Calm after the Storm

Finally free?

TW: violence, panic attack, death threath
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Prison gates won't open up for me
On these hands and knees I'm crawlin'
Oh, I reach for you, well I'm terrified of these four walls
These iron bars can't hold my soul in
All I need is you, come please, I'm callin'
And, oh, I scream for you

Hurry, I'm fallin', I'm fallin'
Show me what it's like
To be the last one standing
And teach me wrong from right
And I'll show you what I can be
Say it for me, say it to me
And I'll leave this life behind me
Say it if it's worth saving me

(Saving me - Nickelback)

[Louis]

A slamming door and murmuring penetrates his subconscious and wakes him up. He is immediately alarmed, even with his eyes closed he notices that he is not in his usual environment. It takes a moment for Louis to understand where he is and what voices he is hearing. That he's safe at Harry's apartment - and that he's not lying next to him anymore.

The memories of last night flood his mind and heart. How good it had felt, how he wasn't even afraid that Harry would take advantage of his vulnerable state and that he couldn't even put it into words to describe what it was doing to his battered heart as he held Harry. Falling asleep with him, holding him just like then. Louis doesn't know when he last fell asleep so peacefully. His body seems to have needed just that rest, not living in fear of appearing too lazy when he sleeps in and risking another tantrum from Jake. Just as quickly, however, comes the realization that he can no longer weigh himself in this security but soon has to go back to his personal hell.

A look at Harry's alarm clock reveals that it's already eleven o'clock. And Louis freezes. He should have been at work long ago. Why didn't anyone else wake him up? What if Jake shows up at the Café and makes a scene in front of everyone for not being home? Or how big will the anger be if he gets worked up for several more hours until Louis comes home after his shift? Louis doesn't know where his head is anymore, what to do first. Instead, he jumps out of bed, almost tripping over from the sudden movement making him dizzy, but still rushes out of the bedroom and down the hall.

"Harry?" he calls loudly and hears the panicking in his own voice.

They almost collide when Harry comes around the corner in no time. He stabilizes Louis with both hands on his upper arms and looks at him just as panicked as he feels.

"What's up? Something happened? Are you alright?" Harry starts babbling. Jay and Anne also come into the hallway and both look at the two questioningly.

"Why didn't you wake me up? I have to work-... Jake! Fuck," he stammers, breaking free of Harry to rush back to his bedroom to get dressed. Harry follows closely behind.

"Darling, these are my pants," Harry interjects softly, trying again to stop Louis by gently wrapping his hand around his wrist. And Louis knows it's Harry and yet he can't help but whimper a little. He hates it. He hates this rushed panic state he's in. He hates flinching at the slightest touch from a man, especially Harry who can't hurt a fly. He hates that he overslept. Just everything.

Louis quickly takes off his pants again and desperately looks for his own things.

"Can you please stop for a moment?" Harry asks cautiously and keeps a little distance from him, which Louis doesn't like in the slightest. And yet it's probably the best.