i try to write about you, your cats, the apartment you lived in, dumplings you promised to cook for me, your absurd pretension; the days are long and endless, you flew back to your hometown and left me to sulk in this loud city that whispers your name everywhere so i stick to my selfish assumptions that i'll be forever thinking about you. you'll forever think of me, remembering, regretting, moping.
i write to remember you but the sour feelings come up to the surface and float visibly and i end up meeting myself from february, i sometimes do not recognise her. i write to remember you but in the end, all i've documented were useless things about you but i take care of these memories like salvator mundi painting on a wall, preserve it and i stare at it for hours. i fermented them in a box, through indian summer, cyclones and recurrent earthquakes, but it still smells like you and me.
maybe it's only me when i walk around carter road, i hope to bump into you just so i could tell myself you're still alive. religion could've been a hoax if you stayed for a little longer. maybe i expected a lot, maybe u couldnt give me more than i thought u could, maybe it's an endless cycle of me losing the love of my life. or maybe it's just carter road.
my friends say that it's indiscreet of me to sniff around the footprints you left and write about it. i swore to protect us from the world but i couldn't protect myself from you, now i sit here at marine lines, befriending the sea and romanticising you as if you're something that the high tide could bring back.
YOU ARE READING
Let Me Rest For Awhile
Poetryshe's the main character falling in love with the wrong ones in this one. [poetry/prose]
