Mrs Ahmed Shehu

08 (Part II)

AHMED

Sunday July 31st, 2022.

It's barely 7AM but Asma's here. I watch as she comes down from the car, smiling at the newly employed security man who lets her into the compound. I'm not going downstairs to meet her. I'm not strong enough to do so. I'm going to stay right here.

Today's our last day as husband and wife. It would have been a few days back but she was on her period so we had to wait. There's nothing stopping us now and we've told our families we're not getting back together. It's also her last day in Nigeria. She hasn't told me where she's going yet but I'm sure we'll talk about it when she returns later with the kids.

I stay by the window and it doesn't take long for the kids to follow her out, back to the awaiting car. She doesn't get in until they're all inside and even from here I know she's smiling. The car's gone a minute later and that's when I pull away from the window. It's also the same time there's a knock on my door.

I walk over and pull it open to reveal Suraiya. She smiles at me and as usual, her hands are in front of her. "Asma just took the kids. She said she'll be back with them by 5."

I swallow softly. "You don't have to relay all this to me, Suraiya."

"I told her I'd do so."

Of course she did. She's that nice. I give her the smallest smile I can manage. "Thank you."

"You're welcome."

I expect her to leave as she always does so I turn away, wanting to just go to sleep. However, she speaks which surprises me.

"I made coffee. Would you like a cup? There's toast too."

I stop and slowly turn back to her, not sure I can say anything. Each time she makes something, she ensures I have a portion but she's never come up to ask if I wanted anything. This is a first. She keeps her smile on her face but I notice the hint of nervousness. I'm tempted to frown. She's hardly nervous.

"You said you had some work to finish today so a bit of caffeine would help." She says. "You do look exhausted."

Well, I did say that just to ensure no one worried. I told her and everyone else I'll be working. I'm sure the others knew it was pure bullshit but Suraiya bought it. Or at least I thought she did. I must be tired of acting for her to notice that I'm exhausted.

Her exhale pulls me out of my head and I'm horrified to realize I zoned out on her. She takes a step back. "They'll be in the kitchen." Her voice is quieter and I find myself hating it. "I overstepped a boundary and I'm sorry. Please forget this happened."

Before I can say anything, she turns around and all but runs back down. I stare at the spot she'd been standing in until I force myself to look away. So much for me wanting to assure everyone – and myself – that I'm okay. I walk back into the room and decide to change into more comfortable clothes. I then pick my phone and head down.

The living and dining rooms are empty and so is the kitchen which tells me she's in her room. I'll apologize later. There's a cup of coffee on the island and a plate of triangular cut toasts. I'll bet on anything that those toasts have either jam or nutella filling. She's made the kids obsessed with them and well, they're not bad; especially on days when my sweet tooth decides it wants to frustrate me.

I notice the note last and it's the very first time I can clearly see her handwriting. It's neat and cursive and it's beautiful; very beautiful.

'I was honestly going to pretend as though I haven't noticed anything since I moved in but you actually do look exhausted today, Ahmed, and the kids might notice. I was just worried and if I made you uncomfortable, I'm sorry.'