Starting on April 18th, AFAAOCSAAABAS Act 2, The Hero of Sardiniastan explores the hidden lore of the renowned country of Sardiniastan! Unlike Act 1, it has TWO TIMES the romance, action, AND mental instability! From killing a tyrannical dictator to...
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Part 21: The Search for Hachara Is On!
- while the six make their way to a nearby restaurant, rafael and sanchez have finally reached the storefront-turned-government-base - RF: you BETTER keep quite, we can let them know we're here!! TH: (he nods) RF: (sylthers up to the door and beings to try and unlock it) -before he can, two agents unlock the door, busily chatting- RF: (he silently screams, grabs Sanchez, and jumps in a nearby bush) FN: Eh? Whassat? You hear anything, Trace? TR: Nnnope. FN: Musta been my imagination again... (the two agents keep walking, leaving the door unlocked) RF: (peaking out of the bush) (whispers) Score! (He takes the man child and swiftly makes his way into the storefront) TH: (shuddering in fear) RF: (whispering) señor, are you okay? TH: (his eyes are shut tight) i don't want to be here.. RF: (gently cradling him) what!? You said to come here... tell me why you dont want to be here! TH: can we just find hachara and leave? RF: got it (he places him down) go look over there, ill look over here TH: (he hesitates, but then scurries off) RF: (digging around threw the desks, tables and cabinets) where is it.... SB: (She stands menacingly in the corner, the axe resting near her) RF: (he turn a round and catches a glimpse of the ax) Score!! (he reaches for the weapon) SB: (she grabs his hand, painfully squeezing it) RF: HRRRRRRRNNNGGG WHAT THE (he turns to face the one who squeezed his hand) Heck.... (his face is stone with fear) SB: (her cold eyes stare right through him) RF: (paralyzed with fear) SB: (her eyes narrow, and she starts reaching for something) RF: UHH UHH UH immmmm sorrry???? JUSTLETMEGOOO WAAAAAA SB: (slightly taken aback by his outburst, she pauses for a second before grabbing the axe and holding it out to rafael) RF: (shocked by the kindness) th-thanks... (he grabs the ax swiftly) SB: (she began speaking in a thick accent) Now leave. If you come back here, you are dead. RF: (he rapidly nods his head) Sanchez, come on lets get out of here!! TH: (scrambling back to rafael) (clinging onto Rafael) RF: (he takes his friend and the ax quickly out of the storefront) NR: Not so fast (He blocks the exit) RF: (he screeches to a halt) AHHHHHHH NB004: Did you seriously think I was stupid enough to let this happen? (He pulls out a glock) Not me. I'm not like those other fools, Im- (Suddenly he trips and faceplants on the ground) RF: (looks at the fallen ball) umm.... NR: (He gets back up) As I was sayin- (He notices that his facepaint had smeered off) AAAH WHAT THE- NOOOO, DANGIT I GOTTA GET OUT OF HERE BEFORE THEY SEE ME! (Norem dashes for the nearest bathroom) RF: (watches as he dashes away) ... Welp that happened. (He nonchalantly sylthers out)
Part 22: A Fortunate Encounter with a Snake
NB004: (passing around somewhere on the road) shtupid shtupid i hate them.. i cant stand them... Rf: (carelessly walking down the road, eyes closed humming to himself) (He runs straight into Lulenski) NB004: Hey watch were your goin- (She looks down at the worm lying there on the ground, his hat on the ground, next to the an beautifully engraved ax and a strange sardiniastan ball. Hes rubbing his head in pain, making his fluffy, dark chocolate hair flow gracefully around white and blue face) Uhhhhhhhhh.... Rf: (in broken english) ahccc sorry of that... not of attention payings TH: (glaring at lulenski) NB004: (she reaches a hand out to Rafael) nnnneeddd aa-a ha-aand? TH: (hissing softly) RF: (he gently grabs Lulenski's hand and pulls himself up) thanks...erm... of whatings is yuor names? NB004: (staring at him, dazed) lu-lu-Lulenski.... whats yours... RF: of name is Rafael... pretty is of the name of you..... TH: (muttering to himself as he is subjected to their lovestruck conversation) NB004: (looking at the strange creature on the ground) is... that your son? RF: no no, that is of uhhhhh a adult of I taking cares of... Sanchez has 23 years.... TH: (he angrily glares at lulenski) NB004: i dont think it likes me... RF: (in spanish to Sanchez) oh be nice to her!!! TH: (he rolls his eyes) ohh surrree anything you sayyy.... RF: whats your problem? TH: i dont have a problem! youre the one being all loveydovey with her!! RF: (blushes) no im not!!! Im just being polite! TH: sureee.. can i have hachara back now? RF: its over there next to my hat... AHHH MY HAT! (He dives to the hat and quickly puts it on) ahahhh so embarrassing i hope she didn't think i was ugly without me hat on uhhehhhehhhhhhh.... TH: (he scoffs and scurries over to grab hachara. he begins cradling it) i missed you so much... NB004: (staring at the two strange men) Rafael... it was nice meeting you... but i should be going. I hope we can meet again... RF: (still flustered from his hat conundrum) yes... yes, of see