Pain of love

5

The next few days were hell no one was speaking to me apart from Roma, when I would come down the room would fall silent Tamara and Angel cast me wounded looks from where they were sitting and I tried to only come down at night when they were all asleep.

Tom wouldn't look at me, bill would sometimes give me a sad smile but he still wasn't talking to me. One night there was a knock at the door and Roma came in crying.

"What's wrong" I asked her patting the bed for her to sit

"I hate it being like this Florence" she said I hugged her

"I'm sorry" I said and she nodded

"Tamara gets it you know she's just sad you didn't tell us what you were doing she thinks it means you hated us too angels mad she keeps shouting that you'd rather die than spend time with us"

I shook my head

"Not at all I love all three of you I wouldn't have survived without you all I just wanted to go home Roma"

"What stopped you, they were going to let you go you know Georg tried to convince Tom to have someone take you out but he wouldn't have it"

"I couldn't do it the thought of never seeing you all again, the thought of never seeing him again. It was too much I don't know what I want anymore" I said sadly

"What do you think Tom will do now" I asked

"I really don't know Florence georg and Gustav think he should get rid of you bills convinced him not to do anything impulsively but I really don't know anymore"

She cried more I hugged her. I fell asleep stroking her hair and when I woke in the morning she was still there.

The door swung open and Georg stood there "it's time to go" he said, I nodded and slowly slid out the bed leaving Roma sleeping. I understood it was over for me now.

"Should I get dressed" I asked him

He shrugged

"Not a lot of point really"

I nodded I followed him silently taking one last look at Roma sleeping peacefully. I followed him downstairs and out the front door. Toms car was waiting the engine running. He opened the back door and got in.

I tried to meet toms eye in the rear view mirror but he wouldn't look at me. As we drove I stared out the window this was really it. This was the end and I knew it I promised myself I'd be brave I promised I wouldn't fight him or run if it had to be like this I'd die with at least some dignity. A few quiet tears rolled down my cheek and I tried to steady myself taking deep breaths.
We dove further and further out the town we were just surrounded by fields now and the sun was slowly rising in the sky. Suddenly the car began to slow a tiny moan escaped my lips but I pulled myself together I wouldn't die in a state I kept telling myself.

Tom pulled the car over and got out, he opened my door and I got out, he'd already pulled his gun I tried to stand up tall but I didn't think it was working. He pointed with his gun to the side of the road and I went where instructed. I stood and stared at him he eventually caught my gaze and looked at me he stepped towards me lifting the gun to aim at my head. I breathed deeply and held the eye contact if he was going to kill me he'd have to look at me while he did.

"Stop staring at me" he said quietly

I ignored him

"I said stop fucking staring at me" he screamed this time

I moved my eyes to the floor I let a few more silent tears roll down my cheek and drip onto the floor.

"Fuck you for doing this to me" he said

"I'm sorry" I whispered and I truly was.

I stood there waiting and waiting but nothing happened. The tears were falling heavily now but I refused to give in to the panic.

The gun went off with an almighty bang.