The Rich Boy's Assistant 2

Chapter 7 - Midnight Thoughts (Edited)

JACOB

I don't want to sound like a total ungrateful person but I have to admit that this bed is so fucking uncomfortable right now. Seriously, it's been creaking with every little turn I make and I don't even want to begin with how hard it is. You probably have no idea how many times I've fluffed this pillow. I'm not exaggerating things that's literally how real this all is. I turn turn to check the time on the mini digital bedside clock which Diego had given to me sone weeks back when he was throwing stuff out from his room... he was kinda late for spring cleaning I guess.

1:35 AM.

I'm not even surprised at this point any anymore because I've slept later than this. Every night, my thoughts swirl inside my head and it always seems like I can't even make any sense of it all. I feel stranded. A lot of things are on my mind right now, for example, I want to leave this place as you must've already figured out by now. I don't feel connected to this place at all, my heart's not here, it's in some other place which I'm not even sure where that place is.

I've graduated from high school already and I know that staying here won't give me the exposure I need to get in the right mental state and then figure out what I want to do with my life from here. Another reason is that I always feel within me that I'm meant to achieve or do something great but I don't know what it is. It's a scary feeling sometimes because, whenever I get clairvoyance like this 9 out of 10 times they always come to reality. I'm so scared of this because it may even be that I'll possibly end up killing someone in the near future. There goes my whole unplanned life, behind bars.

My little sister is always on my mind, I'm always so worried for her because I don't want her to grow up with my parents, yeah, I know it seems like my mom is at some point better than my dad, but honestly, sorry to say this, I don't think either of them were ready for kids. That's the hard pill to swallow but it's something that needs to be made known and clear to everyone. I love my mom nevertheless anyways. She's trying her best and I'm proud of her for that. I just wish we could be one big happy family. Sometimes I look at Bella's family, they may not have much but still they are one lovely bunch of people.

Amongst all these, one thing has always been on my mind ever since I noticed something wasn't right. It's the one thing that scared me the most.

Me.

I suddenly hear someone carelessly drop a bottle and it shatters, from the sound of it, it must've fallen from my dads hand as he dozed off on the couch. Sone people go have some midnight snack... I guess that's his. Letting out a tired sigh. I drift to sleep thinking about what it would feel like to be happy and live in a happy home.

———

Instead of waking up to the birds chirping and light wind blowing, I wake up to the sound of quarreling - as usual - and subsequently drenched in sweat. I had a nightmare which I can't really remember the details right now. It's been a while since I've been having them, even the ones I do remember doesn't make any sense at all. I'm still a bit drowsy but I manage to sit up and that's when I noticed the power had gone off... or we actually didn't pay the bills. No wonder I'm drenched in sweat.

I pull myself together and get out of bed, I don't bother going out of my room now till I know the back and forth going on between my parents has subsided or has calmed down a little. I take my merely good time to freshen up and get started for the day. Today I feel more depressed than usual so I guess I have the right to blame it on that.