AFTER YOU | ENHYPEN (히승/ HEESEUNG)

1: after you

The sound of rain pouring outside that make me snuggle more into my blanket. The place that I felt safe, the place that I forget about the outside world. "Would have been better if I sleep and never woke up" the only word that stuck on my mind.

My world never the same anymore.

The mess that everyone made in my world giving me no strength but letting me feel like want to die. Maybe that's the only way to escape from outside world. Maybe it would be better if I didn't brought to this world because it will only make me suffer.

Socialize.

People.

Relationship.

Friends.

It sucks , needing to face the same shit everyday. Only if world will be more better place, I would love to live everyday without questioning why.

Why did I must go through this ?

What did I do to make me suffer all this?

How nice would it be if there was only good people in it ..

"Haneul-aa... come out from your room, are you hungry? I cook your favorite food just now.. come out and eat" I heard the voice of my grandma outside the door, calling me in her soft voice.

"I'm coming in second !"

I wipe my tears and get out from my bed, walking toward the door. Though it's hard for me to get out from this room, but she's the only reason I live until now.

She gave me a smile as she set up the food on the table. The house didn't feel like house anymore, it reeks of alcohol.

All because of that old man.

"Aren't you too old to stay in your room, get to your sense or just go out and go to work ! Make money instead of laying your ass down to that shabby bed" he bluff, look at himself. Reeks of alcohol, and the marks on his arm.

Drug.

She looks surprised but then hit him on the arm, telling him off. "Stop it will you ." She says. I stare at him lifelessly as I sat down to the floor and start eating my food. She sat down next to me and stare at me as a smile create on her face, "I hope that you will be independent in the future my sweet puppy.

" When is your shift? Should I pack food for you ?" She brush my hair off to the sud of my face. "No you don't have too.. I can buy myself a food" I reassure her as she nodded slowly. " I'll be back next morning.. my shift is at night so don't wait for me.." I say and take a spoonful of rice. She nod and put some side dishes on my plate.

"Make sure to eat your dinner, and be safe when you walked back home" she say and I nod, continue to eat my food.

After done , I washed up myself up and get ready for my shift. "Lock the door when I'm not home, don't open the door even it's uncle. please listen to me this time grandma.." I say and squeeze her hand tighter, hoping that she listens to me this time.

She smile softly and nod , "I get it.. I can take care of myself. Be careful when you cross the street. Have a good day at work" she smile and cupped my face kissing my forehead.

I give her a reassurance nod and bid a goodbye to her before I lost on her sight.

I walk down the street and put the earphones on me, listening to nothing. This is the only way I can to not communicate to people. I catch on the bus and sit on the chair that near to window so I can get a better air.

I look beside me as I felt a presence that sat next to me, it was a guy on my age that give the same vibe as me. Without knowing I stare at his side profile, maybe I'm lost having to see this side face that I never see before. He turn to me and smile softly, "hi, may I sit here?" He asked.

I get back to my sense and nod awkwardly. "I'm Kim Sian, and the person in front us is my twin his name is Kim Sunoo. What about yours?" He ask and smile cheekily. I look at him in expressionless before answering him, "Park Haneul.." I say and turn back to my outside view.

"What are you listen to?"

"nothing"

Short reply is the only way I cut conversation with people, his twin turn back as he give me cold expression before talking to me. " please give some manners when someone talking to you Ms.. it's not like he wants to argue with you.

Such an arrogant" he speaks.

"I can hear you, I don't even know you and I suggest for you too to stop talking to me." I say coldly, not meeting his eyes. I can see from the side of my eye that he's rolling his eyes back to me and focusing back on his phone.

I push the button, signaling that my stop is here . I wear my bag before walking pass by Sian that sit next to me, "bye! I'll see you again when I see you ! " He wave at me, I still don't know how to respond but to bow a little to him before walk pass by his other twin.

"at least your twin is not bad as u " I mumbles, maybe loud enough for him to hear. I make my way out from the bus and get to my workplace, it's a convenience store. And tomorrow I'm gonna work at cafe. I only do part time to support myself and my grandma.

I walk into the store and get welcome by the staff arrogant face. "shit, I'm getting late. GET ON YOUR TIME NEXT TIME" she threw the vest to my face and keep cursing me under her breath.

I wear the vest and get on my shift. I scrolled through my phone and work when the customer come.

"Welcome!" You greet as u saw a male walking into the store. He comeback again later to the counter, I scan the thing's he buy and put it on the tab.

Strawberry milk

Potato bread.

Cheese sticks

His favorite food. The memories flash back to your mind while my gaze land on the food he buy. I shrug it off and proceed with your work.

I peek one last time to the buyer and stare at him until he lost from my sight. I sigh as I stare at nowhere.

remembering him is hurt because..

After him, I don't know how to love anymore..