i'm jerked off i mean jerked awake
*crackling over the intercom a voice yells-
FOLKS FROM FAR AND WIDE!!! GATHER ROUND FOR THE GRAND OPENING OF THE JONATHAN DAVIS ROLLERCOASTER LATER THIS EVENING*
oh BARNACLES i forgot that was today
(kellin is slepeping like a baby next to me what a fucker)
RIVERS: hey pookie
(his white paper pale other word for white caucasian ghost figure looms around the room)
ME: did you see anything sus last night
RIVERS: i saw fires booty hole by accident but it's okay 👌
ME: thanks
(fir and razz are snoring and drooling in a puddle in the corner)
KELLIN: hrnghh
(i rub my eyes and look down at kellin who is just waking ip)
ME: good morngig my yellow lovely
KELLIN: haiii :3333 XD
(he quietly hums even flow to himself, i get up and walk to rivers)
ME: okay so we're in a situation right now a sticky one
(fire runs over)
FIRE: did you accidently bust a nut 🤣🤣🤣
ME: erm anyways as i was slaying, so, the rollercoaster is being unveiled today
(kellin walks over to rivers fire and i)
ME: and me thinks that quellin might attack
RIVERS: that makes sense because there will be a lot of people there
(razz hops over like a wolf girl you know)
RAZZ: he's weak though we've already done a lot of damage
FIRE: factual
i wanna stop this fight i've become so numb
ME: i don't know what to do i really don't
(we all sit down in the brighr ass room pondering we become the thinkers)
RIVERS: wait WAIT
(rivers leaps up or i guess floats up with a light bulb above his head)
RIVERS: GOOGLY MOOGLY OVE GOT IT! the rollercoaster is above the lava right
ME: WE CAN JUST PUSH HIM IN
(razz whips out their spectacles and a long scroll)
RAZZ: and theoretically shpeaking since it's pride month and quellin is homophobic i think yeah according to the gay agenda we can legally murder him!!!
RIVERS: YAZZSS🏳️🌈🏳️🌈
(me and kellin make out because we are homosexuals in a queer gay relationship men love men IM COMING OUT I WANT THE WORLD TO KNOW)
FIRE: g g g guys i think i have a gay crush
(we all kick our legs back in forth in a circle)
ME: OH EM GEE WHO!
FIRE: fred durst ☺️
(we all giggle)
RIVERS: AWWWW POOKIE
ME: okag back to the plan we go to the grand opening of the rollercoaster and than we ride the coaster and push him off in a battle to the death
(we all nod)
YOU ARE READING
The Pinkerton Hotel
HumorKurt Cobain and his friends Razz and Fire didn't expect their fun getaway at The Pinkerton Hotel would take a turn... for the worst.
