Waiting For You [ Gojo satoru x Male! Reader]

Chapter 16

Why is my heart broke?

"Hi (m/n). It's Satoru, and I want to tell you how sorry I'am for being such a jerk.
Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry,sorry.
I know I don't deserve your forgiveness but I want you to know I'm sorry. I miss you and your flat ass!" he laughs behind his phone and I was giggling like crazy.
We talked about hanging out and what we would do later. Eyes sparks like the fireworks that we saw on the calm before the storm. It was magical, lovely, beautiful and mystical.

Was that a dream? But it felt so real to be just a dream. My mind can perfectly recall all the things that had happened before I got up. Unsure of myself, I check my phone. The last time he called me was a year ago. We have been ignoring each other for the longest time, but I have grown used to it. It was merely anything to me now. I have learnt to cope with the pain and finally realised what moving on is about. It means to forget about a person and all the things that we imagined we would be. The air was cold and chilly, the trees have turned brown, and the soil has dried. It was neither too hot nor too cold.
It was just the weather to wear sweaters and long coats. Nanami and I have been dating and we love each other dearly.
Last year was a menace and it turned out
to be quite the opposite. I have become a full time sorcerer and quit teaching, I have rented a small apartment in Tokyo although Kento suggested that I move into his apartment. I get up from my bed and wash my face. The dream kept haunting me and as a result I feel like I need to frequently check my phone, but everytime I do I was met by nothingness.

My phone rang and my heart was pounding as if it was trying to get out from my chest. I hesitated but gave in at an instant, I pick up my phone but instead of his it was from Utahime senpai.
"Hello?"
"We need to hang out! You and shoko and me. We have not had the time to talk properly since you came back and don't you dare try to run away from it. You understand that?", without waiting for me to reply, she hung up. I chuckled at her childishness. Thinking of which, it's been a long time since I have a proper get together with my old friends, it has always been me and Kento and a flood of missions.

I have not seen Kento for a week and it feels really weird, there are a number of his things in my bedroom and the bed has been getting cold without him. I wonder if he is doing fine, I cannot contact him at all for the past week. But luckily for me, I was given a week off. I pave my way through the window and watch the busy street from above. The sight was chaotic, lovely, happy, sad and beautiful at the same time. Figuring I really have nothing better to do, I dress up and decided to stroll around the city.

I never really like the busy streets, but during my time in Jujutsu Tech, I have grown to love the streets. Someone has made me in love with it. The wind blows and it feels chilly as winter was approaching. I was dumb enough to not wear a coat or a scarf and I felt the coldness run through my spine. As I walk around the city, I'am one of the many person that walk around the city, while some have some purpose or ambition, I don't have one. I have been feeling like I'm the odds one out again. With Kento, I feel so reassured but something inside of me keeps bugging for the void in me to be filled. As much as I tried to convince myself that it has been filled, feeling blue on a regular basis had made me doubt my point. I was thirsty and cold, so I went to get a starbucks. I enter the store and I ordered a pumpkin spiced latte, I stood there for sometime, taking time to sip my dear latte, the latte was tasty and it immediately warm my insides.As I was taking a sip, I notice a familiar figure in front of me, I have not seen him for many months. He was tall as ever, and he was wearing his casual outfit that consist of an overcoat and a blue scarf. We made eye contact and everything was in slow motion, the world seems to revolve around him and I. Everything disappeared and there was just the two of us, looking at each other in opposite directions.

I look away hoping that he would go, but my heart was pounding faster than a bullet train.
"(m/n)?" he said while walking closer to me.
"Hi"
"It's been a long time since I last saw you. What are you doing these days?"

I want to tell him that I have thought of nothing today other than him.

"Nothing new, just doing missions and all that shit"
"Would you like to take a stroll with me?"
"Yeah, why not"

We walk on the midst of a thousand beautiful people, each with a beautiful problem. My problem was handsome and tall and ignorant. Maybe it's time to let go of my grudge and start a new friendship with Satoru.
"How's Nanami doing? You guys have moved in right?"
"He's doing fine, how is life with your girlfriend?"
"Actually I've broken up with her long time back. We were just hooking up"

He stops and look at me. He noticed that I was not wearing anything warm and I sneeze without intending to.

Fuck you cold.

"It's kinda hot isn't it"
"Liar. You're literally shivering"
He takes off his coat and scarf and puts it on me.
"Satoru, I'm fine. You don't need to do this"
"I want to."
"Aren't you cold yourself"
"No, I'm just fine when I'm with you"
I look at his eyes through his sunglasses, it looks sad and tired.
"(m/n)" he said and embraced me into his chest.
"I have missed you so much."
"I- have missed you too"

The feeling in my stomach was a confusing one. It was butterflies of happiness, bitter sweet, guilt and sadness.
"We should hang out again, like the old times. Promise I won't be a jerk anymore"

I laugh at his statement. I love when he is like this , to be honest, I love everything about him. I love his ocean eyes, I love his jerky behaviour, I love the way he looks and cares for me.

With Nanami, I have everything. A perfect boyfriend who is handsome, strong, successful, good in bed. There was nothing I could have for. He was perfect for me and he loves me more than he loves himself. But If, I'm being honest I can't fully commit to him. I feel terrible about that and I know he does not deserve it. He deserves to be with someone who loves him as much as he loves me.
The funny thing is that, with everything he gives me be it gifts or affection, I was supposed to feel rich and happy. But I feel so guilty because deep down, I know that I'am not content with it. If people have a boyfriend like Nanami Kento , they would not ask for anything more. I have everything I need and want from him.
I could tell him to give me the world and he would do it at an instant but why. Why is my heart broke?