Pain of Love - Tom Kaulitz

Puppet on a String

The journey home is spent in silence, each of us thinking back on the night we just had. Ashton's knuckles turn white as he firmly grips the steering wheel. I think it's safe to say he's pretty pissed off because of this Tom Kaulitz guy.

I swallow hard and contemplate on whether to say something or not. I decide on the latter, not wanting to risk annoying Ash even further. I sigh lightly and lean my head back against the car seat. I watch the night flash by as we drive through the city.

Ash doesn't so much as say good night to us as he marches to his room and slams the door. Nick and I follow suit soon after, before saying goodnight to each other.

I quickly prepare to sleep, promptly flopping down onto my bed. It's plush covers envelope my senses. Despite the comfort I find myself surrounded in, my mind will not be put to rest, circulating over tonights events.

More specifically him.

I can't get his stupid face out of my head. I was perplexed by Tom and his brother's beauty, their features unlike anything I've ever seen before. I have always pictured mafia leaders as hideous old men who smoke one too many cigars, and who are one glass of whiskey away from liver failure. Tom was anything but that.

Though I must admit I'm utterly frightened by him.

The way he looked at me made me practically weak at the knees, from fear and something else I couldn't quite place. I also couldn't tell what he was thinking behind that cold gaze. Probably that he wanted to kill me.

The whole interaction with the Kaulitz brothers I found to be quite.. thrilling. I wonder if I'll see him again. I mentally slap myself for a part of me that wants to. Wants to feel that same rush of adrenaline whilst being in his presence. Ash would kill me for thinking that. I know they're dangerous and I know I shouldn't be thinking this at all.

I think of Ash. More specifically about the mysteries of his relationship with the Kaulitz brothers. Why does he owe money to Tom? What could he possibly have done to get involved with somebody like that? I sigh deeply and shut my eyes, my concern heavy for my cousin.

I do my best to cancel out the endless thoughts running wild within my mind and eventually drift off into a deep sleep.

_____

I am awoken by a sudden need for water. I glance at my alarm clock and squint my eyes, the blurry numbers slowly becoming more distinct. 4:24 AM. I groan and pull back my covers deciding to venture to the kitchen and quench my thirst.

As I pad quietly down the hall, nothing can be heard except my feet beneath the floorboards and the occasional distant drip coming from the tap.

I've always had a soft spot for the nighttime, finding a unique serenity within its embrace. When the chaos of the day recedes and night falls, a sense of calm settles over me. It's as if the universe takes a deep breath and exhales, inviting me to do the same. I like to take it as time to think by myself.

I reach the kitchen and begin to pour a large glass of water from the sink. Suddenly, the heavy stench of cigarette smoke fills my nose and I look around in an attempt to find the source. Once my glass is full, I move towards the glass balcony that peers over the sleeping city beyond. It is there that I discover a male figure with his back to me. Since Nick rarely smokes, I know it must be Ashton.

"Ash?" I say, stepping out into the cool night air. He glances over his shoulder at me.

"Hey." He sighs. "What are you doing up?"