+
There were a thousand things that Julian wanted to say.
It's not what you think. It's not like that. She's from before — before you. Before the world tilted.
He wanted to be able to tell Nora that she was wrong, even though she wasn't. He wanted to be strong enough, smart enough, to find a way out of this incredible mess he'd managed to make. But, there wasn't one. And so he couldn't. Because, Nora was right — he was seeing someone. And what he'd done here today with her was manage to prove to everyone exactly the kind of person he was capable of being.
He'd done it again, what he'd done to her before, all those months ago. And so now, there was nothing left to say.
After she crushed his heart in the kitchen, Nora helped Julian to the couch, and that's where they stayed, watching television in silence and waiting for the phone to ring.
When it finally did, Julian's stomach just about lurched out of his body, and even though Nora had started beside him too, like always, she handled things better than he ever could.
'Who the fuck is this?'
That was the first thing the voice down the line said, a cocktail of incredulousness and slightly buzzed bravado.
'It's me,' Nora replied plainly, but with an edge Julian knew was with thanks to nerves.
'Nora?'
Albert was confused, to say the least. He hadn't recognised the number in his missed calls because he never had managed to get a new number for Nora. But now, here she was. And while he had a thousand and then some questions for her, the first and foremost among them right now, was whether or not she was okay.
'Is everything alright?' Al's voice was comfort, and sweetness, and the simple sound of him was all it took for Nora to realise just how much she'd missed him.
'Yeah. Well, no — I'm fine. It's Julian.'
'Julian?' Al bristled slightly at the mention of his roommate's name falling suddenly from Nora's lips. He was, he had to admit, wary of being drawn into whatever new calamity might have unfolded between the two of them while he'd been unawares. But beyond that, Albert also didn't want Nora getting hurt. Not again. 'The fuck's up with Julian?'
'He's here. At my place. I, uh, found him, I guess. Earlier on. He's a crutch down and I can't get him up the stairs to your place on my own. You know, on account of physics.' It was an almost-joke from Nora, and it had both of the boys — Julian across from her, and Albert, down the line — suppressing melancholy smiles.
'So,' Albert was quite sure he wasn't taking the most salient information he should have been from the conversation, but he hardly cared, at this point. 'Does this mean I get to know where you live, now? Because I'm saving this number by the way — you're not getting away again that easily — but you telling it to me is a lot easier than me having to take every girl I've ever introduced you to back out to dinner as a bribe.'
'I'm...going to leave that alone, for now,' Nora was almost-smiling, and despite how happy Julian was to see it, there was something devastating about him not having been the one able to bring the light back to her face. 'But, yeah. I'll send you the address.'
+++
The unfolding scene Albert found himself in the middle of less than an hour after he'd finally returned Nora's long-overdue call was a tense one, to say the least.
After she'd hung up from him, Nora and Julian had immediately descended back into the uneasy silence that had been hanging over them before Al had momentarily interrupted it. Julian was sat at one end of the couch he suspected would soon be figuratively (or perhaps literally) defenestrated from the place once he himself was gone from it, while Nora sat at the opposite end, curled up and tiny-seeming again, while the both of them waited.
YOU ARE READING
Under Control.
Fanfiction// The story of a girl who wants to disappear, and the boy who sees her. The story of a boy who wants to run away, and the girl who wants to make him stay. The story of two friends in love, and the messy road to being unafraid. // Up on a hill, here...