you laters- WAIT! Before of you leave facebook of havings you? NB004: im sorry, but i dont know that that is.... RF: (dejectedly) i see... Lulenski... um... if you are not of busy laters, would you of joining me to go to dinner? If no that of fine I understanding... NB004: id... love too, but where should i meet you? Can you meet me at the hotel where im staying Rf: the one of down the streets? Yes of course. I of meets you there at 7 okay? NB004: sounds... lovely. Goodbye Rafael, see you soon. (She walks back to the the restaurant, light on here feet with the lovely evening she is looking forward TH: whatd she say?? RF: (in spanish) i have a date for dinner, thats what you need to know TH: (he pretends to gag) ech, dont even DARE to drag me along!! RF: I wouldn't DREAM of that! TH: WHAAAAT? you dont want ME to come??? are you just going to ABANDON me?!? RF: hrmmpf.. i guess i can find away for you to come. I dont want you terrorizing people... TH: (gasp) REALLY!?? RF: if you must! But i REALLY want this date to go smoothly, so you BETTER not misbehave. TH: (he nods ecstatically)
Part 23: The Second Worst Day of Irene's Life
- meanwhile, in Irene's office - IR: (pacing back and forth in her room) Oh cod oh cod oh cod.. wwhaat do I do...? CB: Calm down doll, it gonna be fine, whats botherin' you anyways IR: The past has finally caught up wwith me.. i thought I could be rid of him forevver, but apparently not! (she starts laughing nervously) It just came out of NOWWHERE and noww I havve no idea wwhat to do next.. CB: what's troubling you? Is it that worm palooka out slythering around i keep hearin' about? IR: No, no.. something wworse.. CB: whats worse? IR: It's.. It's my son. He's back. I don't knoww HOWW, but he is. CB: you have a... son? IR: (she sighs) Yes, yes I do. I .. got rid of him around twwenty-three years ago, but apparently, he's still alivve by some sort of accursed miracle. CB: excuse me WHAT!? IR: Wwhat? Wwhat's so hard to understand about it? CB: what did you DO with your CHILD IR: I put him in a dumpster. CB: Um, whats WRONG WITH YOU?! IR: Wwhat wwas i supposed to do?? Keep him? He wwas insufferable, annoying, and had the most CHILDISH needs. CB: Well, its a CHILD, of course they are like that! IR: Wwhatevver, the past is in the past. Let's focus on the NOWW. Clearly, my son is bent on revvenge against me. I need to act before anything can happen. CB: what's your scheme for taking care of this guy, eh? NR: Boss, I'm back (He sees Irene with Crowbar) Oh, am I interrupting something? IR: No, no, you're fine.. Do you havve anything to report? CB: (sorta to himself sorta to Irene) are you just going to ignore my question or..... IR: (she sighs) Crowwbar, I'd appreciate it if you'd back off. I don't KNOWW wwhat to do, seaing that this is a vvery stressful situation for me. CB: (mumbling to himself and walking away) IR: (she turns back to norem) Noww, tell me, wwhat do you havve to report? NR: (He sweats a bit) Oh, right. The little dream team broke into our headquarters and stole an axe. IR: They WWHAT??! HOWW DID THEY GET IN?! WWHO WWAS WWATCHING!? WWHY DIDN'T YOU STOP THEM!!? NR: Um, I did attempt to stop them, but I had an accident... The problem is that they know where we are hiding, and could be a potential liability now. CB: (piping back in) We could always move... NR: Yeah, but it's impractical It would be better to detain the targets before they spread information. IR: MOVVE? Are you KIDDING me?! Do you KNOWW howw long it took to wwrestle this storefront from the greedy hands of some random freelancers?! And YES, it should be OBVVIOUS that we need to DETAIN THEM. NR: And a three man force isnt going to cut it this time, we need much more manpower this time. IR: (mockingly) A three man force isn't going to cut it... (normal voice) That's what hired mussel is for, isn't it?! NR: If youre talking muscle, you may wanna let Matchsticks and Cans in on this If you don't want a repeat of the last few times, I suggest we take it up a notch IR: I can call Cans ovver here.. do you mind getting Matchsticks? NR: I'll see to that, swiftly. (He promptly exits the room) IR: (she fishes around in her desk and pulls out a red bell) IR: (with a quick ring of the bell, cans comes crashing through the wall koolaid man style) (with a quick ring of the bell, cans comes crashing through the wall koolaid man style) CN: OH YEAHHH! IR: Cans. What have I told you. CN: sorry... IR: (she sighs) Wwhatevver. Go find Sawwbuck and take him wwith you to find the wwretched wworm. CN: (he nods and carefully exits through the door) SB: (chilling in his dorm, watching tiktok on his phone) CN: (opening the door and peering in) HEY!! boss lady says she wants us to go look for a worm! SB: (throwing he phone up in the air in fear) GAHHHH- Oh its you hi- (this phone hits him on the head) ouchie... CN: come ON, get up, we don't have all day SB: Sorry!! (He slips his phone away and grabs his hat, then walks out with Cans) - they quickly begin their search, around the same time lulenski returns to the restaurant -
