songs I wrote For Fun

Absentia

I remember the feeling of your warm skin
On the cold night of December, you left me
In that fateful night, you flee
While I was playing my violin
Letting my woe flow in the strings
I saw your image in every smell of vanillin

I couldn't keep you
So now I miss you to the core
Cause I can't kiss you anymore
While you flew

You were stuck in bed
While I was fed
Multiple lies about how great I am ?
I willingly became a lamb

The note welted under my fingers, getting higher
While I felt your heart rate getting slower
I was on the stage, everyone listened to my choir
Your body, your own cage, coughing so severe
Going mute, you haven't found any dead clover
Your resolve dissolves, leaving only unshed tears

You've slept it away
And now I miss you to the core
No chance to hold you anymore
You were pushed out of my way

I closed my eyes
I dozed to your demise
I made it all loud
And screamed all proud

While you couldn't even cry
All I put on the table were only implied

I should work on my mind
When your health was getting declined

I could only think of me
Never let the feeling be defined
I let our link be undermined
Instead of being a devotee
I was an absolute absentee
But you only thought of me

I should have cherished you
Try to make it last
Try to restart anew
Why did it go so fast ?

Couldn't escape the past
Now that I know you have passed
Leaving me like that
Making the pain so flat
I can't believe that I outlast
When you made my life so vast

You were always here
Always keeping me near
But when you reached the frontier
I faded into the air
Like a coward hiding in fear
I didn't show any care

I'm not one for repentance
Please don't give me a chance
Just let me dance in my sentence
Grief should be my penance

But I can't help but fret at your clemence
So please come back
I can't reset my lack
The only thing I ask is your presence

I am struck on my knees
But I’ll miss you forevermore
My heart will ache until it’s sore
It's my turn to plea...

You can unleash your wrath on me
But please just be here with me again
I can't walk this lonely path, I'm just a man
One last waltz, I am drowning in the sea

One last time, put your faith in my hand
I know this love could never stand
You had wilted by the sidewalk
No one could stop the ticking clock

You were a great experience
A really meaningful lesson
You tainted my existence
Through the pain, please reach heaven