with him. He should have told me the truth."

Alana let out a sigh and laid down next to me. We were both fixated on the white ceiling of her old bedroom. The glow-in-the-dark stars I gave her years ago were still stuck on it even after we moved out.

It must have been difficult for Mateo to handle. I don't know what that is like. None of us do. Sure, we can try to understand, but it will never be the same as experiencing it firsthand. Try to imagine your mind taking control of you and no matter how much you try to think positively, it just always falls back on negative thoughts. You know what he went through with his family was awful. It is completely up to you, sis, but I think you should forgive him."

Alana was right. She is the youngest, but she is so smart. She is like a little old lady trapped in the body of a young lady. I only see from the outside what was happening to Mateo, but I can never understand what he had been feeling on the inside and even though Alana will hate my decision, this is what I need to do. I needed a break from everything that was going on.

"I'm going to Spain."

Mateo Haynes

There was not much liquor in the bottle. I hesitated before bringing it to my lips and drowning its contents. I was not an alcoholic, but I needed to cut down on my intake of alcohol. Certain things I need to leave in the past and this was one of them, especially now that the boys are in my life. I don't want them to see me as a drunk.

I slouch down on the couch. As soon as I close my eyes, the image of Anika floods my memories. She was sad and upset about what I did. It broke my heart to see her cry like that, cry because of how much I hurt her. It was the most foolish thing I have ever done, but at that time I thought it was for the best. I thought that putting distance between us would cause her less pain, but now I realize that it only caused her more.

It was stupid of me and now I might lose her completely, drive her in the arms of another man. I don't think I can live every day knowing that she is with another man. That another man is making her smile, making her happy. Even though I had failed at that, Anika will always own my heart and she belongs with me. At the same time, I can not force her to be with me. She gave me a chance, and I screwed up. It was up to her to choose what she wanted to do and at this point, I don't think that she will choose to be with me.

All I want is for us to start over together. I don't want her to be with that Mama's boy. I'm not sure what Anika is trying to prove, but she is not as happy with him as she was when she was with me. There is a beautiful glow in her eyes when she is with me. I run my hands over my head and groan in frustration. I should have thought about this. The woman loved me and I messed up badly. I was trapped in my mind and pushed her away. It scared me that I would turn into my father and hurt her. Fear made me lose the one woman I ever loved besides my mother, and there must be something that I can do to get her to forgive me.

She said she needed space and I will give her that, but I will fight for her this time. I will not lose her again, especially to another man. I stood from my seat and paced the floor, wondering how I was going to do that.

Her family deserves an explanation. They should know that I did not have an affair. Her mother was so good to me and I also failed her. Her father already hated me and I gave him more reason to hate me. Alana was like my little sister. We had similar personalities. She looked up to me and I love her, yet I also failed her by breaking her sister's heart. Akira and I didn't talk much, but she was also there, supporting Anika and my relationship from the start. I failed them all, and even myself.

My therapist once told me that I should accept the past and not let it weigh me down. That I should move forward, but I can not do that without meeting with her family and apologizing for what I did. They will be even more upset than Anika is, but I will accept whatever comes my way once I confess to them.