LACUNA | YOONMIN

2

I thought about a lot while writing the second part. Many of you will be upset, but those who guessed why the story started like this and how I would progress understand why I am telling all this. Therefore, do not be afraid to share your valuable comments and predictions in the paragraphs and between the lines.
I added the song to the media section for this episode, those who wish can listen to it.
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*Perhaps the butterfly is proof that you can go through a great deal of darkness and still become something beautiful.*

2017 from Jimin's narration

She invited me in without saying anything, without objecting to me, without finding anything strange, although I arrived at her door in a miserable state, with only the rain and wetness missing to make me look even worse. Her silence didn't bother me at the time. I knew that asking me questions would make me cry even more. As a good mother, she knew this too. She always knew. Yoongi Hyung loved his mother a lot. He would spend precious time with her and do things with her that many people at his age probably wouldn't do. He loved to talk about the tea made from tangerine peels that his mother had dried for the winter, and the taste of her special recipe, hazelnut cookies. He would keep the private conversations he had with his mother as a secret in his heart.

If only he knew how impossibly I miss him. All the times I told him I missed him, it was brotherly. If only he could understand how I missed him when I was in love with him and how it felt like a whirlpool. Why was missing him different now than before? My soul was swirling with a lack and beating my rib cage. Even my soul was feeling the lack of someone in my body and was leaving me.

She gave me a sweet smile while gently stroking my hair.

''Jimin-ah, you know you can get the clothes you need from Yoongi's closet. Sleep here tonight. I won't wake you up in the morning, you can sleep as long as you want.''

After nodding her, she went to the upstairs bedroom, and I stared at the door for a while in front of Yoongi Hyung's bedroom. Being there both killed and healed me. It wasn't killing me, but it wasn't keeping me alive either.

I wasn't aware of what I was doing to myself. I wasn't aware that it was me who killed myself while entering his room, wearing his clothes from his closet, using the perfume that was almost completely used on the nightstand opposite his bed and probably why he didn't take it with him for this reason, while entering his bed with his clothes and his scent.

Why had his scent made me docile and made me feel at home? Why do I feel like I need this scent to surround me and protect me like an invisible shield?

While I was lying on the bed right next to the window , I looked at the moonlight seeping through the curtains and sat up slightly and opened. I was thinking about things that I had never thought about before and I didn't know why they took up so much space in my heart.

''Was he watching the Moon from right here at night, too?''

This is exactly what I was thinking while looking at the full moon and longing to know.

What was he doing while he was here and laying down to sleep in this bed at night? what was he thinking?

"Did he watch the sky at night, had he dreamed?"

Why did I feel like I knew everything about him when I actually knew nothing?

I understood that he wanted to get a master's degree in the best schools for his career. But I remember him saying that he wanted to stay here and be on the same campus again. I knew that Professor Lee, who was aware of his talents, wanted to see him on the academic staff and wanted him to continue his architecture career as an educator in the academic field. I was sure that Yoongi Hyung really wanted to have a quiet life. That's why I remember very clearly the days when I said that I dreamed of him as a doctor or a professor.