Thoughts (Mostly Fears)

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I'm scared that I'll get comfortable 

I'm scared I will never find love 

I'm afraid of sex 


what if this is it

what if it doesn't get better 

and this is it

what am I holding on for?

what am I waiting for


I'm afraid the coffee will get cold 

and no one will want it

that they'll feel it 

taste it

and run away


I made it to 20 

almost 21

no one understands 

how big of a deal this is

that I wake up 

that I choose life


I'm afraid 

I'm afraid that 25 will never come

I'm afraid every day that the demons will win

they are like vampires

so I give them blood

I cut and feed them

like a mother bird to her babies


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