A Story I Could NEVER tell

B SPEAKING

Hi, my name is B... I'm going to be taking over the rest of this story.

M and I never really saw eye to eye, especially when it came to him messing with other women, which I communicated to him on more than one occasion and nothing seemed to have changed... I always had his best interest at heart for sure... but with timing, aging, and certain life situations, it can really change a person.

I definitely got tired of M and his bullshit, and the space we were in was VERY toxic, and I just wanted to be happy and secure with the man that I loved, but that seemed to be out of my reach.

I've been telling him I was going to cut him off if he didn't show me that he seriously wanted to be with me... The love was there! The sex was amazing! The chemistry was amazing. I could sit in silence with this man and be happy... I guess I can say I knew him very well, but not as well as I thought. One thing I learned was there are no rules to the game... you can't hate the player, you gotta hate the game. So either observe and move accordingly and suck that shit up and keep it pushing... Or pull your weak ass out. I have never been the one to back down from a challenge, and I have a thing for dangerous entertainment... you know, doing shit you know damn well isn't good, but you get a kick out of people's reactions and how they go about situations pertaining to YOU! And along the way, some feelings can potentially get hurt... But that's the thing about the game...
Know your roll and move accordingly!
I eventually got tired of getting into it with his females... so I spent a lot of time working on my brand and doing all the things that made me happy... we spoke every now and again but that was ever so often. At this point, he has had a baby with the other woman who stayed in ****** and that made me feel a way. Shit, I can't feel no way, he wasn't my man and I'm a strong believer in people moving on with their life. Especially considering we weren't in the best space anyways. Then again, a lot of my time was spent on lurking. One thing about me... I'M GOING TO ALWAYS FUCK AROUND AND FIND OUT. FYTB. I also spent most of my time lurking occasionally to see what's been up with him and these other women. I later found out that he had gone to $$$$$... another state and met another woman... for now, we can call her Bean head ass lil girl. Soon after, I found out they had a kid together... and even in the time of me talking to him from time to time, this bean head ass lil girl never went through his phone and seen us texting... I, for shit sho, know she's going to flip her shit if she sees our messages. I stg if my messages ever get leaked, that's the day social media will shut down and I'll have to change my name and move to another state 😂.

But wait... THERE'S MORE.
I also found out that he had another baby... who stayed in Chicago and was older than the kid he had with bean head ass little girl.
No matter the circumstances, M and I are still friends at the end of the day.
There were times he would come over to vent when he visited the city, and we would chat about life, his kids, his actions, and the mothers of his children... with good weed, of course, and my interesting playlist that he liked... I think music says a lot when my lips can't say the words. I think that was his way into my world through the music I liked.

I remember I got into it with one of his girls, and the situation was pretty serious to where my mom reached out to him, and he apologized on his girlfriend's behalf and he apologized on his behalf as well... he also told my mom, "I apologize that I missed the part where I get to meet you."
He never pursued me seriously because he knew he wasn't ready to take us seriously... and I'd rather him play with those other bitches than play with me... but all I wanted from him was honesty and communication.
One time I tried to go through his phone, and he damn near flipped out... that right there told me EVERYTHING I needed to know...

"DO YOU BOO... right now isn't our time... maybe we'll bump heads again.