BSD Oneshots

•Bandages - Soukoku•

TW: Su*c*de and SH

"You damn bastard; how many times am I going to stop you from killing yourself?! Seriously, you need a better hobby." Chuuya lectured Dazai as he sat on the red head's couch.

Chuuya had just saved him from almost dying again. Dazai was very close to jumping off of the apartment complex roof when his former colleague grabbed a hold of him and dragged him down to his apartment. The petit man was in the middle of yelling when the younger let out a sharp gasp as though he was in pain. Dazai grabbed at his forearm in response to the pain which accidentally caught the attention of the other person in the room.

Chuuya stopped talked once he noticed the reaction of the other individual.

"Let me see" he whispered to the tall man.

Dazai only shook his head.

"I won't get mad at you, I just want to clean them up. Please, show me." At this point the redhead had knelt down in front of the other and was resting his hand on the brunette's knee.

"Bathroom, I don't want to get blood on your carpet" was the reply he got before following the tall man into the bathroom.

After turning on the bath water, Chuuya slowly began to remove the bandages wrapped around the arms of the man who was sitting next to him. The cuts were recent, and Chuuya instructed Dazai to put them under the running water, which he did. The smaller man threw out the old wraps and grabbed a new roll from the medicine cabinet. When Dazai worked for the Port Mafia he would often store some of his belongings in the older's apartment.

"You kept them?" Dazai asked as he turned to look at the man.

"I hoped you would come back. You're lucky that I kept them." He replied and lightly took the other's arms and started to dry them off with a towel.

"I didn't want it to be like this you know?" The brunette spoke watching the other take care of him.

"Get bent"

"It's true"

"Did you ever care about me? Was everything you've ever said to me a lie? Before you left you promised that you'd never cut yourself again! That was a lie! All you ever did was lie to me. It's fucking exhausting."

"I didn't plan to hurt myself again, it just happened, I don't know why I did it. I've never lied to you Chuuya. Believe me leaving the mafia was the hardest decision I've ever had to make, because I knew that I would have to leave you as well. It was the hardest thing I've ever had to do."

"And now? Now that you see me after four years?"

"I'm happy. Happy that you have survived this long. I'm also very proud of you, you deserve the world"

"I hate you"

"I know, but here you are treating my wounds."

"You abandoned me"

"I love you" the brunette said, catching Chuuya off guard.

"Don't say that, please don't."

"How come?"

"Don't get my hopes up. Don't make me think you'll stay in my life and then walk away. Please, I can't do that again!" The redhead was close to tears.

"Chuuya, I want to be in your life. Please allow me to." Dazai said as he lifted his hand to the other's cheek and started to rub it with his thumb.

"If I hurt you, you can put a bullet in between my eyes"

"I wouldn't have it in me to kill you"

"I love you" the younger man repeated.

Instead of replying, Chuuya turned his attention to the cuts he was tending to. He carefully lowered his head and began to lightly kiss every single one, old and new.

"I never stopped loving you Chibi"

"What are you expecting me to say to that?"

"Nothing, I just wanted you to hear it."

The room became silent and the mafia member wrapped the bandages around the trader's arms. It didn't take long for him to finish it. Dazai got up to leave but stopped when he heard the redhead's voice.

"How can I be sure you won't leave again?"

"You can't. All you can do is believe what I've said."

"Will you leave me again? Yes or no?"

"No. Not unless I'm dead."

"Do you truly love me?"

"How many times do I have to tell you I do?"

"Just answer the fucking question!"

"Yes, I do"

The petit man didn't know what to say, he just hugged him.

"Promise me you won't leave"

"I promise, I love you"

"I...I love you too. I never stopped"