Esteban went back to Bulacan without seeing me and for some reason, I felt oddly okay with it.
There was no sadness in my system that he did not make time to see me before leaving. I did not even had the urge to sulk and let him guess why I was acting that way. I could not figure out if it was because I became more mature after our first encounter, or I just did not want to expect something from him because everyone knew I would just end up with a disappointed face.
"Na-mimiss na kita ah," that's what he kept on saying the entire time we were on Discord.
"Ayan ang napapala ng hindi nakipagkita sa'kin bago umuwi." I smirked.
He frowned. "Sorry na. Akala ko kasi may oras pa kami gumala after ng finals. 'Yun pala uuwi na kami."
I nodded and smiled as a response. Deep down in my system, I knew that was not the case. Roshaun chose to be in Makati for a while. He had a choice to be here as well, he simply did not just want to.
At doon kumirot ang puso ko. Willing akong pumunta ng Bulacan para sa kaniya. Esteban, on the other hand, was not willing to do the same thing. It sucked giving your all in a relationship not just to be met halfway.
"May sasabihin pala ako sa'yo." nag-seryoso na siya.
"Ano 'yon?" tanong ko nang hindi nakatingin sa kaniya sa screen.
My heart kept on aching because of my thoughts. And the pain I feel was developing into anger. I did not want to plant grudges, I would only make myself suffer from it.
"Nagkayayaan kasi mag-lunch bukas 'yung mga kaklase ko dati... Andon din 'yung ex ko..."
"So?" tanong ko ulit.
Tunay na wala akong pakialam. Hindi naman ako para ma-bother dahil lang makikipagkita siya sa babaeng minahal niya dati. Mas nabobother pa ako sa hindi pagtrato ni Esteban sa'kin nang tama tuwing magkaaway kami.
"Hindi ka galit? Or nagseselos?" siya naman ang nagtatanong ngayon. Bakas ang pagtataka sa guwapo niyang mukha.
"Why would I, Esteban? It's a girl from your past."
"Thank you kasi nagtitiwala ka sa'kin. Wala lang naman 'yon, e. Ikaw naman love ko, e."
I smiled. This time, it was genuine. Matagal na rin 'yung huling bigay na assurance ni Esteban sa'kin. Hindi ko pa siya masyadong gusto noon. Kaya naman iba ang tama ng mga salitang 'yon sa'kin ngayon na mahal ko na siya.
The next day, I went to school with Jennie and Allison to enroll for SHS. Habang nakapila kami sa cashier para magbayad, kausap ko si Esteban sa Messenger. Wala rin naman akong ibang gagawin kapag naiinip kung hindi kausapin siya.
Esteban: hellooo otw na ko sa unli wings hehe don meeting place namin eh
He sent a picture of himself, being toasted under the sun. His moreno skin complemented with the sunlight very well, it immediately made my heart pound.
Me: ingat ej!! <333 have fun with your friends, wag mo muna ko ichat
"Bakit kaya sa lalake, napaka-softspoken ni Gianna?" pang-aasar ni Allison na nakatingin pala sa screen ko. "Pero 'pag sa'tin, kulang na lang palitan niya si Mommy Oni sa lutong niyang magmura."
"Gagang 'to! Hindi malaki dede ko!" hinampas ko siya, saka tinakpan ang dibdib ko.
"Ay si bakla, nag-iinarte pa! Ganda ganda kaya ni Mommy oni!" Binalik niya sa'kin ang hampas niya. "Bakla 'di ka aarte ng ganyan na para bang lugi ka sa Mommy ko!"
Tumawa naman si Jennie at inakbayan si Allison. "Pagpasensyahan mo na si Tyronia ha. Mahal na mahal niya lang talaga ina niya."
"Tama! Nakshie ako ni Mommy Oni 'no!" pinagkrus pa ng baklang Allison ang mga braso niya at inirapan ako.
BINABASA MO ANG
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