Say 'Kiss'! • bxb

13. In the closet

Tobias' P.O.V.

There's a small group of us on the floor, laughing and talking about random things, that I'll probably forget in an hour, but that makes me feel so relived. Relieved that I can belong somewhere.

I belong with these people that accept me as their "friend" as weird as that sounds, now that I think about it. But here I am, being a social butterfly for whatever reason.

Maybe the whole Mateo situation made me feel more comfortable speaking my own mind. I feel braver and more open. I guess dealing with an asshole does that to you.

"Let's play seven minutes in heaven!" Roxanne, one of Greg's friends, says excited and someone groans.

"What are we? Teenagers?" Alex, the one who took that picture of me and Sarah - I'm still not over it- says.

Greg however, nods and stands up getting an empty bottle from the kitchen counter before sitting down again.

"Let's do it"

We all sit in a circle excited. It's almost as if it brings back memories from high school, as much as I hated that time of my life. Being a teenager, not caring about what others are saying, being your own worst enemy and hating the world - can't believe I miss all that.

Before we can proceed with the game, Mateo appears, literally out of nowhere and sits down, between Greg and Roxanne. He looks at Sarah that is next to me and then down at the bottle in front of us.

"What's happening?" he asks and Lina answersz

"We're playing seven minutes in heaven. You're in?"

He nods, almost as if he's absent. It's weird that he's not drunk out of his mind yet, since the party started over an hour ago. But his eyes seem a bit swollen as if he has been crying.

Alex is the first one that spins the bottle and it lands on Henry, a guy that we met tonight, but that is extremely gentle and well spoken. He's shy, and blushes, a bit too much when Alex stands up and grabs his hand.

Greg almost shoves them in the closet and closes the door, as we all giggle like some 14 year olds that just discovered what kissing someone means. But then the atmosphere turns weird out of all sudden, with Mateo looking at Sarah, and her trying to ignore him.

The minutes pass as Arun is drinking his apple juice and Lina scolds him when he picks his nose. I sigh and cross my arms over my chest, feeling as if the photo is haunting me. What if the bottle lands on Sarah when I spin it? Will it fix everything, as we talk it out and people will realize there's nothing going on, or will it make things worse?

Mateo looks fucking dead, like a corpse and there's a tiny voice at the back of my head that keeps telling me it's my fault, even though I know it isn't.

The minutes end after what feels like forever and Alex comes out first, with a triumphant smile, Henry behind her a blushing mess. We all see the obvious hickey on his neck, but no one says anything.

It's my turn to spin the bottle, and my heart is about to jump out of my chest. The anxiety is making my hands tremble so bad I struggle to spin it. For a moment I close my eyes shut, not ready to see the result, what destiny has in store for me.

But when I open them, I almost open my mouth in shock, but thankfully control myself. It landed on Mateo, and he looks just as surprised as me. Everyone's eyes are wide and Greg interrupts the silence by clearing his throat.

I stand up, feeling like I'll fall in the process and walk to the closet with Mateo behind me, each step feeling heavier than the one before. We're both inside and it's crampled, a small space, of course. It's a fucking closet. Greg shuts the door behind us, leaving us in darkness.

Our faces are almost touching at how close we are and our feet are tangled, but I can't think about anything else, but how awkward it is. Then I hear Mateo's heavy breathing, making me blush, but then feel like an idiot when I realize he's actually sobbing.

That's when I panic and try to move around a bit, make more space for him. In vain, since, again, the space is too small.

"Are you okay?" I whisper and he wipes his tears.

"Fucking hell. I'm not. I hate you. I hate you so much I could die" he says and I remain silent.

For the first time since the whole thing started, I think about apologizing. But if I do then I admit that it was my fault, when I don't think that it was. It would be wrong to give him the wrong impression.

"You can hate me. I can live with that" I shrug, even though I know he can't see it.

"You fucking asshole" he grabs me by the collar, pinning me against the wall behind me, startling me.

For a moment, I close my eyes and wait for a punch, but it never comes and we both stay like that for some time, not moving an inch of our bodies. We have to stay like this for seven minutes. It doesn't take long before he lets me go and tries to get as far away from me as possible, which isn't much.

"It wasn't my fault" I say again, and he scoffs.

"You kissed Sarah" his finger points at my chest and with every word he becomes angrier.

"I'm gay" I say without even thinking and he suddenly goes silent, for longer than I would've liked before speaking up again.

"What? Um... Well...I mean...Hell"

That's all that he says and I can't tell if he's angry, relieved or just neutral. Is he homophobic? I didn't even thought of that before coming out like an idiot. He could beat the hell out of me here, in a short time.

"Say something" I almost beg him.

"What can I say?" he sounds genuinely confused.

"Anything. Do you understand that I wasn't trying to steal Sarah from you?"

"I... I do?" It sounds like a question, not an answer, so I groan in frustration.

"Well now you know" I cross my arms over my chest and wait.

Silence. Again.