Waiting For You [ Gojo satoru x Male! Reader]

Chapter 9

Dream

I watch the flashing scenary while looking out of the car window. It reminds me of my constant fear for everything. It rushes outside of the window , leaving for a temporary moment only for it to return again with a stronger comeback. Returning to Tokyo was the thing that I always think about, however , it was not with the intention of wanting to return, it was rather about how I never wanted to return again. It is like a curse for me. It haunts you and disturbs you and you can choose to ignore it. It seems easy at first and life was beginning to look normal again. You get to start a new life, a new career and everything.But the longer you stay away from it, it demands your presence at times when you least expect it.

For me the chances were low, I have decided to never return to that shitty city ever again. But here Iam , sitting in the front seat of Gojo's rented car, contemplating about my misery and regretting my decision. However, the deed had been done, there was no turning back. I will at least give it a chance, and maybe if it turns out to be great, I would consider being in Tokyo although I highly doubt if that would happen. The curses at Tokyo were ruthlessly cruel and strong.
"When we get there, you are officially a special grade sorcerer" Gojo told me while packing my luggage. The problem is that, I have not trained for years. I was a 1st grade sorcerer back in the days, but I was solely a backline sorcerer because I was not the best in combats. Although, people told me that a backline was equally important like the frontline, it hurts me a little bit. Seeing my foes fighting with their life to maintain peace, I stood there in the back , secretly attacking enemies and rest when my cursed energy is drained.

"Can I just be a mentor?" I broke the silence. Being a teacher and a mentor would not be that bad, it will indeed be tough, but it will not involve risking one's life. But then, being a teacher will require me to take some missions too. I was hoping for the hopeless.
"No" he says .
"I'am already regretting this".
I look out of the window and hug myself.
We pass by houses, buildings, shops and in no time the sun was already low in the horizon again. The car ride was silent all throughout the day, we have nothing to talk about. He could have at least show some gratitude or something, it's not practical to steal a man from the life that he had established. Moreover, he could have least come up with a thing to say.
"Are you tired?" he ask me. "Why do you care?" was my first respond. However, I conceal my pettiness.
"Not really, although it is a bit boring"
"Well, you can try to sleep"
"What if I don't want to?"
I snap at him due to the anger from my heart. I do not know what I was so angry about. Yet, I feel like my chest is going to explode out of anger.
"Did I do something wrong?" he ask, looking away from the road and turning his face towards me. There was a genuine confusion and worry in his face. He must have sense my anger. "You should not worry too much (m/n), I know it's hard for you ,but you are an excellent sorcerer, you are just unaware of it. Besides, you would be with me most of the time. Now smile~" he assures me and immediately the mood lightens.
"God! Being with you would be a pain in the ass" and I couldn't help but smile a little. Maybe I was just being petty all along.

I was feeling tired and in no time I fell asleep while watching the window turn different pages as the car accelerates. In my dream, I was still in Hokaido fighting that slimy curse. The curse was taking the upper hand and I could not move at all. Then, the scene changes back to when I was 19, confessing my feelings to Satoru for the second and last time.
His face was a blur , I can see him but at the same time it was not clear at all. I do not expect him to reciprocate my feelings but I want him to.
"Give me some time (m/n)" he said. Was the 2 years not enough? If he do not like me , he can say it. There will be some hard feelings but it will be a lot easier for the both of us. The funny thing is that he was the one who showed his interest first. It was our first year and the first time that we dined out as a group. Gojo had the crazy idea that we all drink sake and get drunk. "No" was our immediate response.However, the night got wild and we found ourselves getting tipsy. We talked and laughed, with zero worries about the consequence or the future. It was because of that night that we became extra close with each other.
"Satoru, if you happen to date a guy what is your type?" Shoko asked with her calm voice while lighting her cigarette.
"Hmmm. Oh! Someone like (m/n) chan!" he said without thinking twice.

The dream must have ended as I can feel my eyes adjusting to the sudden brightness.
"Wakey wakey , (m/n) chan"
The first thing I see was Gojo's smile.
"Ugh! are we there yet"
"Not yet" he say while opening the door.
"It's getting late so I figured that we can stay the night here"
"I'm surprised to see that you actually have some consideration"
"Ohh (m/n) I did not wake you up for you to choose violence" he bickers back.
"Haha you're funny Satoru"
I hear a click from the door and see Gojo opening the door for me.
"I can do this by myself you know, I'am not a baby"
"Shush (m/n) you are my baby"
I blush. "What?"  he looks away after realising what he had just said.
"Nothing"
I step out of the door and lose my balance, I nearly fell but Satoru was quick enough to grab me. Our faces were mere centimetres away and I caught myself staring at his lips. He too did not move away and he was taking a good look at my face. But he drew himself away.
"You okay?" he ask pretending to know nothing.
"Yes, I was feeling a little dizzy. Probably from the nap" I reply as we stand face to face underneath the pale moonlight.

"Nap? You were asleep for 5 hours" he grins and ruffles my hair. "And I'am sure you must have a lovely dream since you kept calling out my name". I blush, did I say it aloud?Most probably yes.
"Shut up" 
I check the surrounding for the first time. We were parking at the garage of a motel.
"Let's go shall we"
I nod  while following him to the motel.
The inside of the motel was so brightly lit and the atmosphere was homely unlike any of the motels that I have been.
"Can we book a room please" Satoru ask.
"Oh yes! You young couples are just lucky. We have one room left" the woman at the reception informs us.
"We are not together" I said while smiling at the woman. Strangely enough, I can see Satoru's face turn into a frown. Was he unwilling to share a room with me?
"We will take it" he say and turns to face me.He walk towards me and grab my hands. We walk outside and he let go of my hand.
"I'm hungry (m/n) lets eat, I'm sure that we can find a place to eat" he beams and I agree with him as I was feeling hungry too. "What do you want to do (m/n)? Of course aside planting and all.Do you have anything that you want to do? Because seeing you confined in the island and being so lonely by yourself kinda hurts  me."  I can tell that he was sincere in his words and he was indeed right. I never realised  I was lonely until now. I was in denial ans I thought I was happy. There  were happy times but I do not have anyone to share anything with.
"I want to do a lot of things Toru" I reply.
"I want to experience every emotion and feelings to have ever existed. I want to be someone's heart. I want to travel around the world and be an excellent sorcerer who fights and save everyone without any hesitation and force. The list continues"

But all those things that I wanted to do are just not possible. That life is just not for me. The alley that we were walking past was dark and cold. Most of the shops were closed but at the far end we could see a faintly lightened store. We were walking closely together but we were sure to keep a gap between our two bodies.
If there is anything I need to do right now Gojo Satoru, it would be holding your hands down the avenue even if you do not have any feelings for me.

_____________________________
hi guys! iam back. i have recently finished my exams and i apologise for not updating. therefore, i have come up with a new chapter and will try to update twice this week to compensate for the 3 weeks of not updating. i truly thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my story . i also want to thank all the people who have voted all the chapters, you know yourself. bye for now and i will see you guys again sometime this week