delphinium - remus lupin ¹

five | snivellus snape

Dear diary,

Severus Snape is one of the most complex people I have ever had the displeasure of meeting. He's everywhere and I hate it. I don't understand how Lily puts up with him. If it wouldn't cost Gryffindor more of their 'oh-so precious' points then I would be heading to Azkaban for accidentally casting an unforgivable in his direction.

Ever since Dumbledore asked me to try and mend this bad habit streak I seem to be on, I've been trying my hardest – I really have. There are just moments in every day that make me want to dive right back into the impulses I've been told to avoid.

And most of them start with Snivellus Snape.

"Pettigrew." Severus sat down next to Penelope in the Library. He was uninvited and unwanted at the table for two but still stayed anyway.

He had carried in a large, hardback book on potions from one of the shelves. The book wasn't on the required reading list she had been forced to work her way through, only proving to her how insufferably talented Severus was in academics.

"Snivellus." She didn't lift her head from the Transfiguration theory book she forced herself to read. Minnie had reminded her of the overdue theory homework Penelope forgot to complete from fourth year a few days ago, seeming to want Penelope's worst nightmare to continue on for even longer.

"'Intermediate Transfiguration'? You're finally doing the homework Professor McGonagall set last week? I'm impressed-" Severus opened his book on the table, spreading out some parchment after too.

"More like a year ago." Penelope still hadn't lifted her head up from hovering off the table's surface. It had taken her a long four hours of sitting in the uncomfortable library chair, but she finally understood the theory of the Colour Changing charm and wasn't letting anything distract her from her focus.

"A year ago? Merlin, you're so behind!" Snape seemed to forget their current setting over his overdramatic shock. It was so unusual for Snape to show emotions around anyone.

Madam Pince rounded the bookshelf, three books in her hand and eyes giving a deadly look through the glasses resting low on her nose. "Shh!"

"Sorry, Madam Pince." Severus turned around to her in an instant, not daring to disrespect a superior by not looking at them while talking to them. "I told Pettigrew that she should be quieter. After all, we are in a library."

Madam Pince figured that his logic was viable enough, accepting it without any questions. Walking past the two at the table, she sent Snape a smile before dropping the kind act and glaring at Penelope.

After she had disappeared around the bookshelf, heading back to her desk to go and make someone else's life miserable.

Penelope stayed quiet as she turned back around to face the table. Snape had continued on with his studying, leaning back after writing his title to check it was centred.

"What?" Snape looked up at Penelope, noticing she hadn't picked up her quill since his accidental outburst.

"What in the love of all things Magic was that, Snivellus?" Penelope frowned as she looked to him for an answer. "I have a reputation to mend and you're meant to be helping me, not sabotaging me."

"Your reputation is broken beyond belief, Pettigrew." Snape dipped his pen back into my inkpot in the middle of the table. "I'm sure it can handle one more crack."

Oh, how much I want to tip that inkpot over his head.

Penelope closed her eyes as Snape went back to writing on his parchment nonchalantly. The boy clearly didn't care about her, so why did he agree to Dumbledore's suggestion to help her? There's no sense behind it at all.

There was also no reason for his words to hurt as much as they did. He didn't care about her, but she didn't care about him either.

She wanted to say something snarky and cruel to him back, knowing it wouldn't affect him half as much as his words hurt her. She realised that – the constant need to fight back – was a part of her newfound problem.

But Rome wasn't built in a day, and all of her problems needed time to get fixed too.

"You know what, Snivellus?" Penelope stood up from her chair in the library, not caring about the repercussions of causing a scene in the Library for a second time. "You're just so much of a self-"

"Penny!" Sophie came to her side in an instant, calling quietly into the distance of the Library. "I found her!"

Sirius came into her eye line only moments later. Looking from side to side, he let out a breath of relief when he saw Sophie, and held it again when he noticed Penelope's aggravated expression.

"Oh, Snivellus." Sirius pretended to greet the boy still sitting at the table, waiting for Sophie to finish her insult to him.

Sophie put an arm around her best friend's shoulders, dragging her attention away from the boys. "We have an opportunity for you to relax and have fun." Penelope lifted her eyebrows, open to any ideas for fun since she had spent four hours wasting away today.

"A prank!" Sirius lifted his arms in excitement.

Penelope thought about the offer for a moment, before sending a small smirk to Sirius.

"Pettigrew." Her attention moved to Snape at the table again. "Fixing your reputation, remember?" Severus tilted his head to the side slightly, narrowing his eyes only slightly.

Penelope spent a few more moments, contemplating what mattered more to her. An already ruined reputation or a way out of studying...?

Merlin, let Lily forgive me.

"What's one more crack in my shattered reputation, right?" Penelope turned her head to Snape, grabbed her Transfiguration book and homework, and sealed her fate for the rest of the night.

Nothing was going to come between her and the chance to have fun.