Under Control.

chapter twenty four.

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Calling Julian to let him know that she wasn't going to be able to make it to the show on the morning of the actual show was never going to be a conversation that went down well.

Nora hadn't meant for it to happen — she'd missed the late train last night because her last meeting had gone long, and then there was a freak storm, and she'd gotten stuck. But nonetheless, she understood why Julian was upset.

'I'm really sorry, Jules. But there's nothing I can do,' Nora was trying not to be offended by his stony silence or his monosyllabic answers, but Julian was making it hard. 'I can make it for the last one, before you guys head out on the road. I promise. Okay?'

'It's fine, Nora. Seriously — don't worry about it.' If Julian's tone were different, he might have sounded amiable. But he was mumbling in that distant way he did when he was shutting himself off, and the only thing Nora had left to grasp onto to stop herself from panicking about it, was the fact that she knew how nervous he was for the show, and so she figured (and hoped) that his dark mood mostly had to do with that.

'Are you saying you don't want me to even try and make it over to see you before you leave London?'

Nora's own voice was steady and trying for calm, and at that she was mostly succeeding, even though she felt the opposite of anything like it on the inside.

'I'm saying you're busy and I get it. It's fine.'

Nora could hear movement in the background of where Julian was, and so at least she knew he wasn't alone, she thought. Although at the same time, she wasn't entirely sure what an audience might mean for how the rest of their conversation was about to go.

'I don't control the weather, Jules. You know I wanted to see you — that if I could be there, I would be. But there's nothing I can do. It's not like I did it on purpose.' Nora sureness wavered when she heard Julian sigh at her down the line, one of those long, over-it exhales that he did when he was checking out. 'I am sorry I'll miss it, though. But you'll be great. You're always great.'

'Yep,' Julian mumbled back, his lips popping around the 'p'. 'Great, okay. I'll talk to you later. I've gotta go right now. Soundcheck.'

'Julian,' Nora's resolve finally broke with his cool and final words, the shape of his name in her mouth becoming tense.

'I said it's fine. It's fine. Really. Alright? I gotta go. Bye.' And then, just like that — before Nora had even the slightest chance to figure out what had just happened, or why Julian was so upset about a little bit of snow and a late train — he was gone.

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With thanks to some kind of a minor miracle, Nora had managed to make her way over to London and hot-foot it across the city in just enough time to make it to the gig without having missed almost anything except for the first few songs from the opener. It wasn't ideal — she hadn't managed to get a hold of Julian again before she had left her hotel, and so he didn't know that she was even here. But, she'd made it.

And so that was what was important.

Or, so Nora thought, anyway.

Once inside Nora hung around the back of the crowd, all the better to take in the atmosphere. She'd heard all of the band's songs countless times before, but the mood in this room was something else. She'd never fully understood the heady excitement that surrounded the boys until this very moment, she realised. She'd always known that they were good, but she'd never really had the chance to witness the mania everyone else spoke about for herself, until tonight. And now that she had? Well, now she understood why Julian had been so nervous after all.